Bookstooge's Reviews On the Road

Thursday, April 04, 2024

Hidden Death (The Shadow #14) 3.5Stars

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Title: Hidden Death
Series: The Shadow #14
Authors: Maxwell Grant
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Crime Fiction
Pages: 138
Words: 42K

Good enjoyable pulp. The Shadow has to take on the machinations of a dead genius who is apparently killing people from beyond the grave. At the same time, the police bring on an eminent psychologist because facts just aren’t enough apparently. And no surprise to anyone, said psychologist turns out to be a bad apple. Throw in a massive attack on the Shadow by the combined might of the lowlifes of the city and you have yourself a pretty good story.

I did notice how amateur everything is (except the Shadow and his procedures). The cops are like the Keystone Cops and I have to assume that is deliberate on the part of the author and not an actual reality of the times. Individually, some of the cops are pretty good, but overall, yeah, they are a mockery of law and order.

For a much more indepth and excited review, please visit Riders of Skaith’s “Review from 2020”.

★★★✬☆

From the Publisher

Murder of a Genius
When a mechanical genius is murdered at the moment of his greatest invention, THE SHADOW decodes a plan of linked deaths and traps a master killer in a bizarre and brilliant intrigue...

All of My “The Shadow” Reviews

Wednesday, April 03, 2024

Killer’s Wedge (87th Precinct) 3.5Stars

Title: Killer’s Wedge
Series: 87^th Precinct
Author: Ed McBain
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Crime Fiction
Pages: 100
Words: 45K

Wow, talk about a taut police procedural. The whole book takes place almost in one office and yet the tension never let up. A crazy lady comes into the police station to kill one of the officers and ends up taking a whole bunch of officers hostage as well as a prisoner and a pregnant lady.

Oh man. So, there was a perfect example of a character being totally stupid and ruining things for everyone. The prisoner is a hispanic lady who was picked up for knifing a gang leader. She’s fiery and angry and doesn’t let anyone tell her anything. She ends up hating on the crazy lady and you’d think they would be bitter enemies. BUT. Just as one of the police officers is about to make a successful move against the crazy lady, the prisoner interferes and has a chance to escape. However, she believes the crazy lady over the police officers, with predictable results of everyone still being held as hostages. I was so outraged that I just dropped my kindle on the bed spread and starting hollering out loud. Poor Mrs B had to listen to me for a solid 5minutes. The things wives have to put up with, hahahahahaa.

Cotton Hawes played a large part in the story, but thankfully, there was no sleeping around. I kept waiting for him to hit on the crazy lady though, just because.

Everything gets resolved in the end and we find out the nitroglycerin was real, not water like the police officers eventually gambled on it being. It made me laugh. KABOOM!!!

★★★✬☆

From the Publisher

Her name is death - and her name is Virginia Dodge. Virginia Dodge is determined to put a bullet through Steve Carella's brain, and she doesn't care if she has to kill all the boys in the 87th Precinct in the process. Armed with a gun and a bottle of nitro-glycerine she spends an afternoon terrorising Lieutenant Byrnes and his men with her clever little home-made bomb. Is there anything the boys at the 87th can do to save Carella or will this crazy broad achieve her goal ¿? In one of the most dazzling novellas of the Precinct, Ed McBain exposes the dangerous loyalties that keep the boys of the 87th together, and threaten to tear them apart at the same time.

All My “87^th Precinct” Reviews

Tuesday, April 02, 2024

Drop Shot (Myron Bolitar #2) 1Star

Title: Drop Shot
Series: Myron Bolitar #2
Author: Harlan Coben
Rating: 1 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fiction
Pages: 252
Words: 77K

Sigh, not the way I wanted to start the month’s reading. First, I won’t be continuing this series or reading any more by this author. For the usual immoral reasons, sigh. It was so flipping checkmark too. Then you had an almost rape scene. While I acknowledge that bad men do very bad things, bringing it into fiction as “entertainment” isn’t right. Finally, Myron lets a murderer kill herself to cover up what she did because she’s the mother of his big client and it would destroy his client and he (Bolitar) would lose all the money from being his agent. There are times I can see letting someone get away with murder, I really can. But not for a base motive like money. So all those things coming together made this a very unpleasant read.

★☆☆☆☆

From Wikipedia

A young woman is shot in cold blood, her lifeless body dumped outside the stadium at the height of the US Open. At one point, her tennis career had skyrocketed. Now headlines were being made by a different young player from the wrong side of the tracks.

When Myron Bolitar investigates the killing, he uncovers a connection between the two players and a six-year-old murder at an exclusive club. Suddenly, Myron is in over his head. And with a dirty senator, a jealous mother, and the mob all drawn into the case, he finds himself playing the most dangerous game of all.

All My “Harlan Coben” Reviews

Saturday, March 30, 2024

Red War (Mitch Rapp #17) 3Stars

Title: Red War
Series: Mitch Rapp #17
Author: Vince Flynn & Kyle Mills
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Thriller
Pages: 316
Words: 96K

On his author page for the book, Kyle Mills shows how his speculation about powerful world leaders and specifically Putin, formed the basis for this book. Published in 2018, it was very prescient of how Russia would act in the coming years. Thankfully for us, Russia chose to invade Ukraine instead of starting World War III by invading some NATO countries. So I consider this book alternate future history.

At the same time, it was very uncomfortable as we know how the conflict actually has turned out and there is no super action hero to save the day. Men like Mitch Rapp are purely fictional, unfortunately. I’d have much preferred a truly fictional story for a truly fictional character. War is only enjoyable to read about if you know what is happening isn’t real, can’t be real and never will be real. Once it takes a turn into the possible, then you are forced to deal with the horrors of real war.

It was a great action story. With the retired assassin Azarov being forced out of retirement and working alongside Rapp, the dynamics were great. I was able to put aside my dislike of Mills’ handling of Rapp as a purely action hero’y kind of guy and just let the story carry me along, like I had just jumped out of an airplane for a HALO insertion.

And I just landed in your back yard. And killed you. With my nuclear bazooka. So I win! Just like I did when I read this book.

★★★☆☆

From Kylemills.com

When Russian president Maxim Krupin discovers that he has inoperable brain cancer, he’s determined to cling to power. His first task is to kill or imprison any of his countrymen who can threaten him. Soon, though, his illness becomes serious enough to require a more dramatic diversion—war with the West.

Upon learning of Krupin’s condition, CIA director Irene Kennedy understands that the US is facing an opponent who has nothing to lose. The only way to avoid a confrontation that could leave millions dead is to send Mitch Rapp to Russia under impossibly dangerous orders. With the Kremlin’s entire security apparatus hunting him, he must find and kill a man many have deemed the most powerful in the world.

Success means averting a war that could consume all of Europe. But if his mission is discovered, Rapp will plunge Russia and America into a conflict that neither will survive.

All My “Mitch Rapp” Reviews

Thursday, March 28, 2024

Spies! (Groo the Wanderer #27) 3.5Stars

Title: Spies!
Series: Groo the Wanderer #27
Author: Sergio Aragones
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 23
Words: 2K

I don’t know why I keep “reviewing” these. Mainly to keep track I guess. I mean, these are regularly funny. Every time I read one I enjoy myself. How many ways can I say “I enjoyed this funny comic because Groo is an idiot”. So far, I’ve said it 27 times. I guess that’s enough. I think after this I’ll just start using this “review” place to talk about whatever is on my mind at the time. So be prepared to be wowed and amazed as I pontificate on matters most important.

★★★✬☆

From Bookstooge.blog

The Minstrel and the Sage are captured as spies and they tell a couple of stories about Groo as a spy to fend off their deaths. Groo is in the camp and when everyone starts making fun of him he attacks them. Minstrel and Sage use the chaos to escape and the issue ends with Groo furiously attacking everyone.

All of My “Groo the Wanderer” Reviews

Tuesday, March 26, 2024

Portraits of Murder 4Stars

Title: Portraits of Murder
Series: ----------
Editor: Alfred Hitchcock
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Crime Fiction
Pages: 607
Words: 241K

This is the final Alfred Hitchcock collection that I have access to. After this, I have several of the issues of the new magazine. So it seems fitting to end this reading journey, which started in 2021 with “Death Mate”, with a gigantic collection (it is over 600 pages after all) of murder, almost murder and revenge.

Of the 47 stories, I found that only 2 or 3 were repeats and they were good enough that I didn’t mind reading them again. This kept me occupied for almost a week, as I would just dip my toes into its pages each night until I was tired enough to go to sleep. That’s a great way to read a collection of short stories.

The final 10 or so stories dealt with the supernatural. There was a clear demarcation up to that point. Everything up to then had been plain old people doing dirty or being done dirty. Then suddenly things got all supernatural. It was kind of jarring, as it felt like a completely different collection. Murder was still the main dish, but suddenly the menu with all the sides had changed, dramatically. It was like I went from having the option of ordering loaded baked potatoes, cheese sticks or onion rings to carrot sticks, apple slices or plain yoghurt. And that is why this collection was 4stars and not more. It was too much of a change for me to comfortably enjoy.

★★★★☆

Table of Contents:

EDWARD D. HOCH—Shattered Rainbow

DONALD HONIG—Wonderful, Wonderful Violence

LAWRENCE BLOCK—The Most Unusual Snatch

NEDRA TYRE—A Murder Is Arranged

HENRY SLESAR—The Poisoned Pawn

DON TOTHE—The Lifesaver

JACK RITCHIE—What Frightened You, Fred?

HAROLD Q. MASUR—Doctor’s Dilemma

CLARK HOWARD—Money To Burn

BABS H. DEAL—The House Guest

WILLIAM LINK and RICHARD LEVINSON—The Man in the Lobby

LAWRENCE TREAT—Family Code

WILLIAM BANKIER—To Kill an Angel

PAULINE C. SMITH—That Monday Night

CHARLES W. RUNYON—The Waiting Room

CLARK HOWARD—The Keeper

BILL PRONZINI—The Jade Figurine

REYNOLD JUNKER—The Volunteers

EDWARD D. HOCH—Arbiter of Uncertainties

FLETCHER FLORA—Variations on an Episode

ED LACY—Finders-Killers

W. E. DAN ROSS—The Pearls of Li Pong

MICHAEL COLLINS—Who?

STANLEY ABBOTT—A Quiet Backwater

PHIL DAVIS—Murder, Anyone?

WILLIAM JEFFREY—The Island

HAL ELLSON—Room to Let

AL NUSSBAUM—The One Who Got Away

BRYCE WALTON—Unidentified and Dead

EDWIN P. HICKS—The Lure and the Clue

BORDEN DEAL—The Big Bajoor

JACK RITCHIE—The Operator

DONALD OLSON—The Souvenir

NANCY SCHACHTERLE—Speak Well for the Dead

JONATHAN CRAIG—The Girl in Gold

DONALD HONIG—Minutes of Terror

ARTHUR PORGES—Puddle

LAWRENCE BLOCK—When This Man Dies

ELIJAH ELLIS—Public Office

MARGARET B. MARON—The Beast Within

C. B. GILFORD—Murder in Mind

ARTHUR PORGES—The Invisible Tomb

JAMES H. SCHMITZ—Just Curious

HENRY SLESAR—The Girl Who Found Things

CLAYTON MATTHEWS—Death Trance

GEORGE C. CHESBRO—The Healer

PATRICK O’KEEFFE—Murder by Dream

All of My “Alfred Hitchcock” Reviews

Saturday, March 23, 2024

Might As Well Be Dead (Nero Wolfe #27) 4Stars

Title: Might As Well Be Dead
Series: Nero Wolfe #27
Author: Rex Stout
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 179
Words: 59K

I enjoyed this. That about sums it up. Go read the synopsis and save yourself the trouble. Because you’re not good enough to truly appreciate a Nero Wolfe mystery, not like “I” appreciate them...

★★★★☆

From Wikipedia:

As the book opens, James R. Herold, prosperous businessman from Omaha, Nebraska, consults Wolfe about re-establishing contact with his son, whom he had (as it eventually transpired) falsely accused of theft eleven years before. The son, Paul Herold, had consequently broken almost all ties with the family, changed his name and moved to New York City. Even the latter meagre information was only known because Paul has recently sent his sister a birthday card postmarked NYC. The father has already taken obvious steps such as an ad in the newspaper and consulting the Missing Persons Dept of NYPD.

Although the present name of Paul Herold is unknown, Wolfe suspects that he has at least retained the same initials, and therefore places an advertisement in the newspapers the following day advising PH that he is innocent of the crime of which he was once suspected.

Needless to day, more than one person with those initials thinks he his falsely accused of a crime, and the advertisement attracts many telephone calls to Wolfe's office the next day.

The advertisement is also silent about the crime of which the man is innocent.

Meanwhile, a man known as Peter Hays has been on trial for murder, and the case is already with the jury, and a verdict is expected soon. Wolfe and Archie Goodwin are sufficiently distracted by enquiries about Peter Hays being the man named in the advertisement (and that he is by implication innocent of the murder for which Hays is currently being tried) that Wolfe dispatches Archie to visit the court room to hear the verdict against Hays. By comparing the man he sees in court to photos supplied by the father, Archie tentatively identifies the two names as referring to the same man.

This sets up a confrontation with Hays' attorney, Albert Freyer, who suspects Archie of duplicity (since Archie earlier told Freyer, among others, that the advertisement referred to a different crime, not the murder of Michael Molloy for which Hays has just been tried), but Wolfe and Freyer, after some discussion, quickly come to an agreement on how to proceed to the best advantage of all concerned:

Although Wolfe might collect a substantial fee by immediately notifying his client that his son has been found (albeit in mortal jeopardy), Archie's identification is still not certain, and Wolfe's client would be more satisfied if he was able to deliver the son as a free man.
Peter Hays has refused to give his lawyer any information on his background, something that counted against him with the district attorney, and seems depressed to the point of hopelessness, using the novel's title Might as well be dead to describe how he feels. This tends to validate Archie's tentative identification, but a personal meeting of Archie with Hays would be needed to be sure.
Peter Hays has limited funds, and although Freyer is convinced of his client's innocence, it would be vastly preferable to have help both in the form of Wolfe's assistance and the financial backing of the father.
Therefore, Freyer will start an appeal (initial steps are not costly) and meanwhile Wolfe will work on clearing Hays/Herold, and delay informing Wolfe's client for the time being.

Later on, Wolfe sends some of his operatives, including Johnny Keems, to investigate some of the friends and associates of Michael Molloy. The next day, the body of Johnny Keems is found killed by a hit-and-run driver. Since his pockets lack $100 in money Archie gave him to bribe potential witnesses, Wolfe and Archie consider it to be linked the Molloy murder, but the authorities make no such connection since the apparent murderer of Molloy has already been convicted. But as more persons connected to Molloy are found dead, Wolfe and Archie must find the evidence to free Hays before the murderer, now no more than a maniac, can eliminate everyone who might expose the truth.

All My “Nero Wolfe” Reviews

Thursday, March 21, 2024

Cthulhu Cymraeg (Cthulhu Anthology #16) 3Stars

Title: Cthulhu Cymraeg
Series: Cthulhu Anthology #16
Editor: Mark Jones (ed)
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Cosmic Horror
Pages: 127
Words: 47K

I had my fears about this collection, as it had a forward by ST Joshi, a so-called “authority” on the Cthulhu mythos. I say “so called” not because he doesn’t know his stuff, but because the Cthulhu mythos isn’t worthy of anyone spending as much time on it as Joshi has. It’s like studying a pile of poop and then calling yourself an authority on poop in your backyard. You can do it, but it’s a complete waste of time and talent. And then if you have the ego that Joshi apparently has, you expect “respect” for being an “authority”. What I’d like to do is kick his teeth in. But all I’ve got is this stupid blog that is being destroyed by the company hosting it. Isn’t that right Wordpress.com? I’d like to kick their teeth in too.

Other than that generalized expression of violence, I should be done now.

So, Joshi’s introduction didn’t mean this was a skank collection of wanktards writing out of their asses, like most of the stuff headed by Joshi. I’m guessing that’s because Jones was the editor. On the flip side, he included some really wacked out stories, ones that were supposed to be humorous, but in that bizarro way that’s not actually amusing. Then it would rocket over to the more typical cosmic horror’y side of things with death, despair and violence.

That schizophrenic approach is why this only got 3stars and not any more. It wasn’t a bad collection but it wasn’t a very good collection either. And that’s how I’m going to end this review.

★★★☆☆

Table of Contents:

FOREWORD
S. T. Joshi
INTRODUCTION
Mark Howard Jones & Steve Upham
WHAT OTHERS HEAR
John Llewellyn Probert
THE BICYCLE-CENTAUR
Rhys Hughes
THE CAWL OF CTHULHU
Bob Lock
PILGRIMAGE
Mark Howard Jones
SONG OF SUMMONING
Brian Willis
THE NECRONOMICON
Charles Black
UN-DHU-MILHUK WOULD (IF HE COULD)
Liam Davies
PERIPHERY
Paul Lewis
STRANGER CROSSINGS
Adrian Chamberlin

All of My “Cthulhu Anthology” Reviews

Tuesday, March 19, 2024

Mort (Discworld #4) 4Stars

Title: Mort
Series: Discworld #4
Author: Terry Pratchett
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 265
Words: 73K

This was my 3^rd time reading this. And I once again bumped it up half a star. So another 8 years and I suspect I’ll be bumping it up again, hahahahaa :-)

In this, we are introduced to yet another sub-series (or set of characters) in the Discworld. This time it is Death. Death takes on an apprentice who royally messes things up and in the end Death fixes it all.

Death is a jolly good fellow. Definitely shows what Pratchett’s thoughts on THAT matter were (if his suicide wasn’t enough to convince you). It works for a light and fluffy fantasy series. Which is all this is. Except it isn’t. Does that make sense? Pratchett is not trying to have his cake and eat it too with the Discworld series, he IS having his eat and eating it. He gets to tell funny stories AND he gets to spout off his own personal philosophies. It doesn’t get much better than that for an author.

Thankfully, as a reader, I too can pick and choose whether I want to read this lightly or seriously. If I had been in grumpy mood I would have read this seriously and taken Pratchett’s points about death apart one by one, showing that his ideas were nothing but an illogical mishmash of every other religions’ ideas on death and how he contradicted himself at every turn. But I was in a good mood so I just ignored all that and enjoyed Mort making a complete hash out of being Death’s apprentice.

Hash can be good, especially with beets. That’s called Red Flannel Hash here in New England. A can of corned beef hash, a can of purple beets, a frying pan and voila, a delicious meal that is healthy because obviously the beets are vegetables and so that outweighs all the fat from the corn beef hash.

In ending, you should read this book if for no other reason than I said so and that it will be the literary equivalent of adding some beets to your corn beef hash reading diet.

★★★★☆

From Wikipedia.org

As a teenager, Mort has a personality and temperament that makes him unsuited to the family farming business. Mort's father Lezek takes him to a local hiring fair in the hope that Mort will land an apprenticeship; not only would this provide a job for his son, but it would also make his son's propensity for thinking someone else's problem. Just before the last stroke of midnight, Death arrives and takes Mort on as an apprentice (though his father thinks he has been apprenticed to an undertaker). Death takes Mort to his domain, where he meets Death's elderly manservant Albert, and his adopted daughter Ysabell. Mort later accompanies Death as he travels to collect the soul of the King of Sto Lat, who is due to be assassinated by the scheming Duke of Sto Helit. After Mort unsuccessfully tries to prevent the assassination, Death warns him that all deaths are predetermined, and that he cannot interfere with fate.

Later on, Death assigns Mort to collect the soul of Princess Keli, daughter of the murdered king, but he instead kills the assassin the Duke had sent after her. Keli lives, but shortly after the assassin's death people begin acting as if something had happened without knowing why, namely what would be funeral preparations and acts of mourning. She soon finds that the rest of the world no longer acknowledges her existence at all unless she confronts them and even then only in a confused manner which is forgotten immediately after. She subsequently employs the wizard Igneous Cutwell, who is able to see her as he is trained to see things that are invisible to normal people (like death) to make her existence clear to the public. Mort eventually discovers that his actions have created an alternate reality in which Keli lives, but he also learns that it is being overridden by the original reality and will eventually cease to exist, killing Keli. While consulting Cutwell, Mort sees a picture of Unseen University's founder, Alberto Malich, noting that he bears a resemblance to Albert.

Mort and Ysabell travel into the Stack, a library in Death's domain that holds the biographies of everyone who has ever lived, in order to investigate Albert, eventually discovering that he is indeed Malich. They further learn that Malich had feared monsters waiting for him in the afterlife, and performed a reversed version of the Rite of AshkEnte in the hope of keeping Death away from him. However, the spell backfired and sent him to Death's side, where he has remained in order to put off his demise. During this time, Death, yearning to relish what being human is like, travels to Ankh-Morpork to indulge in new experiences, including getting drunk, dancing, gambling and finding a job. Mort in turn starts to become more like Death, adopting his mannerisms and aspects of his personality, while his own is slowly overridden.

Death's absence forces Mort to collect the next two souls, who are both located on separate parts of the Disc (in the Agatean Empire and Tsort, respectively), and due to die on the same night that the alternate reality will be destroyed. Before he and Ysabell leave to collect the souls, Mort uses the part of Death within him to force Albert to provide a spell that will slow down the alternate reality's destruction. After Mort and Ysabell leave, Albert returns to Unseen University, under the identity of Malich. His eagerness to live on the Disc is reinvigorated during this time, and he has the wizards perform the Rite of AshkEnte in the hope of finally escaping Death's grasp. The ritual summons both Death and the part of Death that had been taking Mort over, restoring him to normal. Unaware of Albert's treachery, Death takes him back into his service, the Librarian preventing the wizard's escape.

Mort and Ysabell travel to Keli's palace, where the princess and Cutwell have organised a hasty coronation ceremony in the hope that Keli can be crowned queen before the alternate reality is destroyed. With the reality now too small for Albert's spell, Mort and Ysabell save Keli and Cutwell from being destroyed with the alternate reality. They return to Death's domain to find a furious Death waiting for them, the latter having learned of Mort's actions from Albert. Death dismisses Mort and attempts to take the souls of Keli and Cutwell, but Mort challenges him to a duel for them. Though Death eventually wins the duel, he spares Mort's life and sends him back to the Disc.

Death convinces the gods to change the original reality so that Keli rules in place of the Duke, who was inadvertently killed during Death and Mort's duel due to the destruction of his lifetimer. Mort and Ysabell – who have fallen in love over the course of the story – get married, and are made Duke and Duchess of Sto Helit by Keli, while Cutwell is made the Master of the Queen's Bedchamber. Death attends Mort and Ysabell's wedding reception, where he warns Mort that he will have to make sure that the original Duke's destiny is fulfilled, and presents him with the alternate reality he created, now shrunk to the size of a large pearl, before the two part on amicable terms.

Sunday, March 17, 2024

Lives of Christopher Chant (Chrestomanci #4) 5Stars

Title: Lives of Christopher Chant
Series: Chrestomanci #4
Author: Diana Jones
Rating: 5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Middlegrade Fantasy
Pages: 241
Words: 88K

Now why can’t DWJ have written the rest of the Chrestomanci books like this one? This was fun, engaging, lively, with just the right amount of drama and even the badguys weren’t unpleasant jerks. They were just bad. Here’s a longer quote from the book that encapsulates the “feel” of the book.

“The trouble was, school had also taught him that girls were a Complete Mystery and quite different from boys. He had no idea what books girls liked. He was forced to consult Oneir, who had an older sister.

“All sorts of slush,” Oneir said, shrugging. “I can’t remember what.”

“Then could you come down to the bookshop with me and see if you can see some of them?” Christopher asked.

“I might,” Oneir agreed. “What’s in it for me?”

“I’ll do your geometry tonight as well as your algebra,” Christopher said.

On this understanding, Oneir went down to the bookshop with Christopher in the space between lessons and tea. There he almost immediately picked out The Arabian Nights (Unexpurgated). “This one’s good,” he said. He followed it with something called Little Tanya and the Fairies, which Christopher took one look at and put hastily back on the shelf. “I know my sister’s read that one,” Oneir said, rather injured. “Who’s the girl you want it for?”

“She’s about the same age as us,” Christopher said and, since Oneir was looking at him for a further explanation and he was fairly sure Oneir was not going to believe in someone called the Goddess, he added, “I’ve got this cousin called Caroline.” This was quite true. Mama had once shown him a studio photo of his cousin, all lace and curls. Oneir was not to know that this had nothing whatsoever to do with the sentence that had gone before.

“Wait a sec then,” Oneir said, “and I’ll see if I can spot some of the real slush.” He wandered on along the shelf, leaving Christopher to flip through The Arabian Nights. It did look good, Christopher thought. Unfortunately he could see from the pictures that it was all about somewhere very like the Goddess’s own Anywhere. He suspected the Goddess would call it educational. “Ah, here we are! This is sure-fire slush!” Oneir called, pointing to a whole row of books. “These Millie books. Our house is full of the things.”

Millie Goes to School, Christopher read, Millie of Lowood House, Millie Plays the Game. He picked up one called Millie’s Finest Hour. It had some very brightly colored schoolgirls on the front and in small print: “Another moral and uplifting story about your favorite schoolgirl. You will weep with Millie, rejoice with Millie, and meet all your friends from Lowood House School again . . .”

“Does your sister really like these?” he asked incredulously.

“Wallows in them,” said Oneir. “She reads them over and over again and cries every time.”

Though this seemed a funny way to enjoy a book, Christopher was sure Oneir knew best. The books were two and sixpence each. Christopher chose out the first five, up to Millie in the Upper Fourth, and bought The Arabian Nights for himself with the rest of the money. After all, it was his gold sovereign.”
~page 65

I laughed my head off at that. And rest of the book had that fun tone as well. Yes, there was some really dangerous things going on and Christopher wasn’t in the best of circumstances and he doesn’t always act like a good boy, but the thrust of the novel was all that was good instead of focusing on the unpleasant and nasty, as was done in Witch Week. This is what I want from a middle grade story.

I think it helped that Christopher is going to be the next Chrestomanci and how it turns his world upside down and inside out. Chrestomanci, as a position, is front and center and you can see how the responsibility of it weighs down on both the young and the old. But nonetheless, each bearer takes it up at the proper time and does their duty. Ahhhh, that’s good stuff! Responsibility, putting others above your own self, protecting the weak and helpless, facing down evil, people NEED that in their fiction, especially nowadays. And kids? It’s essential, sigh.

Anyway, this was the best Chrestomanci book so far and it showed just what a splendid writer DWJ could be when she wanted. Highly recommended.

★★★★★

From Wikipedia:

The novel tells the story of Christopher Chant's childhood in a magic filled Victorian style era. Although both of his parents are powerful practitioners of magic, the two are constantly at loggerheads; his father (an enchanter, the strongest type of magic-user) is entirely devoted to his work, to such a degree that the young Christopher is afraid that he would not recognise him should the two meet in public. On the other hand, his mother (a sorceress, the second-strongest type of magic-user) is a social climber, and is apparently only married to his father for his social connections. Christopher finds solace in his uncle Ralph, but due to his travelling job they rarely see each other.

The only escape that Christopher has is through his dreams, in which he is able to escape to other worlds. While he is not the only person with this ability, seemingly no one is able to do it so easily as he. Christopher is able to bring items with him into the real world, and after one of his many nannies discovers his hoard of items and accuses him of stealing, he tells Uncle Ralph of his power. Uncle Ralph is intrigued by this and has Christopher go on a 'test' to see what he can bring back. In the place between worlds, which takes the form of a valley, Christopher meets Tacroy who is supposed to guide him on his uncle's orders, however the two discover that whilst Tacroy is projecting his mind there Christopher is physically going into the other worlds; something which is impossible.

Christopher and Tacroy go on several of these trips, and on one to World 10 they get separated. Christopher meets 'The Living Asheth' a girl his age who is a vessel for Asheth, the Goddess of her world. He makes a deal with her for one of her magic temple cats, Throgmorten, but as she helps him escape he is speared by one of her many guards. After waking up in his bed with Throgmorten, Christopher accidentally causes a curtain rod to fall down and spear him through the heart, although he survives. This experience prompts his parents to send him to a boarding school where Christopher forgets to travel in his dreams because he enjoys it so much. Several ordinary months go by and Christopher decides to become a professional cricketer whilst his parents divorce. His friend accidentally hits him in the head with a cricket back, killing him. He wakes up confused in the morgue, where he then falls asleep in the hospital. The current Chrestomanci named Gabriel De Witt visits him, but disbelieves claims of him being an enchanter. Christopher's father takes Christopher to several witches and discovers that a silver coin Ralph insisted he always carry on him was stopping him from doing magic.

Chrestomanci realises Christopher is a nine-lived enchanter and brings him to his castle to train to be the next Chrestomanci. He absolutely hates living there and disobeys all of the rules even actively going against them. He returns to travelling with Tacroy for his uncle and returns the deal with The Living Asheth; giving her a series of books about a girl named Millie at boarding school. The two become close friends and she insists he call her Millie instead. Christopher dies multiple times during these trips and always wakes up in his own world only to die in freak accidents similar to the prior ones. Millie discovers that when she grows to old for Asheth to use her she is going to be sacrificed to her. Christopher sacrifices one of his lives so that Millie can travel to his own world to hide.

Christopher discovers that Chrestomanci is investigating a smuggler named 'The Wraith' who somehow manages to bring illegal items from other worlds. Chrestomanci reveals to every person in the castle that their close friend Mordecai Roberts was working for the Wraith, and Christopher is shocked to find Mordecai is actually Tacroy. Tacroy pretends not to know Christopher and reveals to him that his uncle is the Wraith. Ralph manages to kill Chrestomanci by taking his lives and scattering them across worlds so nobody could find him. Christopher uses Throgmorten to trap Ralph before Millie is able to subdue him. Millie discovers that Asheth is too vain to actually give a mortal girl magic and she is in reality one of the most powerful enchantresses in existence.

Learning that Mordecai is enchanted to work for Ralph, Christopher and Millie travel to world 11 which is a mysterious place that only has one timeline. Christopher and Millie are both able to outwit the ruler of World 11 and free Mordecai, who willingly becomes a servant of Chrestomanci. However, Christopher sacrifices another one of his lives. Christopher's parents reveal to him they are getting back together, but this time for love, and Christopher decides to continue living at the castle with the newly revived Chrestomanci and Millie. However, as Christopher attempts to travel he discovers he no longer can, as he only has two lives remaining.

- All of My “Diana Jones” Reviews