Lockdown Tales #2 (Polity #23) 4Stars

 

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Title: Lockdown Tales #2
Series: Polity #23
Author: Neal Asher
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 337
Words: 150K

---

I read the first set of Lockdown Tales in ‘21. It was a strictly Polity universe set of stories and I enjoyed them. This time around, not every story was in the Polity universe. I’m still including this in my Polity numbering for the series, but there are one or two that aren’t Polity.

In his intro, Asher really lets loose against Civil Authorities overstepping the boundaries setup for them and how people just let them. He sounded very much like me in fact, or I sound like him (he’s older, so age before me). It made me laugh and cry because I completely agreed and yet a majority of the world didn’t, as they let fear, lies and manipulation determine their fate instead of taking it into their own hands.

I went into this collection thinking I would try to take notes on each story and write up my review that way, the way Marzaat (and others) do. However, that resolution didn’t last very long. With nine stories, each is a bit longer than just a “short story”, so I had to pay attention. I can’t read, pay attention, take notes AND enjoy the story all at the same time. So something had to give. Obviously, I just decided to not enjoy the stories and sacrifice my enjoyment for your edification. Because nobody is as important as you.

And if you believe that, you need some serious help. No, seriously, get some professional help. You rank about the same as monkey poop to me. Honest.

Therefore the notes went right out the window.

Xenovore was VERY similar to the previous book Weaponized and Asher even mentions that in his introduction. I was glad he did or else I would have felt very gypped. It wasn’t the same story but had enough of the same elements that I wished it had been shorter.

An Alien on Crete was a non-Polity story about an alien coming to Earth to awaken Earth’s guardian, blah, blah, blah. It didn’t engage me at all.

Skin was a story about a Polity citizen getting a new skin from a doctor who had run up against Polity rules. Of course, things go horrifically wrong and the skin ends up slithering away to the ocean. It was awesome.

Antique Battlefields was a tale of the Quiet War, when the AI’s took control. For me, this has always been the achille’s heel of the Polity Universe. I regularly overlook it every time I read a Polity book. The idea is that the AI’s are better than us without our corruption. We created them and thus they are inherently broken. That doesn’t fit Asher’s world view and so he just ignores it. It was interesting to see a quick snapshot of the war, but it really brought the aforementioned issue to my mind and so I just couldn’t ignore it.

Ha, would you look at that? I did ALL that without a single flipping note. My brain is awesome, that’s all I have to say. Suck it AI, you’ll never be anywhere near as talented in so many fields as I am.

There was one story where Asher lets loose his hatred of religion, but it was all of one sentence and in many ways felt more of an obligatory thing than because he actually feels that way. I think he does, but the fire is going out.

And that’s enough out of me. This is over 700 words now. Nobody needs to write or read something that long!

★★★★☆

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Table of Contents:

LOCKDOWN TALES II An Introduction

XENOVORE

AN ALIEN ON CRETE

THE TRANSLATOR

SKIN

EELS

THE HOST

ANTIQUE BATTLEFIELDS

MORAL BIOLOGY

LONGEVITY AVERAGING

• All of My “Polity” Reviews

• All of My “Neal Asher” Reviews

Weaponized (Polity #22) 4Stars

 

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Title: Weaponized
Series: Polity #22
Author: Neal Asher
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 481
Words: 163K

---

It’s been almost two years since I read Jack Four, the previous Polity book by Asher. I still vividly recall that book though because of all the pooping. Thankfully, in Weaponized, Asher moves away from that. However, what he moves into is as close to body horror as I ever want to get. I’ll talk more on that later.

This novel takes place before and around the beginning of the Prador War. We follow one Ursula as she moves into the ennui stage of life (somewhere around the 200 year mark for most humans, kind of like a very deadly puberty phase of life), then beyond it and then into the present, where she is trying to colonize a world outside of Polity control. Asher slices the story up into Past, Near Past and Present and slices each time line up and interweaves them. So for Chapter 1, you’ll have Present, about Ursula fighting on the planet. Then we’ll switch to Near Past about the colonists discovering whatever they are fighting in the Present. Then we’ll go to the Past which starts with her going through the military and getting kicked out because of the ennui. While it was handled well, I didn’t like it. It was very different from his previous novels and I suspect he did it just to see if he could but I sure hope he’s done with that little “phase”.

The pace here was just as unrelenting and furious as in Jack Four. Which leads into the body horror. This was also a Jain tech novel. By now, fans of Asher know how horrible Jain tech is, how pervasive, twisting and overpowering it is. But instead of the jain changing the colonists over a period of years, it happens within months, days and even hours. They change from humans to whatever is needed to survive, not only physically but also mentally and emotionally. It was degradation on every level. What made it worse is that they chose it, even if they were under the influence of the jain tech. It became so bad that a Polity golem sacrificed herself to set off the entire CTD arsenal in a prador dreadnaught. Ursula STILL managed to survive and the novel ends with her entity being taken to a Polity AI to be studied. It was brutal. Asher does a great job of showing that the Polity is not some benevolent technocracy but just a series of programs weighing what is the best outcome for the greatest number. There have been times it felt like he was promulgating the idea that they were truly benevolent, but either my perceptions have changed or his writing has changed. Either way, it feels much more inline with my worldview and I for one am ok with whatever the reality of the change actually is.

Another fantastic journey into the heart of a future as envisioned by Neal Asher. I continue to recommend this Polity series.

★★★★☆

---

From the Publisher

With the advent of new AI technology, Polity citizens now possess incredible lifespans. Yet they struggle to find meaning in their longevity, seeking danger and novelty in their increasingly mundane lives.

On a mission to find a brighter future for humanity, ex-soldier Ursula fosters a colony on the hostile planet Threpsis. Here, survival isn’t a given, and colonists thrive without their AI guidance. But when deadly alien raptors appear, Ursula and her companions find themselves forced to adapt in unprecedented ways. And they will be pushed to the very brink of what it means to be human.

As a desperate battle rages across the planet, Ursula must dig deep into her past if she is to save humanity’s future.

• All of My “Polity” Reviews

• All of My “Neal Asher” Reviews

Cthulhu’s Daughter and Other Horror Stories 1Star DNF@50%

 

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Title: Cthulhu’s Daughter and Other Horror Stories
Series:
Author: Rhiannon Frater
Rating: 1 of 5 Stars /DNF@50%
Genre: Horror
Pages: 103 / 52
Words: 35K / 18K

---

I was going to add this to the Cthulhu Anthology series, but once I opened this up and found only the first story was Cthulhu related, I put paid to that.

The rest of what I read was so wrapped up in mommy issues that I wondered why the author hadn’t sought out professional help. It was that bad.

Then I got to the lesbian vampire story and that put paid to the book. I wasn’t sad about stopping, that’s for sure.

★☆☆☆☆

---

Table of Contents

The Old Ones / Cthulhu's Daughter

The Monster with the Human Face

The Vampires

The Werewolves

The Mummy

The Zombies

The Monsters from Beyond

Mirror of the Night and Other Weird Tales 3Stars

 

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Title: Mirror of the Night and Other Weird Tales
Series: ----------
Author: Edwin Tubb
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Horror Anthology
Pages: 148
Words: 59K

---

I was talking with somebody, at some time (I think it was Snapdragon Alcove) and she asked if I’d ever read anything by E.C Tubb. I hadn’t, so I decided to rectify that situation with this standalone collection of short stories by him.

Tubb was quite interested in the supernatural and more specifically, the occultic supernatural. But he was also just fine writing about messed up humanity.

One of the stories is about an older man who has had a stroke. He is convinced his wife has been taken over by an alien and in the end kills her. Only the reader knows everything the narrator is seeing and thinking has been corrupted by the stroke he had. That was the non-occultic kind of scary.

Then you have a story about a guy who robs a cultic temple and takes the jewel from the idol’s forehead. It is a snakegod and he convinces a friend to help him get back to Britain. On the ship ride back, he is mysteriously crushed to death in a locked cabin. The friend returns the jewel and becomes an adherent of the snake god cult.

Tubb is better known (or so I gather) for a science fiction series called Dumarest. I don’t know a thing about it, but after this collection, I’m going to track down a couple and see how they compare. While I wasn’t particularly wowed by this collection, it kept my interest and made me want to check out more by Tubb.

★★★☆☆

---

Table of Contents:

MIRROR OF THE NIGHT

THE ANCIENT ALCHEMIST

THE ARTIST’S MODEL

SNAKE VENGEANCE

THE ENEMY WITHIN US

STATE OF MIND

SELL ME A DREAM

THE WINNER

THE WITCH OF PERONIA

SENTIMENTAL JOURNEY

Cat Magic ★★☆☆☆

 

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Title: Cat Magic
Series: ----------
Author: Whitley Strieber & Jonathan Barry
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: Urban Fantasy
Pages: 353
Words: 134K

Ooooooh boy. * puffs out cheeks *

I’ve never read anything by Strieber before and wanted to give his writings a go. I knew he was horror’ish or real life aliens or something weird, so I thought I was prepared. I had no idea.

I saw the subtitle for this book on a later edition and it was “A Tale of Modern Witchcraft”. I really wish I had seen that before deciding to start with this book. I guess if I could sum up this book I’d go with “sexual orgies while children watch and the only sin is Guilt itself”. Ughhh. There was a lot of theological ideas put forth that I really had to disagree with. Not in an angry way but more in a “are you serious?” way.

While I have a bunch of Strieber’s books on tap, I think I’m going to try his Omega Point duology next. It’s about aliens somehow. If he puts forth more bad theology though, I’ll be done with him. I have no idea who this Barry fellow is or what part he played in writing the story. I wonder if he did the heavy lifting though.

Overall, this was not a good first impression and I certainly won’t be recommending Strieber even if his later books improve.

★★☆☆☆

Dead Silence ★☆☆☆☆

 

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Title: Dead Silence
Series: ----------
Authors: Stacey Barnes
Rating: 1 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 319
Words: 109.5K

Synopsis:

From the Publisher & Me

Claire Kovalik is days away from being unemployed―made obsolete―when her beacon repair crew picks up a strange distress signal. With nothing to lose and no desire to return to Earth, Claire and her team decide to investigate.

What they find is shocking: the Aurora, a famous luxury spaceliner that vanished on its maiden tour of the solar system more than twenty years ago. A salvage claim like this could set Claire and her crew up for life. But a quick search of the ship reveals something isn’t right.

Whispers in the dark. Flickers of movement. Messages scrawled in blood. Claire must fight to hold on to her sanity and find out what really happened on the Aurora before she and her crew meet the same ghastly fate.

Turns out everything was caused by a machine put on board the ship by a rival company that was supposed to make everyone feel dread and uneasiness. The ship used a new alloy and the interactions between the machine and ship drove everyone insane.

Claire survives as does her loverboy and they get rich and own their own shipping company. The end.

My Thoughts:

I went into this with very high hopes. Both Mogsy and Maddalena had reviewed it and while there were some little things that niggled at me, what they wrote sounded fantastic.

Things started out really great. I'm talking Event Horizon levels of great in fact. Which is exactly what I wanted and was looking for. Then I find out the main character is insane, so I can't trust a word coming out of her mouth, then the whole “scary” situation gets “scyenzesplained” to me and THEN romance right at the end where the man knows exactly what to do and what to say like he'd read the main character's insane mind and was pretty much the perfectest man ever.

It blew my mind. In a bad way. I was pretty angry in fact. To go from people ripping their own eyeballs out to scyenze to romance was more than I could take. Stacey Barnes took a space elevator ride straight to my Authors to Avoid list with this book. What gets me is that it DID start out so fantastic. WHY did she have to go and change things and ruin everything? I could smell the hotdog. I could see the hotdog. Then the author gave me a celery stick and acts like it was that all along. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

So if you want a scary story that is ruined by scyenze and romance, this is definitely the book for you. If I cared more, I'd cross post this review to all sorts of other platforms just to give people fair warning. But in about 10 years nobody will ever remember this book, because it truly is that bad. I'll step aside and let Time be the author's executioner.

★☆☆☆☆

A Season in Carcosa (The King in Yellow Anthology #4) ★★★★✬

 

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Title: A Season in Carcosa
Series: The King in Yellow Anthology #4
Editor: Joseph Pulver
Rating: 4.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Cosmic Horror
Pages: 268
Words: 100K

Synopsis:

Table of Contents

This Yellow Madness (introduction) by Joseph S. Pulver, Sr.

My Voice is Dead by Joel Lane

Beyond The Banks of the River Seine by Simon Strantzas

Movie Night at Phil's by Don Webb

MS Found in a Chicago Hotel Room by Daniel Mills

it sees me when I'm not looking by Gary McMahon

Finale, Act Two by Ann K. Schwader

Yellow Bird Strings by Cate Gardner

The Theatre & Its Double by Edward Morris

The Hymn of the Hyades by Richard Gavin

Slick Black Bones and Soft Black Stars by Gemma Files

Not Enough Hope by Joseph S. Pulver, Sr

Whose Hearts are Pure Gold by Kristin Prevallet

April Dawn by Richard A. Lupoff

King Wolf by Anna Tambour

The White-Face At Dawn by Michael Kelly

Wishing Well by Cody Goodfellow

Sweetums by John Langan

The King Is Yellow by Pearce Hansen

D T by Laird Barron

Salvation In Yellow by Robin Spriggs

The Beat Hotel by Allyson Bird

My Thoughts:

My goodness, these anthologies are going up and down for me like a teetertotter! When they are good, they are REALLY GOOD and when it's bad, it's so bad I can't finish them. Thankfully, this was on the upper part of the seesaw.

I went into this a bit worried since Pulver was the editor and I absolutely hated the previous book which was edited and written by him. Thankfully, he only contributed a small part of this. I did realize that I don't like his writing, period though. There were 1 or 2 poems, which did nothing for me. But Pulver's story was the only real let down. Not surprising but it's what kept this from a full 5star.

But most of the other stories were flipping fantastic if you dig cosmic horror. From slides into madness and horror to the unveiling of horrific powers, these ran the gamut from shiver your backbone to a chill of deliciousness running down your spine to the completely inexplicably weird.

I really can't say that any of these were “better” than the others, but the 2 I do remember are Yellow Bird Strings and Wishing Well. YBS was about a former puppeteer who by the end of the story has become the puppet himself. It was hard to tell if he was going mad or if it was all real. Exactly the right tone for a King in Yellow Story. WW on the other hand, had real IT (by Stephen King) vibes with 2 storylines about kids and them now as adults. A twisted tv show created by a cult of the KIY was the focus and the ending where the main character who appears to be a loser the whole time is revealed to be the son of the King in Yellow, or something like that. It was deliciously spine tingling.

Another absolute winner of a read and I'm pretty happy. These books are definitely not for everyone, in fact I'd say that the majority of readers wouldn't go for The King in Yellow, but they fit me like a glove, so I'm going to revel in them while I can.

★★★★✬

• The King in Yellow & Other Stories (Book 1)

• In the Court of the Yellow King (Book 2)

• The King in Yellow Tales (Book 3)

The King in Yellow Tales ★☆☆☆☆ DNF@50%

 

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Title: The King in Yellow Tales
Series: The King in Yellow Anthology #3
Editor: Joseph Pulver
Rating: 1 of 5 Stars
Genre: Cosmic Horror
Pages: 249 DNF/125
Words: 77.5K DNF/39K

Synopsis:

From the Publisher

Collected within this substantial volume of madness, murder, and spectral tragedy are tales of Carcosa, the characters that inhabit the KIY "Play", and Chambers’ cosmic horror. Pulver’s tales adhere to Chambers’ core ideas and themes, and they retain all the mystery of Chambers originals. Joseph S. Pulver, Sr. has been acclaimed by many notable editors, writers, and reviewers, as the contemporary heir to Robert W. Chambers’ "King in Yellow". Have you seen the Yellow Sign?

"'The King In Yellow' reigns over the labyrinthine crossroads between the grand indifference of the cosmic Outside, and the inner wasteland of the tormented mind, so it's no surprise to find Joe Pulver's saturnine face so frequently behind the Pallid Mask. Joe plies the fathomless depths of existential nightmare breathing music and poetry, and brings back strangely beautiful salvage. That he has so lovingly and deeply explored Chambers' bizarre pocket universe without destroying the merest scintilla of its mystery is ample testament to his painfully sharp craftsmanship and terrible wisdom.

My Thoughts:

It turns out this was a collection of madness in the form of frenetic poetry and fragments of prose. I thought I could make it through, surviving on the prose but at the 50% mark I simply couldn't take any more.

I was bored, confused and feeling like someone was grinding broken glass into my earlobes. Not the feeling I want when reading a book. Heck, not the feeling I want, ever.

After the previous book, this was doubly disappointing.

★☆☆☆☆

• The King in Yellow & Other Stories (Book 1)

• In the Court of the Yellow King (Book 2)

In the Court of the Yellow King ★★★★✬

 

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Title: In the Court of the Yellow King
Series: The King in Yellow Anthology #2
Editor: Glynn Barrass
Rating: 4.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Cosmic Horror
Pages: 289
Words: 99.5K

Synopsis:

Table of Contents

These Harpies of Carcosa — W. H. Pugmire

The Viking in Yellow — Christine Morgan

Who Killed the King of Rock and Roll? — Edward Morris

Masque of the Queen — Stephen Mark Rainey

Grand Theft Hovercar — Jeffrey Thomas

The Girl with the Star-Stained Soul — Lucy A. Snyder

The Penumbra of Exquisite Foulness — Tim Curran

Yield — C. J. Henderson

Homeopathy — Greg Stolze

Bedlam in Yellow — William Meikle

A Jaundiced Light at the End — Brian M. Sammons

The Yellow Film — Gary McMahon

Lights Fade — Laurel Halbany

Future Imperfect — Glynn Owen Barrass

The Mask of the Yellow Death — Robert M. Price

The Sepia Prints — Pete Rawlik

Nigredo — Cody Goodfellow

MonoChrome — T. E. Grau

My Thoughts:

In the fantasy Wheel of Time series by Robert Jordan, there is a power called Saidin and Saidir. One half can be used by males and the other half by females. The male half, Saidin, was tainted by the Dark One thousands of years before the series starts. The main character, Rand, can use Saidin but is affected by the taint. He describes the experience as wrestling with fire and ice that is covered with a putrid oil. He never feels more alive than when using Saidin but the taint makes him sick and drives him insane.

That is how these two Cosmic Horror Series (Cthulhu & King in Yellow) seem to be affecting me.

I couldn't stop reading this. The stories dragged along relentlessly. I felt like I had jumped into a river and that it turned out to be way more powerful than anticipated. There were times I was in the center, speeding along, but then there were times when the stories pushed me into the banks or slammed me into hidden rocks beneath the surface. By the end of this I felt battered, emotionally and spiritually. Yet I had never felt so alive either.

It was an extremely disturbing dichotomic feeling. I had to stop and really ask myself if I was capable of reading more of this stuff. While I acknowledge that I have changed over the years, is the change engendered by reading stories like these the kind I want to voluntarily submit to? Whether I like to admit it or not, what we put into our minds does affect us.

Thankfully I don't have to make that decision right away. I've got another month before I cycle back to this cosmic horror duology.

★★★★✬

• The King in Yellow & Other Stories (Book 1)

Myths, Part II (Spawn #15) ★★☆☆☆

 

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Title: Myths, Part II
Series: Spawn #15
Author: Todd McFarlane
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comic
Pages: 25
Words: 1K

Synopsis:

From Imagecomics.fandom.com

The Clown's story continues. Medieval Spawn survives the Violator's blast, but he is horribly disfigured. Even in this state, however, he is able to best Violator with the help of his living suit's imprisoning tendrils. The Violator's severed head is hoisted aloft as a grisly trophy of their demonic battle. Ironically, the woman he sought to protect from the Violator is sickened by Spawn's true form and flees in flight.

The Spawn lays in an alley peacefully resting. When the owner comes out mad that bums in his alley are begging and foraging for scraps, the owner physically pushes Spawn around. Spawn is fed up with people trying to tell him what to do. He beats the man down and barks that this is now spawn territory. The man cowers away.

In Queens, New York, Terry Fitzgerald lays awake, terrified as the mob's men have threatened his family again and he doesn't know what to do.

My Thoughts:

So this whole “Myths” story was standing St. George and the Dragon on it's head. With the Violator being the dragon and Medieval Spawn being St. George. It really pissed me off that the Princess runs away from Medieval Spawn when he reveals his tortured form. I can understand that she doesn't want to get all “Hugs & Kisses” with him but to run away from him after he'd saved her life and killed the Violator that was torturing her? It also raised the question, to me, of WHY was Medieval Spawn all burnt up too? It doesn't happen to every Spawn because we saw the fat child killer who became a Spawn candidate still in “prime” condition. And speaking of Medieval Spawn.

Below is an illustration of the fantastic work that McFarlane can do, when he wants to. It is a great illustration of the talents he has. The problem with it is that it simply makes the times where he rough sketches things in that much more noticeable.

Part of me can understand not doing this level of work for every panel but at the same time, why not? Why isn't McFarlane putting out his best for the whole issue? Why does this particular spread get the love treatment while Terry in his boxers looks almost like a crayon drawing at the end?

Between everything that I've experienced with this comic in these 15 issues, nothing has made me want to continue. I don't like Spawn. I don't like his human Al Simmons. I don't like the 2 cops. I don't like the badguys and I don't like Wanda. I don't like the city or the situations and I don't like the universe portrayed. So I'm done with Spawn. 15 issues is enough of “testing the waters”. Any more testing and I'd be asking for Jaws to come chomp me up into little itty bitty pieces.

★★☆☆☆

• 
  All of My “Spawn” Reviews

Myths, Part I (Spawn #14) ★★☆☆☆

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress, Blogspot, & Librarything by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission
Title: Myths, Part I
Series: Spawn #14
Author: Todd McFarlane
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comic
Pages: 25
Words: 1K

Synopsis:

From Imagecomics.fandom.com

The Clown, being a master of self-promotion, tells the story of a long-ago clash with Medieval Spawn to a small lot of alley kids. He portrays the ancient warrior in the worst possible light and describing him as evil. He takes creative liberties explaining he was the hero of the story. During a battle, a kick from Spawn's horse sends Violator flying, something snaps inside him and he unleashes a gout of mystical fire. The Violator cackles in triumph over the smoking form of his fallen foe.

Spawn curses himself for letting his emotions get the best of him. Now that Chapel knows he's still alive, he can no longer remain a shadow. People may discover he's still alive and come for him.

My Thoughts:

We get the Violator, still in clown form, telling a group of boys a story about his battle with another Spawn 800 years ago. The words he says are at complete odds with the pictures drawn so you know he's lying out of his teeth. It would seem another Spawn had defied Malebolgia, thus giving us the hint that our Spawn might be treading in the footsteps of another like him.

I have to admit, I don't think I'm going to make it to the end of the year with this series. It is just too stupid. I've mentioned this before, but Spawn is supposed to be a Special Forces kind of guy. He doesn't let his emotions rule him but so far, that is ALL he's done in all 14 issues. One stupid mistake or decision after another because of his emotions. It's not that I want him to be emotionless but I don't want to see him ruled by his emotions and McFarlane doesn't go down that route.

★★☆☆☆

• All of My “Spawn” Reviews

Flashback, Part II (Spawn #13) ★★☆☆☆

 

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Title: Flashback, Part II
Series: Spawn #13
Author: Todd McFarlane
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comic
Pages: 25
Words: 1K

Synopsis:

From Imagecomics.fandom.com

Spawn recalls playing a baseball game and breaking his ankle. All he can remember is how beautiful she was and how they made love until the sun came up the next morning.

Spawn decides to focus on finding the man who killed him, Chapel.

At Youngblood headquarters, Badrock is on guard duty but distracted by video games. When Spawn trips a silent alarms, he finds Chapel along with teammates Diehard and Shaft. Spawn teleports himself and Chapel to Botswana to complete his fight.

Terry Fitzgerald finds it hard to fall asleep. Now that two men have harassed him, he knows he's on a watch list which is hard to get on. Yet he can't figure out why they'd be checking into him.

Twitch Williams and Sam Burke rejoice in their investigation finally being lifted for the murder of Billy Kincaid.

In Botswana, Chapel recalls the orders from Jason Wynn to take out his target when things got hairy. Snapping back into the present, he wrestles with Spawn and exchanges punches. Spawn drives the point home by disfiguring the Chapel's face with a horrific brand, that resembles the facial warpaint he wore when he murdered Al. As Spawn leaves Chapel, he activates the Youngblood tracking mechanism.

Eight hours later, Shaft and Badrock arrive and ask what Spawn said to him. With a disgusted and angry look, Chapel simply replies with, "Nothing" as he gets on their plane to leave.

My Thoughts:

So Spawn hunts down the guy who killed him originally. He infiltrates the Youngblood's headquarters (Youngblood's were Image's version of the Justice League or the Avengers), teleports Chapel back to where Chapel killed him and proceeds to pummel the ever living daylight out of him. Spawn uses his magic to give Chapel a skull face like his old costume and then leaves him to be found.

The fight boiled down to a couple of punches thrown and the two of them angrily exchanging macho “I'm tougher than you” stupid talk. It was actually kind of embarrassing to read. It also brought home the point that McFarlane is deliberately writing for teenagers. Instead of showcasing Spawn getting some good intel from the badguy the focus is them fighting and Spawn getting his revenge. I'm sure in future volumes Spawn will use the intel from this guy but it will be of the “remember when I beat the crap out of my old killer, well, he told me....” variety.

On a complete side note. I've never read the Youngblood comics but after this little introduction I definitely won't be. I get the “grim and gritty” vibe from them and I'd bet my bottom dollar that the comics are filled with questionable morals about human life and heroism in general.

★★☆☆☆

• All of My “Spawn” Reviews

Flashback, Part I (Spawn #12) ★★★☆☆

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress, Blogspot, & Librarything by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission
Title: Flashback, Part I
Series: Spawn #12
Author: Todd McFarlane
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comic
Pages: 25
Words: 1K

Synopsis:

From Imagecomics.fandom.com

Spawn is drawn to the top of the Church again. He ponders how the devil twists people's souls with his secret weapon, people's weakness to love. He recalls only being in a church once, which was to marry Wanda. He recalls Terry being there and how he was his best friend. How could Terry betray him and marry Wanda he wonders.

In Washington, D.C., CIA chief Jason Wynn is told by his henchmen that Terry is the number one suspect of compiling damaging information against his bosses and stolen goods. He orders his henchman to have several henchmen make the point clear that he knows about Terry's secret dealings. He then tells the henchmen to watch him to see where he goes once he's scarred.

In New York City, Spawn dresses in civilian clothes as he goes to visit Wanda's blind Granny Blake. He tells her there is an afterlife and he expects her to reach Heaven. He leaves without the heart to tell her that he made it to Hell.

At New York City Police Headquarters, Twitch and Sam discuss how they are now on probation for what happened with Kincaid. Sam mentions it would be a good opportunity to follow up on the lead of the man in the red cape they spotted at Billy's. He's heard that he may have been involved in the bum incidents as well.

In Queens, New York, Wanda, Terry, and Cyan walk home to find several of Jason Wynn's henchman waiting there. One remarks to Terry that he has a nice family and it would be a shame if anything happened to them.

Elsewhere, the bums celebrate the safety Spawn has given them. The celebration takes an ugly turn when a bum tries on Spawn's mask, only to be nearly strangled by it. Spawn pulls it off and warns them he has no control over his suit and that the suit will attempt to protect itself.

Spawn suddenly experiences another flashback. He realizes that the American flag he keeps seeing in his visions represent his killer. The grim reaper he keeps seeing he realizes is the face paint of his killer. He keeps finding himself drawn to not just the church, but the chapel. He identifies his killer as Chapel.

My Thoughts:

Finally, things move forward a tiny step. I cannot imagine what kids went through who were originally reading this one issue each month. With this issue it would have been a whole year's worth of comics, and for what? We know Spawn was a special forces guy who was betrayed and was brought back to life to work for a demon. Oh, and that he wuvvssssss Wanda. Dear spacecow, that's hammered at us in every single issue. Just in case we forgot I guess.

I will say that it was nice to be introduced to another villain, one with a skull face mask, who apparently is the one who killed Spawn in the first place. And we meet their former boss. So, Bad Guys, Assemble! Throw in a couple of Power Twin Rings and we're ready for a real fracas.

I was talking with SavageDave in the comments of the last issue of Spawn and it made me realize I think I'm going to try to hang onto this series until new years. Then when I'm evaluating what to do for 2022 I'll make a firm decision to continue this series or not. I'm also trying to not be as hard nosed about the books I read as it affects me in other ways too.

★★★☆☆

• All of My “Spawn” Reviews

The Infernal Express (Adventures of the Royal Occultist #3) ★★★✬☆

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress, Blogspot, & Librarything by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission
Title: The Infernal Express
Series: Adventures of the Royal Occultist #3
Author: Josh Reynolds
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Urban Fantasy
Pages: 199
Words: 68.5K

Synopsis:

St. Cyprian is coerced into taking the remains of Dracula and giving them to the Turks and jannissaries, Dracula's ancient enemies. A cult of Dracula wants the remains for themselves so as to raise their lord from the dead. The jannissaries also want the remains as they don't trust St. Cyprian to be able to keep the remains safe from others. And finally, the secret vampire society wants the remains so they can lock them away and keep Dracula from ever rising again. Oh, and Lucy Harker, a half-vampire, thinks she's the only one who can deal with her daddy's remains.

All of this ends up taking place on a train towards Constantinople, through land barely over World War One. St Cyprian is an idiot and gets infected by Dracula so he has to contend with enemies within and without. Eventually he, his protege Ebe and Lucy get the remains to a sacred monastary with a pool of holy water. St Cyprian cleanses himself from the vampire taint and then throws the remains of Dracula into the holy water, which while not eradicating him, will hold him captive.

During all of this Dracula shows St Cyprian a future where the Old Ones have returned to Earth and humanity is on the brink of extinction, not from fighting the Old Ones, but from worshiping them. St. Cyprian has seen this vision in the previous stories so he knows Dracula isn't making this up. So St Cyprian must find a way to prevent this future without allowing a monster like Dracula to use it for his own ends.

My Thoughts:

Another fun entry in the Royal Occultist series. At the end of the book was the prologue and chapter 1 of Book 4, which was untitled. When I contacted the author, he told me there had been issues with the publishing company so book 4 was never published and he didn't know when it would be. I'm guessing rights were involved.

This was extremely action packed from beginning to end and it did make me wonder how St Cyprian has lived as long as he has. He certainly doesn't seem to know half of what he should and as for him trying to teach Ebe anything, that girl seems to think she doesn't need any teaching. It's frustrating to read about but also so true to life.

I thought Reynolds did a good job with handling the Dracula lore in such a way that it fit right into the Royal Occultist world but also putting his own unique spin on it. Making Dracula a being that is on par with the archangels in terms of power was clever.

With no more books, I'm done with this series. It was light and fun and if Reynolds ever writes more, I'll be reading them.

★★★✬☆

• The White Chapel Demon (Book 1)

• The Jade Suit of Death (Book 2)