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Title: Gods of the Mountain
Series:
Cycle of Blades #1
Author: Christopher
Keene
Rating: 1.5 of 5 Stars
Genre:
Fantasy
Pages: 307
Format: Digital
Edition
The
author of this indie book convinced me to review it with a rather
humorous comment on my “Review
Policy” page. Asking for a bad review, that I can handle. He
seemed like a nice enough guy when we emailed, so I thought “Sure,
why not take a chance.” And if you read the reviews over on GR, it
DOES sound like a bunch of paid shills. And he has a BA in English
Lit (I believe), so it couldn't be THAT bad, right?
First hiccup was
him emailing me a second version. This was supposedly released in
2017, so I was expecting a finished product. When an author keeps
tweaking a book, well, that doesn't bode well in my eyes.
Second hiccup was
him letting me know, in Mid-April, that it was going into audio
production and had I had a chance to “look it over” yet . I only
got the book in the beginning of March and needed to work it into my
rotation.
So,
legal schmegal crap: The author gave me a copy of this book for an
honest review and boy howdy, is that what he's going to get.
Remember, he ASKED for this.
The Kingdom of
Tyrania was conquered by the Kingdom of Aavaria because the Aavarians
wanted control of the only supply of a special kind of wood that
could be turned into swords that would suck the life out of anyone
receiving even a small wound.
Faulk watched as
his Commander died in a duel to the Aavarian General and as his
homeland fell. Now, 3 years later, he's a mercenary for hire,
drowning his despair with drink. He meets up with a former fellow
soldier who specialized in assassination. This Kessler shows Faulk
some magic that only a specific tribe in the mountains are supposed
to be able to use. This tribe, the Lunarians, are dedicated to
pacifism. Kessler was taught by an exiled Lunarian and he begins
passing on his knowledge.
3 Lunarians are
sent to Tyrania to stop outsiders from using the symbol magic. This
will involve taking one of the users before the Lunarian's gods and
those gods severing all connections which will stop that user and all
users associated with the initial user.
Faulk goes with
them to ostensibly learn more magic, as he's unaware of the gods true
purpose. He ends up being stripped by the gods and then someone
reconnecting back to the magic using another form.
While this is
happening to Faulk, the Lunarian Exile has set in motion a chain of
events that leads to his ascension as Ruler of Tyrania. He makes one
of the magic trees grow using all of the stolen life force from the
magic blades.
The book ends with
Faulk and his Lunarian girlfriend, along with her ex, heading out to
explore Aavaria and the Lunarian Exile planning on worldwide conquest.
First off, the writing. In my recent
“Quote”
post, I posted just a tiny bit of the book. There were a handful
of instances of like awkwardness that had me guessing just what the
author meant. I'm not talking about story plots, but plain old
grammar use. You can find Editors who will look for and show you how
to fix those type of things. Sure, they cost money, but do you want
your book to be good? I talked to someone I know, who also has a BA
in English Lit, and she said the instances I showed her were what
she experiences when reading chinese novels translated by highschool
students.Dinged off a ½ star for those instances.
Second, the magic system. The way it was really introduced had me
going “That's a Brandon Sanderson Mistborn knockoff!”
Pushing and pulling against magic swords and daggers to move objects
or yourself? Vin!
Thankfully, it does go on to be a “little” more original, but the
way it was introduced really wasn't handled well. Problem is, later
things get messy again when Faulk gets cut off from the magic but
“magically” is able to reconnect using some other way. Terms are
thrown around but it made no sense to me. This happened near the end
of the book though so I was pretty much past caring if I had missed
something. Ding. There goes another ½ star.
The characters. I'm not sure if I was supposed to be rooting for
anyone, or just against the Aavarian overlords and then the Exiled
Lunarian. Faulk was this uber-sceptic with the philosophy of a 2nd
grader. The love interest, Yuweh, was this magical powerhouse but
then would turn around and be this incredibly naive and simple
“girl”. Purposeful or not, I didn't like either of them. At the
end, there is this semi-sex scene between them. Up to that point
Keene had kept things clean. But they are at a pool bathing together
and he describes their foreplay like an awkward 14 year old and then
ends with something like “and they laid down and made love”. Now,
don't get me wrong, I don't WANT to read erotica, or even
semi-graphic sex scenes. But it offends my completist sensibilities
that you'd clumsily yet graphically describe their foreplay but not
the actual act? Considering that nothing like this is described
earlier, its obviously put in to titillate the reader. But the only
people going to be titillated by such amateur descriptions are 14
year old boys. The rest of us are just going to roll our eyes. Ding, another ½ star.
There is a bunch of other stuff too, but really, isn't that enough?
I'm not getting paid as an Editor here.
So lets do the math, because nothing is sexier than a man in
suspendors and flannel shirt doing “math”.
3 Stars is my starting point.
Add 1 for getting me to read the book in the first place.
Subtract ½ for mucking around it with it AFTER it is already
published.
Subtract ½ for acting like an anxious man whose wife is pregnant
with their first child.
Subtract ½ for Awkwardness.
Subtract ½ for the magic system and Sandersonitis.
Subtract ½ for the terrible and just plain embarrassing foreplay
scene.
The grand total should be.....* calculator noises *
0.5!!!! Oh wait, no. Hold on. Carry the five, divide the 2, add the
1/2's. Dang this “new math”.
1.5 STARS FOR THE WIN!!! (Where is
Vanna when you really need her?)
All kidding aside, this wasn't the
worst book I've ever read, not even close. But it was barely
adequate with enough issues that I certainly won't be reading any
more by Keene. Between this and
Algorithm
of Power, I have also reaffirmed my decision about indies in
general.
★☆☆☆½
