Imperatoris Chronicorum VII

 

This was a peculiar week. But not even regularly peculiar, but in fits and jerks.

Sunday was pretty typical. Church, chores and blogging. I drank a couple of Starbucks Mocha Frappucinos and all that sugar allowed me to stay awake all the way until 10:30pm.

Monday was Labor Day, so I had the day off. Mrs B works retail so she didn't have the day off. It was bright and sunny and I spent the entire day inside, on the couch, watching Gilmore Girls and blogging massive amounts (10+ posts). I'd say it was good relaxation for my body, but with another two bottles of Mocha Frappucinos, well, that's a lot of "healthy" sugar and caffeine.

Work. Well, work. My co-worker's wife is expecting their first kid and he's thinking about nothing but that. He's taking his car to job sites, which means I have to drive the work van. Oh, I hate that pig of a van. And when I wasn't working with my usual co-worker, I was working with Slow Boy 2.0. He drives the van, but my goodness, jobs take twice as long when he's involved. Scuttlebutt is that he's not long with the company. Given his slow track record, I'm not surprised. It just made the week a bit miserable, having to work with him :-/

And then today. It is the 25th Anniversary of 9/11. My co-worker was 4 years old when it happened and now he and his wife are having a kid. I think this might be the last year I do a remembrance post. I remember as a kid seeing "Pearl Harbor Day" on the calendar and wondering why that was on the calendar. What did Pearl Harbor have to do with the world I was living in then? And while I hate to say it, that unborn kid is going to grow up and 9/11 is going to be as historical to him as Pearl Harbor was to me. While I will continue to remember 9/11, I'm choosing to let it fully slide into history. I've arrived at this point over the years and that is reflected in the various remembrance posts where I've thought and remembered and pondered. It doesn't hurt anymore to remember that day. It is time to let the past be the past. I'm ready to accept that now.

On a much more positive note, this month Mrs B and I celebrate 18 years of marriage. We're celebrating tonight so I won't be home when this goes live. I'll be responding to comments tomorrow. We're doing our usual Cheesecake Factory run and there is a very good chance that when this post goes live that I'll be in the middle of eating some cheeseburger spring rolls while I wait for my shepherds pie with extra mashed potatoes to be cooked.

I shower you all with blessings of beneficence and cheer. See you tomorrow!

9/11 - I Still Remember

 

Today was a normal day except inside my head and heart. I worked, just like I did 24 years ago. I ate breakfast, lunch and now dinner. Life, normal ordinary Life, continues on. But I will remember and I will for the rest of my life. A shared private grief that like a badly set broken bone, has healed but will always twinge on the date of its occurrence. I bow my head in silence.

9/11 - Remembering the Heroes

My memories of 9/11 are specifically tied to the Twin Towers, as I saw them fall on tv. But that was not all that happened that day and I think it is time for me to start remembering that.

Three planes were hijacked that day. In one of them, the brave men and women who were the passengers fought back against the hijackers, causing the plane to crash into the ground, causing no additional harm, unlike what happened to the Twin Towers. They sacrificed themselves so that no others would come to harm. That is the true definition of a Hero. Heroes don’t always get happy endings in real life. Those men and women all died, just like the people in the other two planes. Don’t get me wrong, I am not denigrating the passengers in the other planes. While I would like to think I would have stood up and fought back, I know myself well enough that I am sure I would have frozen up. And things happened FAST.

Today I choose to remember the brave men and women who sacrificed themselves so that no one else had to die. I Will Never Forget!

9/11 - The Slide into History

Last year, the weight of 9/11 felt like it was going to break me. I thought this year was going to be worse. But thankfully, writing about 9/11 each year for the past several years has given me an outlet for the grief and pain. It has been cathartic for an event that, from a national viewpoint, has shaped my life more than anything else to date.

It is time to let the pain go and let this event slide into history.

I will still remember. But I will remember with the tint of time covering the glare of pain and horror and I will CHOOSE to do so.

9/11 - An Unbearable Weight of Remembrance

Another year, another day, another time to remember what happened. Last year I mentioned how hard it was getting to remember this. Not in terms of forgetting, but in terms of remembering in the face of a whole generation who it means literally nothing to.

I can remember growing up and wondering why Pearl Harbor Day was on the calendar. Sure, I knew that PHD had happened and it was a bad time but that was way back in my grandfather’s day. I was watching anime from japan and I had a sony dvd player for goodness sake. I could say “ohayo” with the best of them (that’s “good morning”). I couldn’t understand why People were still trying to remember something from so long ago.

Now I understand. And it is a weight upon my shoulders. Every year it gets heavier and becomes harder to even think about it, much less publicly remember it. And I will cry each year in private and wonder if I’m the only one left who is remembering and then the next day I will be fine and know that others were grieving as well. I am not alone in my pain and tears. So each year I post about it and then wonder if I’m being a middle aged fool. Until the next year rolls around and I repeat it all over again. I will drag these chains another year so that the kids don’t have to. They will get their own chains soon enough, no need to burden them with this. This is MY pain to deal with.

I will remember 9/11.