Bookstooge's Reviews On the Road

Thursday, April 13, 2023

Cassilda’s Song (The King in Yellow Anthology #7) ★★★★☆

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Title: Cassilda’s Song
Series: The King in Yellow Anthology #7
Editor: Joseph Pulver
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Cosmic Horror
Pages: 241
Words: 92K

Table of Contents:

Introduction by Joseph S. Pulver, Sr.

Black Stars on Canvas, a Reproduction in Acrylic by Damien Angelica Walters

She Will Be Raised a Queen by E. Catherine Tobler

Yella by Nicole Cushing

Yellow Bird by Lynda E. Rucker

Exposure by Helen Marshall

Just Beyond Her Dreaming by Mercedes M. Yardley

In the Quad of Project 327 by Chesya Burke

Stones, Maybe by Ursula Pflug

Les Fleurs du Mal by Allyson Bird

While The Black Stars Burn by Lucy A. Snyder

Old Tsah-Hov by Anya Martin

The Neurastheniac by Selena Chambers

Dancing the Mask by Ann K. Schwader

Family by Maura McHugh

Pro Patria! by Nadia Bulkin

Her Beginning is Her End is Her Beginning by E. Catherine Tobler and Damien Angelica Walters

Grave-Worms by Molly Tanzer

Strange is the Night by S.P. Miskowski

Separator

This was a collection centered around the character of Cassilda, the former queen of Carcosa that the Yellow King subjugate/co-opted/seduced depending on which story you decide to hold to. In some of these stories she is fighting against the King in Yellow, other times the story is about her influence in our world and in some instances it’s just a feminist story wrapped in the liturgical wrappings of the King in Yellow.

I actually started to read this back in January, but with everything that was going on medically at the time, stories that dealt with despair and madness and hopelessness were way more than I could handle at that time. But now that we appear to be on the other side, I could dive into this cesspool with nary a shudder or twinge of disgust.

Two stories stood out to me. Not that they were the most enjoyable ones, but I felt like they encapsulated the best and worst of the King in Yellow mythology.

In the Quad of Project 327 was about a group of school kids who find the play The King in Yellow and one girl reads it. Unlike everyone else who has ever read it, it doesn’t drive her crazy but gives her psychic powers and she in turn gives these powers to the other kids. They use the power to make their Quad (apartment building area) a better place and to make their white male teacher hate Columbus and be a “nicer” guy. This exemplified the worst in my opinion. The author wrapped up her white male hatred and used some of the literary terms used in the King in Yellow stories. But she either didn’t understand or chose to ignore that the play has to drive people mad, or it isn’t The King in Yellow. As such, this didn’t have that hopeless, the walls are closing in, claustrophobic feel that a genuine KiY story should have. There is no hope, there is no betterment, there is no strength in a King in Yellow story. And if you choose to go outside of those bounds, then your story isn’t a KiY story. It wasn’t necessarily a bad story, but it was missing that downward punch that was needed.

Old Tsah-Hov was a story about a dog that ends up being owned by a woman named Cassilda, in Jerusalem. She adopts him as a stray and gets married and has a kid and then a war breaks out and her husband breaks under the strain and tries to hit her. The dog intervenes, only the son tries to stop him and the dog ends up biting the son by accident instead of the father. So he’s taken away to be put down. Once he’s put down, he awakens in Carcosa, where a mob is waiting for him, with hands filled with stones. To kill him. Again. Now THAT is how you tell a KiY story. The dog is loyal to Cassilda, loves the little boy and is doing his best to protect and serve. And his reward? To be killed again by the King in Yellow. The pure perversity of the entire situation, the twistedness of it, is exactly how a KiY story should be written.

Black Stars on Canvas, a Reproduction in Acrylic, the lead story, is a great KiY primer. If you can read that story and like it, The King in Yellow is for you. If you read it and don’t like it, or aren’t interested, I sincerely doubt you’ll like much else in the King in Yellow mythology. I’ve never been tempted to write a book, or even a short story, but if I ever did, it would be something to do with the King in Yellow.

The main reason I didn’t give this a 4 ½ rating was because one of the stories was poetry. Poetry is an essential element in the play The King in Yellow, but I don’t like poetry and I don’t have to.

I’ve included a large version of the cover as it is hard to see in the little one I include with most reviews.

★★★★☆

Wednesday, April 12, 2023

Tom (One Piece #37) ★★★☆☆

Title: Tom
Series: One Piece #37
Arc: Water Seven #6
Author: Eiichiro Oda
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Manga
Pages: 229
Words: 11K

From Wikipedia:

"Six Powers"

"Fighting Power"

"Ordinary Citizens"

"The Warehouse Under the Bridge"

"Klabautermann"

"Tom's Workers"

"The Legendary Shipwright"

"Sea Train"

"Spandam"

"Mr. Tom"

"Cutty Flam"

The Straw Hats arrive on the scene and find Robin with CP9. Although she claims to want nothing more to do with them, Luffy and company attack CP9 so that they can talk to her. They are quickly defeated, and CP9 departs to look for Franky. As the Aqua Laguna approaches, Franky has given Usopp and the Merry shelter. Soon enough CP9 arrives looking for Franky and his blueprints. Because his teacher, entrusted him with the blueprints years earlier, and forfeited his own life to insure Pluton never fell into the government's hands, Franky refuses to reveal their location.

INSERT SEPARATOR

The World Government wants the strongest ship and is willing do anything to get it. The showdown between CP9 and Luffy is so one sided that it’s not even funny. He gets tossed around like a broken rag doll. It was getting rather interesting when suddenly the last half of the volume is an extended flashback about 2 of the side characters who are linked to this power ship.

That was rather dull. It was the usual “wah, wah, we wanna be powerful and argue like kids” story about 2 boys growing up. I’m sure it gave world building fans an orgasm, but I want to read about Luffy and the Straw Hats and everyone else is incidental. I don’t need to know about side characters. The focus shouldn’t BE on side characters. As such, this little (big really, because it was close to 120 pages) flashback not only didn’t work for me, but it actively annoyed me. The flashback hadn’t finished up by the time this volume ended, so I already know I have to deal with it in the next volume. And I’m sure I’ll be finding out how Franky became a cyborg. Not that I care one bit.

I really did enjoy the parts with the Straw Hats. Usopp has an extended showing here where he talks to Franky about he knows the Merry Go (the ship) is doomed but that he can’t accept it and that’s why he keeps trying to repair her. I think Franky finally gets through to him but I obviously won’t know because of that flipping flashback! And Luffy and Zoro are totally beaten down but not dead, so how will that resolve? WE DON’T KNOW BECAUSE OF THAT FLIPPING FLASHBACK!!!

Yeah, not real happy with that half of the volume.

★★★☆☆

All My "One Piece" Reviews

Tuesday, April 11, 2023

Fantastic Voyage (Fantastic Voyage #1) ★★✬☆☆

Title: Fantastic Voyage
Series: Fantastic Voyage #1
Authors: Isaac Asimov
Rating: 2.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 195
Words: 69K

From Wikipedia:

The United States and the Soviet Union have both developed technology that can miniaturize matter by shrinking individual atoms, but only for one hour.

A scientist. Dr. Jan Benes, working behind the Iron Curtain, has figured out how to make the process work indefinitely. With the help of American intelligence agents, including agent Charles Grant, he escapes to the West and arrives in New York City, but an attempted assassination leaves him comatose with a blood clot in his brain that no surgery can remove from the outside.

To save his life, Grant, Navy pilot Captain Bill Owens, medical chief and circulatory specialist Dr. Michaels, surgeon Dr. Peter Duval, and his assistant Cora Peterson are placed aboard a Navy ichthyology submarine at the Combined Miniature Deterrent Forces facilities. The submarine, named Proteus, is then miniaturized to "about the size of a microbe", and injected into Benes' body. The team has 60 minutes to get to and remove the clot; after this, Proteus and its crew will begin reverting to their normal size, become vulnerable to Benes's immune system, and kill Benes.

The crew faces many obstacles during the mission. An undetected arteriovenous fistula forces them to detour through the heart, where cardiac arrest must be induced to, at best, reduce turbulence that would be strong enough to destroy Proteus. As the crew faces an unexplained loss of oxygen and must replenish their supply in the lungs, Grant finds the surgical laser needed to destroy the clot was damaged from the turbulence in the heart, as it was not fastened down as it had been before: this and his safety line snapping loose while the crew was refilling their air supply has Grant begin to suspect a saboteur is on the mission. The crew must cannibalize their wireless radio to repair the laser, cutting off all communication and guidance from the outside, although because the submarine is nuclear-powered, surgeons and technicians outside Benes's body are still able to track their movements via a radioactive tracer, allowing General Alan Carter and Colonel Donald Reid, the officers in charge of CMDF, to figure out the crew's strategies as they make their way through the body. The crew is then forced to pass through the inner ear, requiring all outside personnel to make no noise to prevent destructive shocks, but while the crew is removing reticular fibers clogging the submarine's vents and making the engines overheat, a fallen surgical tool causes the crew to be thrown about and Peterson is nearly killed by antibodies, but they are able to reboard the submarine in time. By the time they finally reach the clot, the crew has only six minutes remaining to operate and then exit the body.

Before the mission, Grant had been briefed that Duval was the prime suspect as a potential surgical assassin, but as the mission progresses, he instead begins to suspect Michaels. During the surgery, Dr. Michaels knocks out Owens and takes control of Proteus while the rest of the crew is outside for the operation. As Duval finishes removing the clot with the laser, Michaels tries to crash the submarine into the same area of Benes' brain to kill him. Grant fires the laser at the ship, causing it to veer away and crash, and Michaels to get trapped in the wreckage with the controls pinning him to the seat, which attracts the attention of white blood cells. While Grant saves Owens from the Proteus, Michaels is killed when a white blood cell consumes the ship. The remaining crew quickly swim to one of Benes' eyes and escape through a tear duct seconds before returning to normal size.

Separator

I went into this thinking it was an original story by Asimov that was later adapted to the 1966 Movie, Fantastic Voyage. Little did I know that the book was based on the screenplay and was just a novelization of the movie.

And it was all the stronger for it. Because Asimov can’t write a great novel to save his life. (considering that he’s dead, I’d say that’s a strong piece of evidence right there).

At the same time, this was boring as a vanilla fudgsicle made out of tap water. I can see this being a visually appealing movie, but as a book, it was just boring.

Asimov wasn’t happy with doing a novelization and decided to write his own book, which was later released as Fantastic Voyage II: Destination Brain. I will not be reading that however. This was boring enough and I can only imagine that a solo Asimov venture would only take a downward trajectory.

★★✬☆☆

All of My Asimov Reviews

Saturday, April 08, 2023

The Knight of the Swords (Eternal Champion: Corum #1) ★★★★★

Title: The Knight of the Swords
Series: Eternal Champion: Corum #1
Author: Michael Moorcock
Rating: 5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 147
Words: 52K

From Wikipedia.org/The_Swords_Trilogy

The Knight of the Swords is the first appearance of Corum, last survivor of the Vadhagh race. After his family is butchered by a group of Mabden (men) led by the savage Earl Glandyth-a-Krae, Corum tries to take revenge, but is captured instead; his hand is cut off and his eye put out before he escapes. He goes to Moidel's Castle, where he is taken in by a very different sort of Mabden, the Margravine Rhalina. Corum and Rhalina fall in love, but their romance is interrupted when Glandyth leads an assault on the castle. Rhalina uses sorcery (which Corum had never believed in) to summon a ship of the dead which drives off the barbarians. However the bargain required means that she must go with the ship's captain. Corum joins them and the ship takes them to the island of Shool, a near immortal and mad sorcerer who takes Rhalina hostage.

Shool trades Corum two artifacts to replace his lost hand and eye, the Hand of Kwll and the Eye of Rhynn. The Eye allows Corum to see into an undead netherworld; the Hand serves to summon the last beings killed by Corum, to fight for him. Shool explains that Corum's ill fortune has been caused by a Greater God, Arioch, one of the Sword Rulers. When Arioch and his fellow Chaos Lords conquered the Fifteen Planes, the balance between the forces of Law and Chaos tipped in favor of Chaos. Corum is sent to steal the Heart of Arioch, which will give the sorcerer power to become a great god himself. After an adventurous journey which teaches him more about the metaphysics of Chaos, Corum reaches Arioch's palace. There he finds the Heart, at which point Shool's unknowing role as an agent of Arioch is revealed. The Hand of Kwll crushes the heart, killing Arioch. Corum returns to the island to rescue Rhalina. As it turns out, Shool's powers were entirely of Arioch's gift, so he can no longer threaten Rhalina or Corum. The couple return to their home on Moidel's Mount.

It has been 23 years since I last read the Corum books by Moorcock. I have always meant to re-read them much sooner, but it always seemed that something else was pushing to the front of the line. Once again, they were a staple of my highschool and college days. Back then I read all 6 books in 2 collected omnibuses entitled Corum: The Coming of Chaos and Corum: The Prince with the Silver Hand. This time around I wanted to make sure to read each individual story so there would be as little blurring in my mind as possible.

This was great. The Vadhagh, the race that Corum belongs to, is very unlike the Melniboneans (of which the Eternal Champion aspect of Elric is a member) and thus their destruction was sad and melancholic instead of fiercely just. It makes Corum a much nicer protagonist and makes his fears and desires that much more relatable.

Having read this before, and several of the other Eternal Champion aspect series, I was familiar with the whole Cosmic Balance that Moorcock hangs everything on. Corum isn’t so much a rogue agent trying to do his own thing but is an unwitting agent of Law because he hates what Chaos has done (killed off his entire race!). As such, his adventures feel very much like he is a ball being batted back and forth without trying to forge his own path. While it can make the read feel a bit unsettling, it is also rather a comforting feeling because you know that Corum is as much along for the ride as the reader is.

My only quibble is the romance side of things. Corum has gone on for hundreds of years (I can’t remember if it ever says how old he is, but his father was close to 1000 when he was killed at the book’s beginning) without being interested in romance with another Vadhagh but suddenly, he’s shacking it up and risking his life for a human woman? It wasn’t that it rang false so much as it just felt very quick. Of course, in a story that is under 150, that is kind of to be expected I guess. Which is why it is only a quibble and not a real issue :-D

But for a sword and sorcery, it gave me everything I wanted. Corum gets his eye plucked out and his hand cut off. And then gets mystical items to replace them. Which allows him to call forth those he has killed from a kind of hell to fight on his behalf. He’s not a great swordsman OR magician, which ties into the idea of him being batted around. But as a reader we get our fill.

I am already looking forward to Corum’s next adventure as he battles the Queen of the Swords.

★★★★★

Corum: The Coming of Chaos Trilogy (2000 “Review”)

Friday, April 07, 2023

Things That Go Bump In The Night (Bone #19) ★★✬☆☆

Title: Things That Go Bump In The Night
Series: Bone #19
Author: Jeff Smith
Rating: 2.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 25
Words: 1K

From Bookstooge.blog

Phoney reveals that Fone Bone knows the dragon and everyone at the tavern starts telling tales and believing that the dragons are now an infestation and going to take over. Phoney uses this interest to upstage Lucius and to outsell him. The idiots at the tavern follow Phoney’s lead.

Ted the bug delivers a message to Gran’ma Ben that a huge rat army is on its way and that the kingdom that is supposed to keep them away isn’t doing anything about. She gathers up Fone and Thorn and they prepare to set out that night.

INSERT SEPARATOR

This was a big step up from the previous issue but almost anything had to be. It still wasn’t great or exciting and I don’t know how much more of Smith’s “change the direction of a single item and pretend it’s a new panel” I can take.

Then you have Phoney running his next scam, ie, riling up everyone about the dragons to sell more than Lucius. I realize that Smith is trying to make a point here, but my goodness, are the villagers dumb as rocks! They’ve known Lucius their whole lives and they’ve been cheated by Phoney on multiple occasions but who do they listen to? Phoney of course.

But I do wonder, why is Lucius so vociferous in denying that dragons even exist? He was stoking the flames of the villagers by denying what they said so hard. He was acting like a liberal democrat politician, ie, telling everyone else what they should believe, what they should be doing and only he, Lucius, could dispense such wisdom. There is obviously some reason Lucius is denying the existence of the dragons, but it would be nice as a reader to at least have a hint of that reason.

But by the end of this issue, I still felt that I’ll take Web of Spiderman ANY day over this.

★★✬☆☆

All My "Bone" Reviews

Thursday, April 06, 2023

A Time To Die (Victor the Assassin #6) ★★★✬☆

Title: A Time To Die
Series: Victor the Assassin #6
Authors: Tom Wood
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Action/Adventure
Pages: 316
Words: 100K

From Bookstooge.blog

Victor is now working for the British, since the CIA really doesn’t want someone who was implicated in trying to nuke New York City. His latest assignment is to erase an eastern european crime lord. In the process Victor tries to help a woman who’s been sold into prostitution. She dies, the crime lord dies and Victor kills the man who killed the woman. Then there’s the assassins who are trying to take the new bounty put out on Victor’s head by someone who has a LOT of details on him (well, one of his identities anyway). Victor goes mano-a-mano in a junk yard and emerges victorious by lying to his adversary and putting two bullets in him point blank.

Nobody lives happily ever after, hurray!

Separator

These are great books for what they are. Action packed adventures of an assassin with his own code of rules that he lives assiduously by. By this time though, he’s made enough enemies and somebody has sold his identity (well, one of them) so he’s not only trying to complete an almost impossible assignment for the British but he’s dodging assassins at the same time. I loved it.

At the same time, I wonder how many more books the author can stretch things out before Victor’s identity is irreparably compromised? While I have no problem with assassins constantly coming after Victor, there are only so many false identities he can burn through. For someone who needs to remain anonymous, every id burnt is another escape route now denied him. I feel like Victor is running down a hill with an avalanche right behind him. How long can he outrun it?

I don’t see him ever retiring and living his remaining days out on some sunlit beach with a cold drink in one hand and a gun in the other. He’s going work until he’s killed. Not exactly something to look forward to in the series but it fits with everything that has happened so far.

★★★✬☆

All of My “Victor the Assassin” Reviews

Wednesday, April 05, 2023

Fullmetal Alchemist #5 ★★★☆☆

Title: Fullmetal Alchemist #5
Series: Fullmetal Alchemist
Author: Hiromu Arakawa
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Manga
Pages: 190
Words: 9K

From FMA.fandom.com

Ed, Alphonse, and their mechanic Winry go south in search of Izumi Curtis, the master alchemist who taught the brothers how to use alchemy. But in the boomtown of Rush Valley, an encounter with a pickpocket turned them down a different path in search of an auto-mail blacksmith whose handiwork is the best that Winry has ever seen. Then the action flashes back to the past to show how Ed and Alphonse first learned alchemy..."

Chapters

Chapter 17: The Boomtown of the Broken Down

Chapter 18: The Value of Sincerity

Chapter 19: I'll Do It for You Guys!

Chapter 20: The Terror of the Teacher

Chapter 21: The Brothers' Secret

INSERT SEPARATOR

I have a feeling this series is going to run at the 3star rating more times than not. At least until I get into new territory where I don’t vaguely recall stuff from the first Fullmetal Alchemist anime.

There was nothing at all bad about this volume. But there was nothing that made me laugh. Or cry. Or get excited. Or mad. Or depressed. It just kind of rolled along. I know I’ll read the whole series, because I’ve never actually known the ending (the original anime was produced before the manga was ended, so they made up their own ending) and I want to know it. But I can’t say I’m super excited when this rolls around to read.

Eh, whatever. I’ll plug along.

★★★☆☆

All My "Fullmetal Alchemist" Reviews

Tuesday, April 04, 2023

Murder by the Book (Nero Wolfe #19) ★★★★✬

Title: Murder by the Book
Series: Nero Wolfe #19
Author: Rex Stout
Rating: 4.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 189
Words: 69K

From Wikipedia:

Inspector Cramer takes the unprecedented step of approaching Nero Wolfe for his help on a stalled murder investigation. Leonard Dykes, a clerk for a law partnership, was found dead in the East River. The police found in Dykes' apartment a list of men's names and Cramer wishes to have Wolfe's opinion on it. But other than suggesting Dykes may have been trying to invent an alias, Wolfe can't help.

A month later Wolfe, is approached by the father of Joan Wellman, a reader for a fiction publisher, who was killed in a hit-and-run incident, late at night in Van Cortlandt Park. After reading a recent letter that Joan had written to her parents, Wolfe realises that the name ‘Baird Archer’, an author whose novel Joan was reading for her employer, had also appeared on the list found in Leonard Dykes’ apartment.

Wolfe orders Archie Goodwin to explore the link between Archer's novel and the two murder victims. To that end, Archie arrives at the office of Rachel Abrams, a stenographer, mere minutes after she has been thrown out of a window to her death. In the moments before the police arrive Archie confirms that Baird Archer was one of her clients. Wolfe decides to begin the investigation with Dykes, and Archie arranges a meeting with the female employees of Corrigan, Phelps, Kustin and Briggs, the law partnership Dykes worked for. During the meeting, tempers flare and in a resulting argument the former senior partner of the firm, Conroy O’Malley, is mentioned. O’Malley was disbarred for bribing a jury foreman to fix a case, and while Dykes was blamed for exposing him to the Bar Association it becomes clear that all four of the partners have motives to betray him.

Soon after, the four lawyers—James Corrigan, Emmet Phelps, Louis Kustin and Frederick Briggs—approach Wolfe, keen to avoid further scandal. The men agree to send Wolfe all correspondence relating to Dykes, including a resignation letter he submitted. When they receive the letter, Wolfe and Archie discover an odd notation, apparently in Corrigan's handwriting, which corresponds a verse in the Book of Psalms. The same verse - “Put not your trust in princes, nor in the son of man, in whom there is no help” - was used for the title of Baird Archer's novel, which confirms to Wolfe that Archer was a pen name of Dykes and his novel a Roman à clef based on O'Malley's downfall.

Archie is dispatched to Los Angeles to persuade Dykes's sister Peggy to help them trap her brother's murderer. Archie writes a letter to the law firm purportedly from Peggy asking for advice over the legal rights of her brother's novel, and hires a local private detective to pose as a literary agent. Soon after, James Corrigan unsuccessfully tries to acquire the manuscript, resorting to violence and attempted theft in order to do so. Archie begins to tail Corrigan, but soon after his return to New York Wolfe receives a rambling phone call, apparently from James Corrigan, which is abruptly ended with the sound of a gunshot. The police discover that Corrigan has apparently committed suicide, and the next day Wolfe receives a suicide note written by Corrigan confessing to having exposed O’Malley and committed all three murders to keep his secret.

Although the authorities are willing to rule Corrigan the murderer and his death a suicide, Wolfe has a breakthrough and summons the major witnesses to his office. There, he reveals that the supposed suicide note was flawed in one crucial respect; it claimed that Corrigan was aware of the contents of Dykes’ novel, when in fact Corrigan's actions in Los Angeles clearly demonstrated that he had never seen the manuscript before. In fact, Corrigan was murdered by Conroy O’Malley, who had staged his death as a suicide. O’Malley had discovered that Corrigan had betrayed him via Dykes's manuscript and had committed the other murders both to frame Corrigan and cover up his actions. After holes in his alibi are discovered, O’Malley is charged and convicted of murder.

SEPARATOR

Ahhhhhhhh yeaaaaahhh. When Rex Stout wants to write, boy howdy can he write! This was like sinking back into the most comfortable couch imaginable with a big fluffy blanket and a mug of the most delicious hot chocolate ever. Nothing like the grime, grit and dirt from 87^th Precinct.

I loved every second of this. And what’s more, being about a book just put the cherry on top. Sure, several people die. Very nice people I’m sure. But I didn’t know them, their deaths weren’t described in gruesome detail and beyond a name and a clue placeholder, they didn’t force me into the nasty murder box. Comfortable crime, that’s what I’d call it.

It was also really nice to get back to a full length novel instead of 3 novellas. I know I harp on that a lot, but it makes a big difference to me. I realize also that Stout pretty much wrote on commission to earn a living so novellas would do that easier than full length novels. But by gum, full novels are where its at as far as pure enjoyment goes. * slams fist * And that’s final!

★★★★✬

All My “Nero Wolfe” Reviews

Monday, April 03, 2023

The Captain of the Monte Cristo ★☆☆☆☆

Title: The Captain of the Monte Cristo
Author: Sarah Wilson & John Gunningham
Rating: 1 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 147
Words: 41K

From the Publisher

Love, betrayal, and revenge ... in space.

Edmund Dante is a promising young officer in the Company, but when his loyalty to his ship's captain endangers the crew's future, his betrayal is inevitable. Years later, Edmund and his unusual bio-ship - The Monte Cristo - are out for revenge. Will Edmund be able to go through with it when he realizes what it will cost?

Lovers of space opera, classics, adventure, and LitRPG will love this action-packed short novel. Follow Edmund Dante and his sidekick Jack through the futuristic society in the Company and watch them accomplish his ultimate revenge.

SEPARATOR

I knew going into this that it wasn’t going to be a fantastic read. At about 150 pages, it wouldn’t be feasible to expect a great story from one of the greatest stories ever told (The Count of Monte Cristo) but I did have hopes it would be a good story.

In all fairness, the potential for a good story was there. The idea that everyone dueled in the future via virtual reality game called Baccarre, while not original, was fun to read about. Having the Monte Cristo be a living spaceship was cool.

But.

The author’s idea that portraying Edmund at the beginning as a “good” guy because he won’t kill even pirates who are attacking their ship and putting everyones’ lives in danger? I was in complete agreement with the other characters about him (ie, it was the height of selfishness, self-centeredness and childishness). Baccarre was just another take on Yugioh and “It’s time to da-da-da Duel!” virtual fighting. The Monte Cristo as a super smart living ship came straight from the manga Gankutsuou. Then having Albert be Edmund and Mercede’s son and Mercedes dying, it was just too much of a change for no good reason.

Add in that the writing was simply workmanlike and in no ways brilliant? If you’re going to try to retell a classic story, your writing had better live up to original. Both Wilson and Gunningham, in terms of skill, belong to the group of people who write fan fiction and post it online, hoping some idiot will support them. It wasn’t even badly written, which almost makes it worse. It was just completely pedestrian.

I looked at other reviews online before posting this and people were giving it 5 stars and saying great and wonderful it was. Either they are shills, or they are idiots or they wouldn’t know a good book if I hit them over the head with it. This was NOT a good book. I don’t care if you liked this book, because taste is subjective (sadly), but it is not a good book in any way, shape or form. So don’t say that it is. It is trash and the authors should be ashamed of writing such subpar crap and sullying the good reputation of The Count of Monte Cristo. I’ve seen that they have done the same thing to Moby Dick but that was released in 2017 and there’s nothing else from the duo since them. But Wilson has managed to pump out 120 “books” on Amazon, so that should tell you all you really need to know.

★☆☆☆☆

Sunday, April 02, 2023

The Emperor’s Finest (WH40K: Ciaphas Cain #7) ★★★✬☆

Title: The Emperor’s Finest
Series: WH40K: Ciaphas Cain #7
Authors: Sandy Mitchell
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 288
Words: 102K

From Wh40k.lexicanum.com & Bookstooge.blog

Part One

After his harrowing escape from the Necron Tomb on Inheritus Prime, Ciaphas Cain regains consciousness in the Apothecarion of the Reclaimers' Strike Cruiser Revenant, and makes the acquaintance of the battle force's commander, Captain Gries, and Apothecary Sholer and Techmarine Drumon, who have collaborated on the augmetic fingers grafted onto Cain's hand in place of the two lost to the Necrons. Since Cain was originally assigned as the Commissariat's liaison to the Reclaimers, there is no reason why he shouldn't accompany them on their mission to suppress a rebellion on Viridia.

According to a short excerpt from Jerval Sekara's often-used travelogue, Viridia is a productive Agri World that is the hub of several important mining stations on the surrounding moons and asteroids. The whole system is a vital source of raw materials for the subsector, which explains why a minor civil insurrection on what would otherwise be considered a rustic backwater merited the intervention of the Emperor's own Astartes...

Unfortunately, by the time the Revenant translates into the system, the conflict has escalated into a full-blown civil war. Several elements of the PDF have defected to the rebels, including a small SDF flotilla that attacks the Revenant upon its arrival. These small ships are no match for the Strike Cruiser, and Gries prepares to embark for the surface immediately. Despite the manifest danger, Cain always feels safer on the ground than in the void, and accompanies them in their Thunderhawk.

The rebels are already besieging the capital city when Gries and Cain land inside the Palace and introduce themselves to Governor DuPanya.

The loyalist PDF commander explains that the rebels are divided into several feuding groups, and the Imperials' only advantage is that they are fighting each other as much as the loyalists. But Gries and Cain look closer at the tactical display and notice something wrong: the feuding between the rebel factions is a charade, and they have in fact organized a superbly coordinated cordon around the city - more coordinated, Cain notices, than he would expect from a Guard unit of the same size. Any counter-attack the Imperials launch will have to conceal the fact that they are on to the rebels' trick, or they will close the trap even more quickly.

Gries outlines a three-pronged assault; one detachment of the Reclaimers will secure strategic points inside the city, while another attacks the rebels' armour contingent. A third force is needed to neutralize the rebels' mobile artillery batteries; since the approach will need to be secret, their best option is through the sewer tunnels - a job unsuitable for Space Marines in Power Armour. Cain is unwise enough to point this out, inadvertently making it seem like he's volunteering to lead the mission.

Enter Mira DuPanya, the Governor's daughter and honourary Colonel-in-Chief of the household guard unit of the PDF, who volunteers a squad of her troops, but insists on accompanying them. Cain urges her in the strongest terms to stay behind and let the real soldiers get on with the job, but she refuses to listen. She points out that, as a Commissar, Cain has no direct command authority, and Cain is forced to concede the point (ruefully deciding that shooting her is not an option, if he wants to maintain a good relationship with the Governor).

As they make their way towards the rebels' position, Cain is forced to admit that Mira knows her way around the tunnels, and the anti-intrusion traps. When they are under the rebels' artillery park, Cain reluctantly says he will go up first (not out of bravery, but because he doesn't trust the others' stealth skills).

True to form, Mira insists on following him. Cain manages to mine the rebels' artillery, but another member of their party attracts the attention of an enemy patrol. Cain and Mira are separated from them and forced to flee down a sewer tunnel, alone. There they come across a horde of mutants, led by Cain's worst fear: a Purestrain genestealer. Cain manages to hold off the beast with his chainsword, but the two of them have no where to go as the pack of hybrids closes around them. Just as they are preparing for a semi-heroic last stand, the Purestrain and the rest of the genestealers are scattered by storm bolter fire, as a squad of Terminators from the Reclaimers teleport to their position, guided by Cain's vox set.

With their lives unexpectedly spared, Cain and Mira make a mutual decision to forget their earlier friction and engage in a more "productive" working relationship...

Part Two

As the Reclaimers and the PDF are mopping up the remains of the insurrection and the genestealers, Cain is able to watch the drama from his suite at the Governor's palace, Mira having persuaded her father that his abilities are most needed away from the front lines. Cain is cheered when Guard reinforcements arrive, accompanied by Jurgen, who is still piqued that Cain decided to go off to Inheritus Prime without him.

Captain Gries announces that the genestealers likely came to the planet on a Space Hulk, and their next mission is to track it down. At first, Cain wants no part of the job, but changes his mind quickly when Mira, fearing that he is about to leave the planet, insists that they need to have a serious talk about "us."

After tracking down the space hulk, it is revealed that all the flipping nutjob Emperor people want to invade it to find old tech. So they do. And it is swarming with gene stealers and orks. A massive battle ensues, Astartes die left and right, Cain and Jurgen survive and Mira ends up marrying the planetary governor. The End.

First off, this book typifies why I don’t like the Astartes or to read about them. Arrogant, powerful but then completely overwhelmed and destroyed by creatures that regular humans take care of on a regular basis. I guess I expect a lot more from my “super soldiers” than the WH40K universe does. Plus, with them getting wiped out all the time, how are there any left to actually fight the forces of chaos and stuff? I’ve known this ever since I tried to read the first book or two of the Horus Heresy and is why I almost gave up on the whole Warhammer 40,000 universe altogether.

Thankfully, the Astartes and the Cog Boyz are simply side players and Cain and Jurgen take front and center and dazzle us, well ok, dazzle me anyway. But since I’m the most important here, that’s a Royal Us. Get used to it peasants. Cain gets to fight both orks and gene stealers all at the same time and it’s great. I kept waiting for a Tau contingent to pop in as well, but I was able to overcome my disappointment at that particular lack.

This also goes to show just how inhumane the Imperium of Man actually is. Humanity is a resource that the Emperor uses like straw. For that matter, who is running things anyway? The Emperor is a rotting corpse at the moment, so who runs things, a committee? I never really thought about that until this book, but who makes the Astartes do things? And why haven’t they completely fallen apart trying to take the Emperor’s place? And even if they don’t want to take over, who is running things? People, whether regular or genetically modified supermen, do not do well taking care of their own lives. They need someone to tell them what to do. And a whole space empire would fracture under it’s own weight if there wasn’t a hand on the helm.

I am sure all of those questions have been answered in the other 1000’s of WH40K books, because if I can think of those questions after reading under 50 of them, somebody else must have thought those same questions years and years ago. But I’m not going to go wading through the drek of the Astartes to find the answers. Call me Muhammad. And snap to it bringing that mountain to me, I haven’t got all day you know.

I like books that make me think weird little things like this. It’s fun and easy and if I don’t get my answers, my peace of mind isn’t disturbed.

★★★✬☆

All My “Ciaphas Cain” Reviews