Conan and the Mists of Doom (Conan the Barbarian #34) 1.5Stars

 

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Title: Conan and the Mists of Doom
Series: Conan the Barbarian #34
Author: Roland Green
Rating: 1.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 184
Words: 71K
Publish: 1995

This was one of the worst Conan stories I’ve read so far, and I’ve read some real stinkers. It was an accumulated weight of misery that built up over time and I just couldn’t take it any more. When I finished this book, I swore off of these pastiches. Not necessarily for good, but at least until I go and read ALL the original Conan stuff by Howard.

This was a garbage story and the writing was that of a hack. It felt very much like Green had written his own “adventure” story and when it wouldn’t sell (because it was so boring and dumb and stupid), repurposed it into a Conan story. This wasn’t just “not good”, but it was “bad”. I shouldn’t feel like I’m reading some highschooler’s “story” when I’m reading a Conan novel. I need the skill and talent in the writing that makes me feel that sizzle, that zing as the sword chops through the monster. Just describing the action isn’t writing the action and I’m afraid this writer doesn’t have the skill to do that.

Blehhhhhh...

★✬☆☆☆

From Wikipedia

The story is set in the Kezankian Mountains and the borderlands of Turan. After Conan's time spent with the Afghulis begins to sour, he leads a band of tribesmen away from the Afghuli mountains and towards Koth. During their journey, the tribesmen are intercepted by a force of Turanian cavalry, led by Khezal, an old acquaintance of Conan's.[2] Khezal offers Conan and his warriors freedom if they help combat the Mist of Doom, a life-draining force that is attacking Khezal's territory near the mountains. Unbeknownst to ether Conan or Khezal, the Mist is controlled by the Lady of the Mists, who is gathering captives to feed to the Mist, in hopes of controlling it.

The Afghulis and Turanians meet up with a third group of desert nomads, the Ekinari, led by Bethina, an attractive young warrior woman. The three groups combine forces in an effort to defeat the Mist before it grows out of control. In the climactic battle, the Lady of the Mist is killed, but not before she can summon an elemental. The two magical forces collide, destroying the valley and each other. Conan's chief advisor, Farad, and Bethina stay in the valley to repopulate it while Conan rides on into Koth.

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Conan at the Demon’s Gate (Conan the Barbarian #33) 3Stars

 

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Title: Conan at the Demon’s Gate
Series: Conan the Barbarian #33
Author: Roland Green
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 198
Words: 78K
Publish: 1994

This was much more enjoyable than the previous Conan adventure by Green, Conan the Relentless. I compared that to store brand rice crispies. This adventure felt more like the Real Thing and I enjoyed all the magic and fighting.

★★★☆☆

From Wikipedia

In a first-person prologue set during the sixth year of Conan the Second's (formerly Prince Conn) reign over Aquilonia, a soldier, Nidaros, tells of his company's harrowing experiences during a frontier war with the Picts. The prologue culminates when Nidaros, his companion, Sarabos, and their followers are trapped by the enemy inside a cave. The Picts seem to fear the place, understandably, since it shows signs of having once been a site sacred to Set, the serpent god of Stygia. Oddly, the Aquilonians also discover a great stone statue in the image of the former king Conan the First (or Conan the Great, as he is also remembered). Should they doubt it, they need only look at Sarabos; it's an open secret that he is a bastard son of the first Conan, and hence a half-brother of Conn.

The tale then shifts to events many years earlier in the life of Conan the First, well before he became ruler of Aquilonia, in the wake of "Queen of the Black Coast". Following the death of his lover, the pirate queen Belit, Conan ventures inland into the jungles of Kush. He encounters and joins forces with a band of Bamula tribesmen. Aiding the Bamulas in their conflict with an enemy tribe, he rises to a position of precarious authority among them.

Suddenly, creatures alien to the Bamulas begin invading their territory, including a dragon and a polar bear. They turn out to have been transported through a magical portal. Entering the portal with his warriors in an attempt to end the threat, Conan finds himself teleported to the far-distant Pictish Wilderness. The portal, known as the Demon's Gate, turns out to be the creation of an exiled wizard. He intends on sacrificing both Conan and the Bamulas, so he can animate the statue of an ancient warrior for his own evil purposes.

Plot complications present themselves in the form of the wizard's beautiful daughter and the native Picts, who are violently hostile towards all strangers. All of Conan's prowess and craft are needed to deal with the impossible situation as one threat follows another in rapid succession.

Much of the concluding portion of this story is narrated to Nidaros and Sarabos by their comrade in arms, Vasilios, a half-Pictish Aquilonian warrior who had heard it in turn from his Pictish mother. The tale gradually unfolds of how Conan eventually defeated his enemies, before transporting himself and the Bamulas safely back to their country—and how the statue took on his aspect.

An epilogue returns the scene to Nidaros, Sarabos, and their companions listening to the end of Vasilios's tale. The company is rescued from the besieging Picts by a relief force who had been informed of their plight by a mysterious messenger the very evening they were trapped in the cave. According to Vasilios, it's said that the statue will aid the blood-kin of the warrior it is fashioned after at need, and the three speculate that the messenger was a magical sending from the statue, prompted by Sarabos's presence. They decide to keep silent about it.

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Conan the Relentless (Conan the Barbarian #31) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Conan the Relentless
Series: Conan the Barbarian #31
Author: Roland Green
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 194
Words: 76K
Publish: 1992

Roland Green is the next author I am trying out who wrote Conan pastiches. I believe he wrote seven books and I was able to get a hold of five of them. I wasn’t paying attention and just added them willy-nilly to my calibre library and thus when I began this book, by the references Green makes, it was obvious this came after at least one other book of his. It didn’t really matter though, so I just rolled with it. I did end up re-ordering these Conan books by Green after reading this one, so hopefully the future books won’t have any more of that “huh, I’ve missed a story” feeling.

Overall, these was a slightly less than average Conan story. Green knows how to include all the elements of a good Conan story but like many of the writers of these pastiches, just doesn’t have the same fire that Howard had with his words. If I were to compare this to a food item, I’d say it’s kind of like store brand rice krispies.

★★★☆☆

From Wikipedia

After the events of "The Lair of the Ice Worm", Conan enters the Border Kingdom. Encountering a group of bandits, he learns that the guards of a caravan they plan to raid are led by Raihna, a female adventurer he had previously encountered in Conan the Valiant. This news leads him to abandon his inclination in joining the bandits and come to the aid of Raihna, instead. Afterwards, the duo enter the service of Eloikis, theoretical king over the restive and semi-independent lords of the country, who needs their aid against a powerful count and two demon-controlling wizards. The story follows their adventures as Eloikis' troubleshooters, which ultimately concludes with their rescue of both his daughter and grandson. But their partnership dissolves when Rhiana decides to marry one of the king's guards, and Conan resumes his wanderings, heading south.

• The “Essential Conan” Trilogy

• All of My “Conan” Reviews