Bookstooge's Reviews On the Road

Thursday, March 09, 2023

Pigs Have Wings (Blandings Castle #9) ★★★★☆

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Title: Pigs Have Wings
Series: Blandings Castle #9
Authors: PG Wodehouse
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Humor
Pages: 176
Words: 70K

From Wikipedia:

Lord Emsworth, his brother Galahad and butler Beach, hearing that devious neighbour Sir Gregory Parsloe-Parsloe has done the unthinkable and brought in a new and enormous pig from Kent, are in turmoil. Galahad and Beach are desperate to secure their savings, confidently invested in a wager on the mighty Empress, while Emsworth is as ever suspicious of his gloating neighbour.

Parsloe, meanwhile, is regretting becoming engaged to Gloria Salt, who has put him on a diet. His suspicions of Galahad lead him to put his pig man, George Cyril Wellbeloved, on a drink-ban too, a move of which Wellbeloved wholeheartedly disapproves; he also, on Connie's advice, orders a large quantity of "Slimmo", a slimming product, to aid his diet. Hearing about this suspicious purchase, a worried Galahad calls in Beach's niece Maudie, an old acquaintance and now proprietor of a Detective Agency, to keep an eye on things.

Penelope Donaldson heads up to London for the day, planning to meet up with her man, under cover of a dinner with an old friend of her father's. Jerry Vail, however, is forced to entertain his old flame Gloria Salt and cancels the date. Salt tells him Emsworth needs a secretary, and suggests talking pig to the Earl will get him the cash he needs to buy into a health farm and make his fortune.

Vail heads to Blandings, but Connie is suspicious, having heard his name when he called to cancel his date with Penny. Penny is furious, having been taken to Mario's by Orlo Vosper and seen Jerry with the attractive Gloria. When Jerry explains, she is suitably chastised, especially as, thinking her man had betrayed her, she had accepted Vosper's proposal of marriage.

When Wellbeloved visits Blandings to ask Gally to provide him with a drink (all the pubs in Market Blandings having been forbidden to serve him), Gally takes the opportunity to snatch Parsloe's pig, stashing it in the hut in the West Wood. Wellbeloved, finding the pig gone, nabs the Empress and puts her in the pen at Parsloe's place to cover up.

Vosper and Gloria Salt, their old love revived, run off together to be married, after Gally helps Vosper get out of being engaged to Penny, and Gloria writes to Parsloe ending their engagement. Wellbeloved spots Beach furtively heading for the shed, but his call to tell Parsloe of his discovery is intercepted by Gally, who has Beach move the pig to a nearby house, recently vacated by Gally's old friend "Fruity" Biffen.

Meanwhile, Emsworth, stricken with a cold, has been smitten by Maudie (posing as Mr Donaldson's old friend Mrs Bunbury), and writes a letter to her declaring his love, which he has Vail place in her room. She, meanwhile, pays a visit to Parsloe, with whom she once had an understanding, planning to give him a piece of her mind, but all is soon cleared up and the two become engaged. Emsworth, on hearing this, sends Vail to retrieve his letter, but has misdirected him into Connie's room; on finding Vail hiding in her closet, she promptly fires him.

Finding the Emsworth Arms uncomfortable, Vail lets the cottage with the pig in it. Fearing he will give the game away, Gally dashes round, but Vail has already been visited by a policeman and Wellbeloved. Gally removes the pig by car, but soon returns, having found the Empress in the Queen's sty. They head back to Blandings to tell Emsworth, leaving Beach, exhausted from cycling over, sleeping in the cottage. On their return, Parsloe is there, having been told by Wellbeloved that the Queen was in the kitchen and had Beach arrested for stealing his pig.

Gally explains to Parsloe that the Empress is in the kitchen, and the Queen in her sty, scuppering Parsloe. He then persuades Emsworth to invest in Vail's health farm, in gratitude for having found the pig, and Connie gives him another £500 for Beach, to prevent him suing Parsloe for wrongful arrest. Meanwhile, Parsloe's butler Binstead, having been refused a refund on the Slimmo no longer needed by his master, feeds it to the pig in the sty, thinking she is still the Empress…

This was just the right book at the right time for me. I’m pretty sure this was not any funnier than the previous Blandings Castle stories, but I really needed something light, fluffy and downright stupid and that pretty much sums up Blandings Castle in a nutshell.

I mean, two rich guys biggest worry is whose pig is the fattest. How can you not laugh at that? :-D

★★★★☆

Groo and the Monks (Groo the Wanderer #15) ★★★✬☆

Title: Groo and the Monks
Series: Groo the Wanderer #15
Author: Sergio Aragones
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 23
Words: 2K

From Bookstooge.blog

Groo meets a battle taking place. He finally joins a side after they’ve won. But the winners are all going to commit ritual suicide for having killed their master and fellow brethren. Groo doesn’t want to die and so the last warrior tells him he can join a monastery to atone.

Groo finds the monastery and with predictable results. Chaos ensues. Silence is broken. Groo is kicked out to go earn money for them. He threatens the town until they give a lot of money. Groo then uses the money to carve a staircase into the mountain to the Monastery, hire belly dancers, buy wine and fine foods. Considering his duty done, he then leaves. Hahahahaa.

I think the following panel pretty much sums up this particular issue of Groo:

He doesn’t know what he is doing, or why, or even how, but because he’s Groo, he’s going to do it no matter what. Of course, apparently he can’t read any of the rules, or he’s just so dense that he doesn’t think they apply to him. It just goes to show that Groo causes chaos no matter where he goes or what he tries to do.

As much as I am really enjoying these, I think one a month is a great way to keep on liking Groo. Too much more and I’d probably get sick of his stupidity. Very funny in small doses, not so much in larger doses.

★★★✬☆

All of My “Groo the Wanderer” Reviews

Wednesday, March 08, 2023

Fullmetal Alchemist #3 ★★★☆☆

Title: Fullmetal Alchemist #3
Series: Fullmetal Alchemist
Author: Hiromu Arakawa
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Manga
Pages: 185
Words: 9K

Table of Contents & Backcover Synopsis:

Chapter 9: A Home with a Family Waiting

Chapter 10: The Philosopher's Stone

Chapter 11: The Two Guardians

Chapter 12: The Definition of Human

Bonus Chapter: The Military Festival

Synopsis:

Accompanied by their bodyguard, Alex Louis Armstrong, our heroes seek out their closest friend, mechanic Winry Rockbell, to fix their battered "auto-mail" bodyparts. Soon their quest for the Philosopher's Stone takes them to the great central library, where the Stone's formula may be hidden...if the mysterious figure named Lust doesn't get there first! But the secret of the Philosopher's Stone may be even more frightening than the beings who guard it.…

So Ed and Al continue their quest to track down the Philospher’s Stone only to realize that it takes human life to create one. With that, they now face a philosophical quandary. Can they in good conscience try to use one knowing the cost of it’s creation? They also have to deal with the fact that the military higher ups are involved in creating them. This leads them to an abandoned factory where they end up fighting some soul embedded beings like Al. And the volume ends with Lust confronting Edward

Truth be told, I wasn’t really feeling it while reading this. Not a bad volume per se but I wasn’t spellbound, nor was I glued to the pages. I actually watched Shrek in the background while perusing this and ended up enjoying that more. I don’t know what it is, but this just doesn’t keep my interest that much. I hope future volumes work better for me.

★★★☆☆

All My "Fullmetal Alchemist" Reviews

Tuesday, March 07, 2023

Pebble in the Sky (Galactic Empire #3) ★★★☆☆

Title: Pebble in the Sky
Series: Galactic Empire #3
Authors: Isaac Asimov
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 174
Words: 70K

From Wikipedia:

While walking down the street in Chicago, Joseph Schwartz, a retired tailor, is the unwitting victim of a nearby nuclear laboratory accident, by means of which he is instantaneously transported tens of thousands of years into the future (50,000 years, by one character's estimate, a figure later retconned by future Asimov works as a "mistake"). He finds himself in a place he does not recognize, and due to apparent changes in the spoken language that far into the future, he is unable to communicate with anyone. He wanders into a farm, and is taken in by the couple that lives there. They mistake him for a mentally deficient person, and they secretly offer him as a subject for an experimental procedure to increase his mental abilities. The procedure, which has killed several subjects, works in his case, and he finds that he can quickly learn to speak the current lingua franca. He also slowly realizes that the procedure has given him strong telepathic abilities, including the ability to project his thoughts to the point of killing or injuring a person.

The Earth, at this time, is seen by the rest of the Galactic Empire as a rebellious planet — it has rebelled three times in the past — and the inhabitants are widely frowned upon and discriminated against. Earth also has several large radioactive areas, although the cause is never really described. With large uninhabitable areas, it is a very poor planet, and anyone who is unable to work is legally required to be euthanized. The people of the Earth must also be executed when they reach the age of sixty, a procedure known as "The Sixty", with very few exceptions; mainly for people who have made significant contributions to society. That is a problem for Schwartz, who is now sixty-two years old.

The Earth is part of the Trantorian Galactic Empire, with a resident Procurator, who lives in a domed town in the high Himalayas and a Galactic military garrison, but in practice it is ruled by a group of Earth-centered "religious fanatics" who believe in the ultimate superiority of Earthlings. They have created a new, deadly supervirus that they plan to use to kill or subjugate the rest of the Empire, and to avenge themselves for the way their planet has been treated by the galaxy at large. Citizens of the Empire are unaware of Earth's lethal viruses, and mistakenly believe it is Earth's environment that causes them "Radiation Fever," and that Earthlings pose the Empire no threat.

Joseph Schwartz, along with Affret Shekt, the scientist who developed the new device that boosted Schwartz's mental powers, his daughter Pola Shekt, and a visiting archaeologist Bel Arvardan, are captured by the rebels, but they escape with the help of Schwartz's new mental abilities, and they are narrowly able to stop the plan to release the virus. Schwartz uses his mental abilities to provoke a pilot from the Imperial garrison into bombing the site where the arsenal of the super-virus exists.

The book ends on a hopeful note — perhaps the Empire can be persuaded to restore the Earth and reintroduce uncontaminated soil.

This was a much better book than the previous two Empire novels and thus I enjoyed it a bit more. Sadly, that still doesn’t mean it was a really good book. While it wasn’t frozen yoghurt, it was more akin to a McDonald’s softserve icecream, when what I was hoping for was some Haagen Daz.

I’ve got Asimov’s Fantastic Voyage duology available to me and I am still really waffling about if I want to read them or not. Based on these books, I really don’t expect much.

★★★☆☆

All of My “Galactic Empire” Reviews

Monday, March 06, 2023

The Darkest Day (Victor the Assassin #5) ★★★☆☆

Title: The Darkest Day
Series: Victor the Assassin #5
Authors: Tom Wood
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Action/Adventure
Pages: 293
Words: 90K

Ol’ Victorewsky is hired to whack an arms dealer. Only it turns into an ambush and Victor is almost killed by another assassin. The CIA operative who set up the original hit lets Victor know the other assassin is a rogue agent and one of the best. Victor sets out on her trail and in the process sets himself up as a dupe in a potential terrorist attack by the aforementioned CIA operative. Victor and Miss Assassin ally and take down a group of special forces who are going to use a dirty nuke in New York City. They give the evidence to Victor’s handler so everything is ship shape. Then Miss Assassin tries to hook up with Victor, because being an assassin is lonely business. And Victor kills her because she knows too much about him. Ohhhhhhh, snap!

I was enjoying the first part of this book immensely. Victor almost getting offed and realizing there is somebody else as good as him was great. But once he hits NYC and hooks up with Miss Assassin, it all went to the crapper. Most of that is because Victor gets chased through the city and the cops keep finding him. Now, that doesn’t sound so bad does it? BUT! There is a blackout. There is a massive rainstorm. Everybody is stuck on the road because of the blackout. And the flipping cops keep finding Victor like he’s the prize in a box of cracker jax. It was just too much for me. NYC, even just the part that is Manhattan Island, is too big and busy for cops to find one guy in those circumstances. It was like Woods was treating NYC like some little sleepy one street European town. While I avoid big cities, I’ve been in a couple (and never want to do it again if I can help it) and the thought of the cops being able to find me at the drop of a hat is just ludicrous.

So that really took down my enjoyment. A lot. To the point where I was thinking about giving this 2 stars. But then the ending redeemed it when Victor shows what an absolute psychopath loner he is. It made me say outloud, “Oh, that is BRUTAL!” But it was consistent with how he had lived his entire life and it wouldn’t have made sense at all for Victor to get romantically involved with another assassin who could identify him. This series has been consistently good and I am glad Wood (the author) didn’t skimp here and try to make Victor some sort of “relatable” guy. He’s a successful assassin, period.

★★★☆☆

All of My “Victor the Assassin” Reviews

Sunday, March 05, 2023

Curtains for Three (Nero Wolfe #18) ★★★★☆

Title: Curtains for Three
Series: Nero Wolfe #18
Author: Rex Stout
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars Appended to 4
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 149
Words: 70K

This is another collection of 3 novellas and consists of:
The Gun with Wings
Bullet for One
Disguise for Murder

While I enjoyed this collection, part of that was because I was determined to overlook the novella aspect and simply enjoy the stories for what they were instead of what I wanted them to be, ie full novels. So I dinged a half-star right out of the gate. Then the final story, Disguise for Murder, had appeared in a previous collection and while it was still a good story, I dinged a good star and a half off for wasting my precious time on old material when I wanted new stuff.

So still happy with this read but not as happy as I could have been if it was all new stuff. Of course, now I’ll actually pay attention to the names of the novellas as I suspect this will happen again. Can’t trust publishers not to make an easy buck by gypping their customers. Bunch of lowlifes. If I was Archie Goodwin I would bust their chops for doing such a thing to me.

Ahhh, the life of a book reader/reviewer isn’t for the faint of heart, that’s for sure. Thankfully, since I’m doing all the drama, you don’t have to. But feel free to chime in. So, if any of your “father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommates” had any drama too, let me know. I’m all about those family drama stories after all.

★★★☆☆ Appended to ★★★★☆

All My “Nero Wolfe” Reviews

Appended:

It turns out that I had read the story "Disguise for Murder" as "The Affair of the Twisted Scarf" in the Alfred Hitchcock Collection "I Want My Mummy" back in June of 22. Because I didn't pay enough attention to figure out what I had read when, I am un-penalizing this collection because it's my own fault. Thanks to Fraggle for setting me straight on this.

Friday, March 03, 2023

Blitz (Checquy Files #3) ★★☆☆☆

Title: Blitz
Series: Checquy Files #3
Author: Daniel O’Malley
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: Urban Fantasy
Pages: 622
Words: 250K

Long, bloated, two storylines that didn’t actually have any impact on each other and worst of all, boring. I was bored. The first storyline is dealing with London and World War II and the bombs being dropped on London. The second story involves a woman (who is married to a cop and has a daughter who is a toddler) who joins the Checquy because she can discharge electricity and it is in the present day.

I enjoyed the present day storyline. She was an engaging character with just the right amount of feistiness to keep me from rolling my eyes and she was SMART. She used her brains. Then I would just groan in spirit at the next chapter when we would go back to the stupid idiots who I was forced to read about during WWII. It was nothing more than a boring history info dump about the Checquy and I didn’t care two squats for it. Unfortunately, it seemed to play the bigger part and sucked the life from the entire book.

I actually feel rather generous giving this 2 stars. But it wasn’t bad, so I don’t feel like I can really go any lower. But I certainly won’t be reading any more in the Checquy Files if O’Malley writes any more. I hope he doesn’t because this was bad and I’m going to pretend The Rook and Stiletto are just a duology. Blitz has no business sullying the good literary name of the Checquy Files.

★★☆☆☆

Thursday, March 02, 2023

The Casebook of Sherlock Holmes (Sherlock Holmes #9) ★★★☆☆

Title: The Casebook of Sherlock Holmes
Series: Sherlock Holmes #9
Author: Arthur Doyle
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 309
Words: 84K

A bunch of short stories to round out and end the career of Sherlock Holmes. While nothing was really good, nothing was bad and I feel like this book sums up my overall experience with Holmes.

I’ve always thought I was strictly an idea guy when it came to stories and that the characters were simply meant as bones to hang the “idea” on. Well, reading Holmes has made me realize that I’ve changed and I like a good, fleshed out and relatable character. Holmes and Watson are none of those and so it makes it hard for me to enjoy these. Of course, it might just be the era that Doyle wrote in. Then I realize that Dickens didn’t write like this, at all, so I think it was all on Doyle. When I’m reading a collection of short stories like this, I don’t expect great characterization, but none of the previous novels have ever given that to me either, so I can’t even rely on that.

While I am glad to have finally read the entire Holmes canon, I don’t foresee myself ever wanting to re-read these. I want something more than they offer and I don’t think the future me is suddenly going to want that “lack” and thus desire to try these again :-D

★★★☆☆

All of my “Sherlock Holmes” reviews

Dreams (Bone #18) ★✬☆☆☆

Title: Dreams
Series: Bone #18
Author: Jeff Smith
Rating: 1.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 22
Words: 1K

From Bookstooge.blog

Thorn realizes that all of her dreams have been memories and gets all butt hurt at Gran’ma Ben for not telling her all these years. Gran’ma goes stubborn and won’t talk, Thorn goes all stubborn and won’t talk and Fone is stuck in the middle. Meanwhile, at the bar Lucius reveals the bet between him and Phoney and when things start going bad for Phoney, he wishes that Fone’s Dragon was there. This leads everyone to start questioning him, rather threateningly.

Finally, the various Bone characters start getting on track into one plot. With Phoney’s reveal to the town folk that he knows about a dragon, and Gran’ma Ben revealing Thorn’s history, everybody is about to be on the same page.

But you know what? Not. Quite. Yet. Because Smith is a bonehead and spends 3 pages showing us what should take a mere panel. There are several pages where he re-uses the same art but changes how an arm is resting or where a character is looking and we get about 10 words of text. It is beyond blatantly obvious that he is either puffing things up or is floundering and trying to give himself some operating space.

It is amazing to me seeing how a story, spaced out in monthly installments, shows such a markedly different set of weaknesses from the collected story. This is why I am not a fan of serial fiction either. Even if the author knows exactly where they are going, it is still a big pain in the butt to read on THEIR schedule and not mine. Maybe that had as much to do with me not reading a lot of comics as much any economic reasons.

Like I have stated before, I’m going to read this comic, issue by issue, even if it kills me. It just might too, hahahahahaa :-D

★✬☆☆☆

All My "Bone" Reviews

Wednesday, March 01, 2023

Uncle’s Dream (The Russians) ★★★✬☆

Title: Uncle’s Dream
Series: (The Russians)
Author: Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Translator: Garnett
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fiction
Pages: 183
Words: 49K

In so many ways this reminded me of the Mapp & Lucia series by EF Benson if there was only Lucia with a daughter. In this story, Mama is trying to get a rich match for her daughter and a rich, but old, sick and partly crazy, Prince is the target. The Mama has the entire village under her thumb and they chafe and so do what they can to upset the plans. And the daughter is horrified but goes along and the other, younger suitor, acts like an idiot and hurts the feelings of the daughter and thus extinguishes his own chances. Eventually, the Prince, thinking it is all a dream, escapes from the village and the Mama is a laughing stock and the daughter eventually marries some high ranking politician.

I guess this was a commentary on the people of the times. Of course, that’s not much different than the people of today. Selfish, back stabbing, irresponsible, greedy, etc, etc. Thankfully, Dostoyevsky uses humor so it’s not grim and horrible but by the time the story was done I was ready to leave that little Russian village.

★★★✬☆