Wednesday, December 24, 2025

Zenya (Dumarest #11) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Zenya
Series: Dumarest #11
Author: EC Tubb
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 182
Words: 53K
Publish: 1974


The adventures are wearing thin because Tubb can only come up with so many plausible ways for Earl to get screwed over time after time. Does Earl find a planet with a princess who loves him? Too bad. Does Earl make a killing in the market and become a space kajillionaire? Too bad!

It doesn’t matter. Tubb screws Earl Dumarest every chance he gets and I for one am getting bored. Plus, Earl can just have his memory looked at and get the coordinates of Earth, but he won’t because of the magic boojum scienze thingy “that is too dangerous for anyone to have”, except Earl of course.

I think this will be the last 3 star read and I strongly think my next Dumarest will be my last. The artificial way that the author keeps Earl from achieving his goal is becoming too great for me to overlook any more.

Also, I am getting SUPER sick and tired of the women in these stories either going insane, being insane or getting killed, to prevent them from staying with Earl. Once again, it is glaringly artificial and it really grates, like sandpaper on your forearm.

★★★☆☆


From Devilreads

Earl Dumarest is a man lost in space. Sort of. He stowed away on a ship leaving Earth when he was only ten. The old Captain, childless, had taken pity on him and let him work off his passage. Ever since he'd been moving outward into the galaxy, Though biologically only early middle age, owing to the vagaries of space ship travel, he's much older. Low passage is basically for animals, a suspended animation. People use it though because it's cheap and most use it even though dangerous: there's a fifteen percent death rate of users. Earl had used it often. High passage is for the rich, and Earl used it whenever he was flush, where metabolism is sped up and time passes much more slowly for the user.
Now he wants to go home.
Here's the problem: in this far flung future, humanity has spread throughout the Milky Way, literally millions of inhabited planets, and most have never heard of Earth. "A planet named Dirt! Ridiculous!" Those who have heard it believe it's a myth. "The idea that Humans came from one planet! Ridiculous!"
Earl knows Earth, Terra, is real. Old and war torn even when he was a child, Lord knows what it's like now. But it's home. He searches for clues in libraries on the various planets he visits, picking them up now and again, building an area of the Milky Way where it has to lie.
He's pursued every step of the way by the Cyclans, those cyborg/computer beings of Cylcon, who want the secret he didn't even know he possessed, a gift from a woman, for a long time. It was stolen from the Cyclans before they could use it, a method to control humanity, and they want it back.
Earl is just as determined that they won't get it.
Earl is on Paiyar visiting an old library when he's picked up by the beautiful Zenya who says her grandfather wants to see him. And when old Chan Parect, Aihult of the Serpent Clan, speaks, everyone jumps.
It doesn't take Earl long to get the measure of the old man. crazy as a loon, the clan is inbred and all of them are privileged and not used to the realities of life. He wants his son found, he's been off-planet since before Zenya was born. He's blackmailed into the hunt, pushed by grandson of the Aihult into a fight. As with the spoiled rich, the boy thinks he's better than Earl. But earl has fought to many battles in the arena and easily wins, sparing the boy's life. Not satisfied, the boy tries to murder him late that night, Earl supposedly drugged, and this time doesn't survive.
Earl, though, is knocked unconscious and when he comes around is given the news, Find the old man's son or a device implanted in his body will be turned on and the Cyclans given the frequency, making him a beacon easy to find anywhere in the galaxy.
Chard is the planet where the son was last seen. it's a woar-torn planet, a new war, and it's full of brightly uniformed rich boys playing at war more than anything. Earl poses as a war chieftain from a mercenary planet in order to get on planet and is soon embroiled in the battle, training the posers and trying to find out who the enemy really is. The primitives they are supposedly fighting can't really be the enemy. Earl can see that. No evidence of them is ever found in the destroyed villages. But they are blinded in their hate.
Earl must first solve that problem before he can get to his. Which he does and then the heir is murdered by his insane aunt. So much for Dumarest and Earth.



Tuesday, December 23, 2025

Ethan of Athos (Vorkosigan Saga #3) 1Star DNF@14%

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Ethan of Athos
Series: Vorkosigan Saga #3
Author: Lois Bujold
Rating: 1 of 5 Stars DNF@14%
Genre: SF
Pages: 183 / 25
Words: 63K / 9K
Publish: 1986



Due to the main character having a sexual relationship with his foster brother, I will not be reading any more by Bujold.

★☆☆☆☆


From Wikipedia

Dr. Ethan Urquhart, Chief of Biology at the Sevarin District Reproduction Centre on Athos, is upset to find that his long-awaited shipment of ovarian tissue cultures from off-planet consists of an unusable mixture of dead and animal tissues. An all-male planetary colony, Athos relies on uterine replicator technology for reproduction, but the centuries-old cultures introduced by the original colonists have recently begun deteriorating into senescence. The Population Council of Athos sends a reluctant Ethan to the planet Jackson's Whole, where the shipment originated, in search of a fresh batch of tissue cultures and (if possible) a refund from the supplier, House Bharaputra, one of the crime syndicates which rule Jackson's Whole. This already difficult assignment is made more so because it means dealing with women, whom Athosians are taught to view as demonic and terrifying.

Ethan arrives at the interstellar hub of Kline Station and immediately encounters his first woman, Commander Elli Quinn, a rather unorthodox intelligence officer with the Dendarii Free Mercenary Fleet (and a subordinate of Admiral Naismith's). Though she is pleasant and even helpful, Ethan is wary of her. He is soon abducted and interrogated by military agents from Cetaganda who are seeking a fugitive named Terrence Cee, as well as their own lost tissue cultures. They refuse to believe that Ethan is not an opposing intelligence operative. Elli rescues Ethan from certain execution. They become reluctant allies; Elli explains that she has actually been hired by House Bharaputra to track the Cetagandans, and for her own reasons determine what their interest is in the tissue cultures and how it relates to a secret Cetagandan research project.

Terrence approaches Ethan with a request for asylum, revealing himself to be the last survivor of a Cetagandan genetic project to create telepaths. Although his telepathy is reliable, it has a small range and can only be triggered for a short amount of time by ingesting large doses of the amino acid tyramine. Terrance's female counterpart, Janine, had been killed in their escape, but he managed to preserve her body and transport it to Jackson's Whole, where he paid House Bharaputra to splice her genes into the ovarian cultures that were intended for Athos. Terrence had planned to also emigrate to Athos with the cultures, but had been delayed on his way to Kline Station, and is now horrified to learn that the cultures were stolen.

The Cetagandans had tracked Terrence to Jackson's Whole; arriving after his departure, they killed the Bharaputra researchers who had worked with him and destroyed their records. They then traced the tissue shipment to Kline Station, knowing Terrence would eventually come for it, though they have no knowledge of what happened to the original cultures and are desperate to reclaim them. Elli and Ethan manage to have the Cetagandans seized by Kline Station security, just as they discover that a minor official at the station had, for petty personal reasons, "thrown out" the Bharaputran tissue cultures that contained Janine's genes and replaced them with the useless biological material. Elli attempts to recruit Terrence for the Dendarii; he refuses, but gives Elli a small genetic sample. Meanwhile, Ethan asks Elli for (and receives) one of her ovaries to create a new tissue culture. After her departure, the original Bharaputran shipment unexpectedly turns up intact and usable, not destroyed. Ethan buys a new set of ovarian cultures from Beta Colony anyway as a cover, uses their packaging to relabel the cultures with Janine's genes, and returns with them and Terrence to Athos.



Monday, December 22, 2025

JunĂșn Efreet - MTG 4E

 

Now here's a guy who you can tell from the get-go that he wants to rip your heart out and eat it in front of you. And with that glowing cook arm, it'll be nice and tender, like a steak!


Friday, December 19, 2025

Servant of the Dragon (Lord of the Isles #3) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: Servant of the Dragon
Series: Lord of the Isles #3
Author: David Drake
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Epic Fantasy
Pages: 573
Words: 206K
Publish: 1999



A magical tour-de-force where the adventures never stop. Thankfully, the group isn’t quite as broken up as in Queen of Demons, but man, they do stay apart right up until the very end.

This time it’s a cabal of old time’y wizards who have imprisoned their master and are using the mummified remains of a non-human wizard to power everything. For guys who are powerful enough to raise islands, animate the dead and bridge the multiverse, they are dumb as bricks. Several of them pretty much die from just standing there and looking dumb while guys with swords are running at them, with the obvious intent to kill them. They really weren’t characters in the story, just levers to make the plot clunk along :-D

I think these would have been better novels if Drake had cut them down to about 300+ pages. Get rid of one or two adventures and cut out the “Back in Barka’s Hamlet we….” schtick that every character goes through in every single chapter and easy peasy. It would also help hide the fact that Drake has deliberately made each character a non-character. I’m sure it makes them easier to write, but my goodness, it gets wearing.

I did enjoy this, because like I said, the adventures are non-stop and I was never bored. However, I am glad to stop this for a bit and start reading the Dracula Files again. Aye yi yi, the words that come out of my mouth sometimes….

★★★☆☆


From Wikipedia

In the introduction, seven wizards use a mummified reptilian creature to cast a spell to raise Yole from the depths. Meanwhile, the main characters are in Valles, where a magical blue bridge has appeared where there hasn't been a bridge for hundreds of years. Upon seeing it Tenoctris ascertains that while it is dangerous, it is not associated with the evil Throne of Malkar. While investigating the bridge and the mysterious happenings associated with it, a massive bird appears, snatches up Sharina, and disappears with her.

Cashel immediately determines to find Sharina and rescue her. Tenoctris uses her art and determines that whoever sent the bird to kidnap Sharina means her no harm. She sends Cashel to Landure, a wizard on another plane who can help him. Cashel arrives next to an ajar door; a beautiful woman rushes out, pursued by an angry wizard. Cashel fights the wizard, using his quarterstaff, and kills him. The woman, Colva, takes Cashel to Landure's castle where she puts him into a drug-induced stupor through which he discovers that she is actually a demoness. When Cashel recovers, he returns to the body of the wizard, who was in actuality Landure. Cashel discovers that Landure's sapphire ring contains a powerful demon, named Krias. Krias informs Cashel that he must take a small wafer from Landure's body which can be used to animate a new body and bring Landure back—but he must travel through the Underworld to reach Landure's extra bodies. Cashel takes Krias with him. Eventually Cashel reaches the entrance to the third level of the underworld where Colva originally stayed. While there, Cashel eats some of the fruit of the Tree of Life. At Krias' suggestion, Chashel puts one of the fruit in his satchel. Cashel comes to Landure's castle where he puts the wafer under the tongue of one of the paintings of Landure. Cashel gives Krias back to Landure. When Landure begins insulting Cashel, Krias refuses to serve him anymore, prompting Landure to give Krias back to Cashel. In exchange for his freedom from the sapphire, Krias helps Cashel to cross the Chasm and reach Sharina.

Garric, Liane, and Tenoctris stay in Valles to deal with the problem of the bridge. Garric also faces possible rebellion from several lords and bickering among others. Hoping to kill two birds with one stone, Garric assigns Lord Tadai to be ambassador to Sandrakkan. Garric has several dreams about Klestis, a city destroyed at the same time Yole was, and the wizard, Ansalem. Ansalem possessed many objects of power, including a mummy of a reptilian creature, a foot-wide fossilized ammonite, and a powerful amphisbaena. King Carus reveals that he once sought Ansalem's help in unifying the isles, but Ansalem refused. Ansalem had seven acolytes (the most dangerous of which was Purlio) who used the ammonite to imprison him while he was weak after rescuing Klestis from the destruction of Yole. Anselm reveals that he has nothing to do with the bridge, but if he can get his amphisbaena back, he can repair it. Tenoctris determines that she needs to visit a wizard named Alman and borrow his viewing crystal. Katchin the Miller, who raised Cashel, appears begging Garric for a job, but Garric turns him away (and he is later captured by Colva). Tenoctris takes them to the end of time. They find Alman in a ruined city and he discovers that his viewing crystal has been stolen from him. The group returns to their own time, leaving Alman in his solitude. After spending a few days tending to matters of state in Valles, Garric receives news that his uncle has helped someone to kidnap Tenoctris. Garric and some of the Blood Eagles cross through a portal to ancient Klestris, to retrieve her but are thwarted. Before returning to Valles, they rescue a woman who claims that she is Colva, wife of Landure, the Guardian, and warns them that seven necromancers intend to do battle with them. She opines that they have kidnapped Tenoctris in order to sacrifice her and increase their own magical powers. At midnight they cross the bridge which showed up at the beginning of the story, to attack the seven necromancers on Klestis. They are confronted with an army of undead under the control of three necromancers, whom they slay. They find Tenoctris unconscious in Ansalem's chambers. Purlio and another of the acolytes are casting spells on her. Purlio takes the fossil ammonite and merges it with himself, replacing his head with it. Armies of undead begin entering Klestis, coming across bridges similar to the one that first set these events in motion.

Ilna determines that she can be of no further help in Valles, so she negotiates passage to Sandrakkan with Lord Tadai. Ilna reluctantly makes friends with Lord Tadai's niece, Merota. The first night on the ship, Ilna and a tough-looking sailor named Chalcus, witness the beginnings of a mutiny. Ilna tries to warn the captain and Lord Tadai of the imminent mutiny, but they ignore her. The mutiny takes place, as Ilna had warned, and the sailors put everyone except Merota and Ilna ashore on an island. Eventually they arrive at Yole and put ashore. That night they are attacked by a monster. Frightened, the sailors put Ilna, Merota, and Chalcus ashore to reconnaissance. In the interior of the island they discover a harbor bordered by a polis full of reanimated dead people. As they watch, a swarm of Great Ones tow their now-empty ships into the harbor. As they make their way around the island, a creature called the Tall Thing (which was once Ansalemn's child) kidnaps Merota. While pursuing it, Ilna is captured by a wizard named Ewis (one of Ansalem's apprentices) who has the Lens of Rushila. In trying to escape, Ilna releases the Tall Thing which kills and eats Ewis. They meet back up with Chalcus and make their way to the harbor. There they discover that the crews of their ships have been murdered and then reanimated. They flee and spend the night in a cavern. They come to a chasm with a bridge which takes them to a frozen Klestis. There they find Purlio (with his ammonite head) performing incantations using the Dragon. A second necromancer attacks them with three ice beetles. Chalcus defeats the ice beetles while Ilna subdues the necromancer long enough for Merota to bash in his head with a rock. Then they attack Purlio.

Sharina is carried by the bird through several planes of existence, including some which are disturbing and grotesque. Finally it deposits her on a beach next to a forest and promptly disappears. Inside a broken-down temple covered with images of serpents she meets a reptilian creature, the Dragon. He reveals that he has brought her back to the past to send her on a mission to recover his mummy which is being used to raise Yole and reanimate the dead. He gives her a snakeskin which she is to take with her back to her own time. Then she goes through a portal and finds herself centuries into the future. She hires a graceful, large bird-like being, named Dalar, as her bodyguard. The pass through several more portals. The last takes them to Klestis at the time when Ansalem was rescuing it during the destruction of Yole. They climb to Ansalem's chambers where they find his seven acolytes and the Dragon. Ansalem is bound and his son has been vivisected and is being transformed into the Tall Thing.

Sharina and Dalar are locked out, but at that moment Cashel appears and uses his quarterstaff to punch open the door. When they come through, though, instead of the seven necromancers, they find Garric and Tenoctris. Purlio has escaped. Tenoctris casts a spell which takes them to the frozen time where they encounter Purlio as well as Ilna and her companions. Together they defeat Purlio, but he flees and takes refuge in the land of the dead. The companions are whisked back to Ansalem's chambers. There Sharina burns the mummy and gives the snakeskin to Tenoctris—it is from an amphisbaena. While everyone is distracted, Colva attacks and kills Garric. Liane then kills Colva. In the land of the dead, Garric encounters Purlio and severs his connection to the living world, thus killing him completely. Cashel revives Garric using the fruit from the Tree of Life in his satchel. Using the amphisbaena snakeskin, Tenoctris frees Ansalem from the cyst he was trapped in. Ansalem returns everyone to their homes—including Dalar—and then destroys the bridges that connect the different planes of existence.

Major characters

Garric—the Prince of Haft and future Lord of the Isles. His ancestor, King Carus, has taken up residence in his head and aids him in matters of sword and state.
Sharina—Garric's half-sister. The Dragon seeks her help in escaping bondage to seven necromancers.
Cashel—a large, simple shepherd who would be content to be just a sheepherder. He is half human, half sprite. His power is manifest through his use of an iron-ferruled quarterstaff.
Liane—a noblewoman who has some magical abilities and is romantically involved with Garric.
Ilna—Cashel's sister who doesn't feel she fits in with the others due to her past and her unrequited love for Garric. She is half human, half sprite. Her power is manifest through her use of thread and fabric.
Tenoctris—a wizardess from King Carus’ day who accidentally sent herself forward in time when Yole was being sunk into the ocean. Her power comes not from strength in magic, but from careful study and exact execution of spells. She is an atheist.

Minor characters

Alman—a wizard who prefers to live a life of solitude at the end of time
Ansalem the Wise—a powerful wizard from the time of King Carus
Lord Attaper—commander of the Blood Eagles
Celondre—a historical poet, philosopher, and aristocrat (modeled after Horace)
Chalcus—a chanteyman and former pirate who allies himself with Ilna
Colva—a demoness who escapes the Underworld with Cashel's unwitting help
Dalar—a member of the Rokonar and Sharina's bodyguard
Elfin—a human boy kidnapped by the People and taken to the Underworld
Ewis—one of Ansalem's apprentices
Harn—a spider-like creature which guards a bridge on Yole
Katchin—Cashel's sycophantic, self-serving uncle
Krias—a powerful demon imprisoned inside Landure's sapphire ring
Landure—a wizard on another plane, guardian of the Underworld
Count Lerdoc—ruler of Blaise
Merota—Lord Tadai's niece
Mykon—a prince who lived on Cordin before the sinking of Yole
Purlio of Mnar—principle acolyte of Ansalem the Wise and a powerful wizard in his own right who surrenders himself to one of the Great Ones
Reise—Garric's adoptive father
Lord Royhas—Garric's royal chancellor
Lord Tadai—Garric's Royal Treasurer and later Ambassador of the Prince to Sandrakkan
Tiglath—the captain of a brothel-barge
King Valence—current Lord of the Isles
Vonculo—sailing master of The Terror and a mutineer
Earl Wildulf—ruler of Sandrakkan



Thursday, December 18, 2025

The 300% Solution (Groo the Wanderer #47) 3.5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot, by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: The 300% Solution
Series: Groo the Wanderer #47
Author: Sergio Aragones
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 25
Words: 2K
Publish: 1989



Everybody Groo has met over the years come together to overcome all obstacles and steal the fabled Starburst Sapphire, in a mythical tower guarded by monsters, traps, eternal soldiers and plain old magic. Everything is spearheaded by Arcadio, the blond charismatic barbarian. He lets Groo be his lackey and Groo, all by himself, ends up hiring the Sage, Arba and Darkarba (the witches) and his old enemy Taranto the mercenary. Arba and Darkarba end up hiring Grativo the sorcerer, while Arcadio has hired Grooella. Everybody has been promised 50% of the Starburst Sapphire. Groo kills everything and everybody starts arguing about how THEY get 50%. So Groo throws down the jewel and breaks it into pieces so everybody can divvy it up. The comic ends with everybody chasing Groo, trying to kill him.

Ahhh, classic Groo!

From the title and as soon as Groo promises the Sage 50%, you know what is going to happen. There is never any doubt that Groo WILL get the Sapphire because when it comes to a quest, Groo just can’t fail. He just never succeeds like a normal person and thus it is here, hahahaha.

I’ve included the opening double page spread because once again Aragones sets the entire mood for the comic here. And my goodness, the artwork is just gawgeous, gawgeous I say!



★★★✬☆




Wednesday, December 17, 2025

Witches Abroad (Discworld #12) 4Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Witches Abroad
Series: Discworld #12
Author: Terry Pratchett
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 202
Words: 81K



I enjoyed this, had almost no problems with the philosophy presented by Pratchett and just watched as the story unfolded before me. This is how ALL of Pratchett’s stories should be. So I will appreciate it when it happens.

★★★★☆


From Wikipedia.org

Following the death of the witch Desiderata Hollow, Magrat Garlick receives Desiderata's magic wand, for Desiderata was not only a witch but also a fairy godmother. By giving the wand to Magrat, she effectively makes Magrat the new fairy godmother to a young woman called Emberella, who lives across the Disc in Genua. Unfortunately, Desiderata does not give Magrat any instruction on how to use the wand, so almost everything that Magrat points it at simply becomes a pumpkin.

Desiderata had promised a servant girl (providing a twist on Cinderella) named Emberella that she would not be forced to marry the Duc, the figurehead leader of Genua, who is in actuality really a frog, transformed by the magic of Emberella's other fairy godmother, Lady Lilith de Tempscire. Now it is up to Magrat and her companions, Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg, to ensure Emberella does not marry the Duc, despite the desires of Lilith, who wishes to ensure a 'happy ending' by utilizing the Discworld's narrative-based nature - because the servant girl marrying the Prince makes for a happy fairy tale, Lilith reasons that on the Disc, this must hold true as well, whether the marriage is consensual or not.

The trio of witches journey to Genua, which takes some time and involves numerous mis-adventures, such as an encounter with a village terrorised by a Vampire (where Nanny Ogg's cat Greebo catches it in bat form and eats it), an incident where they encounter a Running of the Bulls-like event, and a house falling on Nanny's head which she survives thanks to her hat with the willow reinforcement. Upon arrival in Genua, Magrat goes to meet Emberella, while the two older witches meet Erzulie Gogol, a voodoo witch and her zombie servant, Baron Saturday (who was also her late lover).

It is at this time that Magrat finds out that Emberella has two fairy godmothers, Magrat and Lilith. It was Lilith who had manipulated many of the various stories that the Witches had traveled through and who was now manipulating Genua itself, wrapping the city around her version of the Cinderella story. Lilith has had people arrested for crimes against stories, including the arrest of a toymaker for not being jolly, not whistling and not telling the children stories. At this point it is revealed that Lilith is actually Lily, Granny Weatherwax's older sister. The trio learn that she is planning a masked ball where-in Emberella is supposed to meet the Duc.

Using hypnosis, Granny convinces Magrat to attend the masked ball in place of Emberella. Greebo is transformed into human form to aid the witches. Emberella's dress fits, but the glass slippers do not. After enjoying themselves for a while at the ball, the witches are discovered and are cast into a dungeon.

At that point, Emberella, Mrs. Gogol and Baron Saturday arrive at the ball, having broken the witches out of their prison with the aid of Cassanunda (a dwarf and the Disc's second greatest lover). A high concentration of magic causes the Duc to revert to his frog form, and he is trampled by Baron Saturday, causing Lily to flee. Granny starts to follow, but Mrs. Gogol, wanting to kill Lily, tries to stop Granny by using a voodoo doll. Granny thrusts her arm into a flaming torch and preys upon Mrs. Gogol's own belief in the power of the doll to make it burst into flames. Granny Weatherwax then pursues Lily.

Emberella is informed that, as the daughter of the late Baron Saturday, the previous ruler of Genua, she is now Duchess of Genua. Her first command is to end the ball (she dislikes them) and attend the Mardi Gras parade, a form of binge-drinking carnival.

Granny manages to defeat Lily by trapping her in a mirror, unable to 'find herself', and the three witches return home. Granny shows Magrat how to use the wand to do magic, and that it takes more than wishing - the secret is that there are adjustable dials on the wand. Magrat throws the wand into a river, to be lost forever. Then the Witches go home, the long way, and see the elephant.



Tuesday, December 16, 2025

The Phoenix on the Sword (Conan Chronicles #1) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: The Phoenix on the Sword
Series: Conan Chronicles #1
Author: Robert Howard
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 27
Words: 9K
Publish: 1932


After my last Conan pastiche (Conan and the Mists of Doom), which was horrible, like several of the previous pastiches, I gave up. When one sours on pastiches, it usually means it is time to return to the original material. I had read The Essential Conan (comprising The Hour of the Dragon, People of the Black Circle and Red Nails) back in ‘18 and thoroughly enjoyed it. But trying to track down the other original Conan stories seemed like a real chore, as it was a mix of short stories, novellas and novels and they were scattered all over the place and in various collections by various companies at various times. It was a gigantic ball of messiness and I wanted nothing to do with it. Reading is meant to be fun, not a flipping second job. Then I discovered that Delphi Classics had released one of those Complete Collections of Robert Howard and suddenly I was on easy street. That collection has all his other stuff too, but the Conan stories are linked in the TOC by publication date, so I just have to click on that and I am set.

Which brings us to now. I am going to read all of the original Conan stuff by Howard, story by story, and take my time enjoying the pulpy goodness of it all. I am dividing these up into three different categories: Short Stories, Novellas and Novels. I am calling any story with 10K or less of words a short story while a Novella will be 10K-40K and a Novel will be anything over 40K. Of course, the lines are all squishy, so I might take page numbers into account too, but that gives you the general idea. There are only two full novels and approximately nineteen short stories and novellas. That means I’ll be reading a lot more short stories about Conan over the next couple of years. And with that long winded introduction out of the way, onto the actual review.

This short story takes place much later in Conan’s career. He is currently king of Aquilonia (the big cheese kingdom) and several nobles are trying to depose him. One of them has a pet wizard who breaks free and summons a demon to kill all the nobles (for how they looked down on him) and Conan so that said wizard can become king. Well, there’s another Good Wizard sleeping away in limbo and he summons Conan in a dream and gives him a magic sword that allows him to slay the demon. Thus Conan stays king of Aquilonia.

It is kind of odd to start off with Conan nearer the end of his life than at the beginning, but Howard never allows us to forget that Conan is still a powerful barbarian. It also sets out the template for Conan stories. Some disgruntled people, some magic, some regular fighting, some magic fighting and then Conan kicking butt. The magic also has hints of the cosmic horror about it, which just fits so much better into this Hyborean age than bleeding Merlin with his disneyfied bippity boppity boo.

Thoth-Amon would have their guts for garters...

We are also introduced to Thoth-Amon, a wizard of dark Stygia who plays a role in more than one pastiche. He is the one that summons the demon and his fate is left unresolved, unlike the plotters who all die at the claws of the demon or Conan’s sword.

While I only gave this 3stars, I was still pretty pleased with it. Howard gives us all of the information we need for “this” story with just hints at the wider world of Conan without over burdening the reader. Reading a short story by itself is whole different beast than reading a novel or a whole series of novels or even a whole book of short stories. As such, you’ll have to give me a few stories to find my review footing, as it were. My standard rating will be 3stars until I have a better grasp of Conan as a whole and can be a bit more nuanced, if I feel like it. Or I might just stick with my more typical “I liked/disliked it, the end” kind of review.

I am also calling these official Howard stories about Conan the “Conan Chronicles” to easily separate them from all the Conan the Barbarian pastiches I’ve been reading. It is messy and the organizational part of my soul winces, but I do not want the official stories mixed in with the pastiches. I am including a link under my avatar at the end to all the pastiches though, so if someone wants to they can see what a minefield they have to navigate.

I was able to find an actual cover for this one. Most of what I found was the Weird Stories magazine cover that it was originally in. I hope to have an actual cover for each story, but am not counting on it. I’m certainly not going to be generating my own, even though that would be really nice.

★★★☆☆


From Wikipedia

A middle-aged Conan of Cimmeria tries to govern the turbulent kingdom of Aquilonia.

Conan has recently seized the crown from King Numedides after strangling the tyrant on his throne, but the Cimmerian is more suited to swinging his broadsword than signing official documents. The Aquilonians who originally welcomed Conan as their liberator have turned against him due to his foreign blood, and construct a statue to Numedides' memory in the temple of Mitra; priests burn incense before their slain king, hailing it as the holy effigy of a saintly monarch who was killed by a red-handed barbarian.

A band known as the Rebel Four forms: Volmana, the dwarfish count of Karaban; Gromel, the giant commander of the Black Legion; Dion, the fat baron of Attalus; and Rinaldo, the hare-brained minstrel. Their goal is to put the crown in the hands of someone with royal blood, and to this end they recruit the services of a southern outlaw named Ascalante. However, Ascalante secretly plans to betray his employers and claim the crown. Ascalante also enslaves Thoth-Amon, a Stygian wizard who has fallen on hard times: A thief had stolen Thoth-Amon's ring and left him defenseless, forcing him to flee from Stygia; while disguised as a camel driver, he was waylaid in Koth by Ascalante's reavers. The rest of his caravan was slaughtered, but Thoth-Amon saved himself by revealing his identity and swearing to serve Ascalante.

The conspirators plan to assassinate King Conan when he is unprepared and defenseless, but Thoth-Amon discovers that his ring of power is in Dion's possession, murders him and summons a fanged ape-like demon to slay Ascalante. Conan in turn is warned of this event in a dream by a long-dead sage named Epemitreus, who marks Conan's sword with a mystical phoenix representing Mitra, a Hyborian god. Conan awakens and, prepared for the attack, slays the three remaining members of the Rebel Four, breaking his sword upon the helm of Gromel and using a battle-axe against the rest of his would-be assassins. Conan hesitates to kill Rinaldo, whose songs once touched the King's heart - this scruple proves costly, as Rinaldo manages to stab him before being killed. Ascalante, his goal in reach, moves to finish off the wounded king, but is killed by Thoth-Amon's demon before he can strike, and the demon is then slain by Conan with the shard of his enchanted sword.

Conan's courtiers hesitate to believe his tale, as the demon has evaporated, until they spot the shape its blood has left on the floor.



Monday, December 15, 2025

Jump - MTG 4E

 

Now how awesome is that? A swordsman is jumping up and over the castle wall just to try to kill you. You HAVE to admire the guts that takes ;-) This is one of the instantly recognizable cards to anybody who was playing back then. It was used a lot because it was so effective and so cheap. And it gave you a really good feeling when you played it and your opponent had no flyers and so you smashed him in the face with your biggest creature :-D Now that was good old fashioned Magic...


Sunday, December 14, 2025

Real Tigers (Slough House #3) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: Real Tigers
Series: Slough House #3
Author: Mick Herron
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Thriller
Pages: 261
Words: 97K
Publish: 2016



Nobody from the Slow Horses dies in this book. I kept waiting until the very end. Now, Catherine Standish does quit at the end, which I assume means Herron wrote her out of the series, but she didn’t die. I was happy with that. But man, it was almost as gut wrenching to see her quit because of everything that happened, all because she was in Slough House. She had had enough and I for one don’t blame her.

This whole book, and the title, come from the term Tiger Team, which is a stress test of an intelligence agency by a 3rd party, to really put it to the test. Kind of like how a bank will hire people to try to break in to find their weak spots, so they can fix them. The problem is, the Tiger Team ends up having their own agenda and that is why this is called Real Tigers, as they slipped the leash and are wicked dangerous. Well, dangerous to certain people, namely political people. Speaking of political…

These books are inherently political, since they deal with the UK Intelligence Agencies, so that is not a problem. My problem is when Herron skates right close to “real life” with his politics. There is a character that is based on Boris Johnson. Now, I know almost nothing about UK politics, but even I know who BJ was and what he looked like and acted like. I don’t want real life to impinge on my escapist reading, thank you very much.

Other than that, and it wasn’t surprising an author let himself get carried away by his personal politics, I am still enjoying these Slough House books. I just wish I could watch the tv series based on these, I bet it would be good stuff.

★★★☆☆


From the Publisher & Reddit:

Slough House is the Intelligence Service outpost for failed spies, former high-fliers now dubbed the 'slow horses'. Catherine Standish, one of their number, worked in Regent's Park long enough to understand treachery, double-dealing and stabbing in the back, and she's known Jackson Lamb long enough to have learned that old sins cast long shadows. And she also knows that chance encounters never happen to spooks, even recovering drunks whose careers have crashed and burned.

What she doesn't know is why anyone would target her.

So whoever's holding her hostage, it can't be personal. It must be about Slough House. Most likely, it's about Jackson Lamb. And say what you like about Lamb, he'll never leave a joe in the lurch.

He might even be someone you could trust with your life.

Standish gets kidnapped by a Tiger team that is orchestrated by Peter Judd (Lady Di gave him the idea) and it goes awry when he tries to call it off. Sean Donovan one of the guys in the Tiger team has other motives. His real intention is to get a file that exposes the real reason his partner Alison Dunn died. This file can ruin Tierney.


Friday, December 12, 2025

Black Mountain (Isaiah Coleridge #2) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Black Mountain
Series: Isaiah Coleridge #2
Author: Laird Barron
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Thriller
Pages: 296
Words: 83K
Publish: 2019



Isaiah Coleridge is not a good man. He might not beat his girlfriend, or hit her kid but that is about the only redeeming factor I can give in his favor. It’s not just that he came from a bad past, it is that he never truly broke from it, nor, and more damning in my opinion, does he really want to. He was a mob enforcer who brutalized and killed people and he sees that as no different a job than me surveying a piece of land for a subdevelopment. He does his thing to bad people, but that doesn’t make him a good guy. This was really made clear to me in this book. Coleridge isn’t even an anti-hero. He’s the protagonist of this series, but he’s just a lesser villain than the guys he goes after.

The guy he goes after is one whackadoodle of a villain this time too. He’s a rich boy serial killer whose family killed an innocent young man and sculpted the psycho to look like him and take over his life. He ended up doing dirty black work for the government and then went off reservation and started killing for fun again. Now he has an apprentice and it’s up to Coleridge to bring it all to light. It is seriously messed up. Throw in some illegal corporate medical work with fungus and you have something even the X-Files wouldn’t have dreamt up.

While I can’t honestly say that I “enjoyed” my time while reading this, I didn’t go into it each time dreading it or wishing it was over. Faint praise, I know, but I’m trying to stay positive. There is one more Coleridge book and after that, I’ll be done with the author.

★★★☆☆


From the Publisher:

When a small-time criminal named Harold Lee turns up in the Ashokan reservoir--sans a heartbeat, head, or hands--the local mafia capo hires Isaiah Coleridge to look into the matter. The mob likes crime, but only the crime it controls . . . and as it turns out, Lee is the second independent contractor to meet a bad end on the business side of a serrated knife. One such death can be overlooked. Two makes a man wonder.

A guy in Harold Lee's business would make his fair share of enemies, and it seems a likely case of pure revenge. But as Coledrige turns over more stones, he finds himself dragged into something deeper and more insidious than he could have imagined, in a labyrinthine case spanning decades. At the center are an heiress moonlighting as a cabaret dancer, a powerful corporation with high-placed connections, and a serial killer who may have been honing his skills since the Vietnam War. . .


Thursday, December 11, 2025

Banquets of the Black Widowers (The Black Widowers #4) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Banquets of the Black Widowers
Series: The Black Widowers #4
Authors: Isaac Asimov
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 153
Words: 72K
Publish: 1984


Asimov shakes things up, just a little, by having the club members either break rules or do something completely out of the ordinary here. Not for every story, but enough. It would be like if Rex Stout had his character Nero Wolfe actually leave his house (which while Wolfe states that he won’t leave his house, his actions give the lie to that more often than not, sigh). It shook things up as the routine was broken and that was a good thing. The bickering and outright fighting amongst the members is really getting on my nerves. I’ve got one more book of these to read and then I’ll have finished the series.

I think my favorite story this time around was “The Driver” about a bunch of egghead scientists and a SETI convention and some low IQ driver getting killed. Turns out the driver was pretending and he was a Soviet spy and he let slip one bit of info that would have given him away, so his Soviet Masters had him done away with. It might have been a Cold War, but nobody was phutzing around, that was for sure.

Several of the other stories all revolve around human nature, as Asimov perceived it. I don’t see eye to eye with him on that issue all the time so those stories fell really flat for me. They also irritated me because they involved people being really stupid and even when I think that people ARE stupid, doesn’t mean I want to read about it. I mean, you like being healthy right? So do you want to read stories about weeping, suppurating boils and sores, oozing pus? Yeah, me neither.

★★★☆☆


From Wikipedia.org

"Introduction"

  • "Sixty Million Trillion Combinations" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, 5 May 1980) – A paranoid mathematician who suspects that his work on Goldbach's conjecture has been stolen. When the authorities demand his cooperation, he sulkily gives a clue to the code which protects his work on a shared computer, suspecting that no one could possibly guess or deduce the code. Fortunately for the agencies who need this information, the Black Widowers are able to come up with the code, purely because one member shares a trait with the mathematician.

  • "The Woman in the Bar" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, 30 June 1980) – the Black Widowers have as their dinner guest Darius Just, the main character from Asimov's mystery novel Murder at the ABA. Darius finds himself in danger of violent reprisals when he tries to help a frightened woman (he knows she is frightened, but he can have no idea by whom or why). She has given him crucial nonverbal communication clues which the Black Widowers solve. Asimov states that he "thought up" this Black Widowers story just for this character.[4]

  • "The Driver" – the Black Widowers consider the mysterious death of a chauffeur at a SETI Institute conference.

  • "The Good Samaritan" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, 10 September 1980) – in a controversial break with tradition, a woman is invited to attend the men-only club.

  • "The Year of the Action" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, 1 January 1981) – a historical clue is solved about a comic opera, "The Pirates of Penzance," by Gilbert and Sullivan.

  • "Can You Prove It?" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, 17 June 1981) – the guest describes his arrest and interrogation behind the Iron Curtain and is unable to explain why he was released.

  • "The Phoenician Bauble" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, May 1982) – a valuable archaeological artefact has been lost.

  • "A Monday in April" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, May 1983) – concerns a matter of trivia about ancient Rome. The evenings guest feels that his girlfriend cheated in a competition, but Henry's solution casts doubt on that presumption.

  • "Neither Brute Nor Human" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, April 1984) – the story requires solving a riddle about a poem by Edgar Allan Poe.

  • "The Redhead" (Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, October 1984) – a woman disappears into thin air.

  • "The Wrong House" – the guest is unable to determine which of his neighbours has been counterfeiting money after witnessing their operation while drunk.

  • "The Intrusion" – an uninvited guest crashes the party and asks the Black Widowers for help in finding the man who took advantage of his developmentally challenged sister.



Wednesday, December 10, 2025

Jane Austen: Evelyn 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Evelyn
Series: ----------
Author: Jane Austen
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Satire
Pages: 32
Words: 10K
Publish: 1792


This was an over the top satire about the amiability of the English. It also satirizes most of the other subjects that Austen touches on as an adult in her later novels. The power of love, and people dying from it. The power of family, and people ignoring theirs.

The title is taken from the town that the main character lives in. Evelyn is not a woman, despite what the cover I have used here tries to make you think. I suspect someone saw the title, thought “Aha, a woman’s name” and slapped a woman on a background and tried to sell this on Amazon or Kobo or something. That’s the danger of not doing your research. On that note, in the state of Pennsylvania, there is a town called Intercourse. Right next to it is another town called Peach Bottom. Imagine what the cover to those (imaginary) books would look like! Certainly wouldn’t be Jane Austen approved.

When I read the previous juvenilia story by Austen (Catharine) I wondered if I could keep on going with these juvenilia shorts. Evelyn has shown me that I can. I simply have to frame my reading in the appropriate context, ie, Austen was a child or teenager when she wrote these for her family and are not meant to be judged as her novels are, being publicly and intentionally released.

★★★☆☆


From CourseHero.com

The story's title is the name of a tranquil, idyllic town that exists without illness or unhappiness. A man named Mr. Gower is passing through the town and falls in love with it. He decides he must find a house in town for himself. He stops at a small inn to ask about any available houses. He learns that there are no available houses because so many people love the town of Evelyn. Mr. Gower is approached by Mrs. Willis before he can despair and she tells him about a possible house for him. Mr. Gower quickly travels to this house to meet the owners Mr. Webb and Mrs. Webb. Mr. Gower meets Mrs. Webb who is incredibly generous and provides a feast and a generous sum of money to Mr. Gower immediately upon his arrival. Mr. Webb enters and asks Mr. Gower what else they can do. Mr. Gower asks for their house and grounds which both Webbs agree to without question. The Webbs introduce their daughters as they prepare to leave. Mr. Gower falls in love with the oldest Webb daughter Maria Webb and they are married the next day.

The couple is incredibly happy for several months until Mr. Gower is reminded of his sister. Mr. Gower's sister Rose fell in love with a high-ranking man named Henry but Henry's father did not approve of the match. Henry was forced to travel to the Isle of Wight by ship before the couple could marry. The ship was wrecked and Henry died. Rose is so overcome with this loss that Mr. Gower wants to do something to ease her pain. Mr. Gower decides to go to Henry's father and ask for a portrait of Henry for Rose. Unfortunately Mr. Gower gets distracted by the beauty and peace of Evelyn before completing his mission. Mr. Gower feels he must complete his mission but first sends a letter home to make sure his sister is still alive. The letter Mr. Gower receives in response tells him that Rose died six weeks earlier. Mr. Gower is overwhelmed by the loss but sets off to learn whether Henry's father would approve of the match if the two lovers were still alive. Henry's father states that he would not. Mr. Gower returns home to find that Maria died a few hours after he left. Mr. Gower is upset, makes arrangements for her funeral, and returns to his family home to be comforted.

Mr. Gower enters his family home and he sees his sister Rose sitting on the couch. He learns that Rose lied about her death to make Henry's family feel bad. She actually learned of Henry's death only a few days earlier when she met Mr. Davenport. Mr. Davenport brought the news of Henry's death and proposed to Rose on the spot. She accepted and the couple was married. Mr. Gower is shocked but congratulates the happy couple and walks to a local inn for a drink. At the inn Mr. Gower meets Mrs. Willis again and immediately asks for her hand in marriage. She agrees and the couple returns to Evelyn. Mr. Gower writes a letter after the couple arrives back home explaining the death of Maria to Mr. and Mrs. Webb. The Webbs' response is short and appreciative and does not show any sign of grief or sadness.



Tuesday, December 09, 2025

Trio for Blunt Instruments (Nero Wolfe #38) 4Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Trio for Blunt Instruments
Series: Nero Wolfe #38
Author: Rex Stout
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 198
Words: 72K
Publish: 1964


This was an enjoyable trio of novellas about Archie and Wolfe getting involved with “dames” and solving the various mysteries. I have to admit, I am not such a fan of these collections of novellas versus the full novels. Next time I go through the Wolfe series, I plan on reading each novella on its own and reviewing just it.

This was published in 1964 and the first Wolfe novel, Fer De Lance, was published in 1934. You can tell the difference in the culture that each book was written in. It is kind of shocking to see the changes in just 30 years. But then I realize what 30 years has done in my life time, so I really shouldn’t be surprised.

★★★★☆


From Wikipedia

Kill Now—Pay Later

Wolfe's aging Greek bootblack is accused of murder and Wolfe feels he owes him something since he (apparently) listens eagerly to Wolfe's dissertations on ancient Greek culture during every shoe-shining session and moreover has told the police that "Wolfe is a great man"


Murder Is Corny

The story, apart from its crime detection aspects, is a story about how a simple, very beautiful, country girl comes to the big city, enters the world of high fashion, but cannot escape the risqué side of big city life. Nor is the country life in Putnam County devoid of moral failings, and they both play a part in the final resolution of this story.


Blood Will Tell

Archie is sorting through the mail one Tuesday morning when an unusual envelope catches his attention. Bearing the return address of composer James Neville Vance, the envelope contains a bloodstained tie and a note for Archie to keep it until Vance makes contact with him. After receiving a call claiming to be from Vance instructing him to destroy the envelope and contents, Archie heads to Vance's apartment to investigate.

Vance denies any knowledge about the envelope, though he admits the tie is one of nine he owns, designed uniquely for him, adding that one is missing and another was gifted to a friend. When the janitor and a patrol officer come to ask Vance for access to the apartment belonging to Bonny & Martin Kirk, Archie joins them; together, they discover Bonny's corpse, head smashed in with a vodka bottle.

The next day, a disheveled Martin Kirk comes to the brownstone to hire Wolfe, who immediately takes him on as a client. Kirk reveals that Vance gifted him one of his neckties two months ago and that Bonny was a serial adulterer, with one of her lovers being another neighbor, Paul Fougere. During the conversation, Paul's wife Rita arrives, having followed Kirk. Wolfe sends Kirk home to look for the necktie and speaks with Rita, who reveals that she knew about the affair and that she is in love with Kirk.

Kirk calls and informs them that the necktie is missing; he and Rita decide to visit Vance to ask him about the envelope. The meeting turns bloody when Paul shows up unannounced, and Kirk accuses Paul of killing Bonny out of jealousy. After the fight subsides, Sergeant Stebbins arrives to take Kirk in for questioning.

Wolfe asks Archie to use the threat of a defamation lawsuit in order to bring Paul in, and the Fougeres do come to the brownstone four hours later. They find out from Paul that Vance has also been pining for Bonny.

As the conversation ends, Archie and Wolfe independently determine the identity of the culprit. When Inspector Cramer arrives, Wolfe lets him in on their deductions, asking him to hold the culprit for question and sending Archie, Saul, Fred, and Orrie to search that person's residence. While there, they find not only the clue that confirms their deductions but also a grisly trophy of the crime.



Zenya (Dumarest #11) 3Stars

  This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards...