Friday, July 21, 2023

Xenocide (Enderverse #3) 2Stars

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress, Blogspot, & Librarything by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Xenocide
Series: Enderverse #3
Authors: Orson Card
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 671
Words: 182K

Man, when I read “The Detective” earlier this month I thought I had done my time in Navel Gazing Land and would be scot free. Phawwww. Card must have read “The Detective” and thought “Hold my beer Thorp, I’ll show you how to really examine all that lint in your belly button”. We also get an indepth look at Morman metaphysics and their ideas on what a “soul” is.

And Ender, now in his 60’s or 70’s I believe, is still so passive that he does nothing as his wife of 30’ish years just walks away from him. He just shrugs and is like “oh well, she is hurting really bad so I just have to understand her and let her be”. It made me sick. You fight for your marriage, you little cowardly sad sack of crap. I now have zero respect for Ender as a character. My respect was pretty low after the last book, but after this, he is now dead to me.

I do not understand how this Ender collection became so popular. It has zero connection with Ender’s Game and really, it’s boring and depressing. I have two more books in this series and I am seriously debating whether I actually want to continue or not. Forcing myself to read Shakespeare is one thing, trying to do the same for Orson Scott Card is quite another.

★★☆☆☆


From Wikipedia.com

On Lusitania, Ender finds a world where humans and pequeninos and the Hive Queen could all live together. However, Lusitania also harbors the descolada, a virus that kills all humans it infects, but which the pequeninos require in order to become adults. The Starways Congress so fears the effects of the descolada, should it escape from Lusitania, that they have ordered the destruction of the entire planet, and all who live there. With the Fleet on its way, a second xenocide seems inevitable.[2]

Lusitania

Following the events of Speaker for the Dead, a group of characters are depicted living as members of a Brazilian Catholic human colony on Lusitania, a unique planet inhabited by the only other two known species of sentient alien life: the Pequeninos “little ones” and the Hive Queen. The pequeninos are native to the planet, while the Hive Queen was transplanted to this world by Ender, partly in penance for his near-total destruction of her Formic species in Ender’s Game.

After the rebellion of the small human colony on Lusitania in Speaker for the Dead to protect the future of the intelligent alien species, Starways Congress sends a fleet to Lusitania to regain control, which will take several decades to reach its destination. Valentine Wiggin, under her pseudonym Demosthenes, publishes a series of articles revealing the presence of the “Little Doctor” planet-annihilating weapon on the Fleet. Demosthenes calls it the “Second Xenocide,” as using the weapon will result in the obliteration of the only known intelligent alien life. She also claims it to be a brutal crackdown of any colony world striving for autonomy from Starways Congress. Public anger spreads through humanity, and rebellions nearly ensue on several colonies.

After quelling much public discontent, Starways Congress finishes their analysis of the situation while the fleet is en route. Fearing the Descolada virus, further rebellions by colony worlds, and other possible unknown political motives, Starways Congress attempts to relay an order to the fleet to annihilate Lusitania upon arrival. After conferring with friends on whether a cause is worth dying for, Jane (a compassionate AI living in the interstellar ansible communication network) shuts off transmissions to the fleet to block the order. As a consequence of this action, she risks her eventual discovery and death, should the government shut down and wipe the interplanetary network. No known smaller computer system can house her consciousness.

On Lusitania itself, Ender attempts to find solutions to the looming catastrophes of the Congressional fleet, Descolada virus, and conflicts among the humans and intelligent alien species. Much on Lusitania centers around the Ribeira family, including Ender’s wife Novinha and her children. Novinha and Elanora, the mother-daughter team responsible for most of the biological advances countering the complex Descolada virus, are unsure if they can manufacture a harmless replacement virus. Conflicts arise on whether they should even do so, since the Descolada is intrinsically tied in with the life cycles of all Lusitanian organisms and may even be sentient itself. In addition, to try to devise methods to escape the planet, Lusitania’s leading, troublemaking physicist Grego is persuaded by Ender to research faster-than-light travel, despite Grego scoffing at the idea. The third biologista of the family, Quara, is convinced that the Descolada is an intelligent, self-aware species, and deserves attempts from the humans for communication and preservation. An additional sibling and Catholic priest, Quim (Father Estevão), is determined to use faith and theology to head off another form of xenocide: a group of warmongering Pequenino who wish to wipe out all Earthborn life via starship, carrying the deadly Descolada within them.

World of Path

Starways Congress wants its fleet back. After all else fails, it sends the dilemma of the fleet’s impossible disappearance to several citizens of the world of Path, a cultural planetary enclave modeled on early China. Path’s culture centers on the godspoken – those who hear the voices of the gods in the form of irresistible compulsions, and are capable of significantly superior intelligence. It later becomes clear that the godspoken of Path are victims of a cruel government project: granted great intelligence by genetic modification, they were also shackled with a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder to control their loyalty. The experiment is set in a culture bound by five dictates – obey the gods, honor the ancestors, love the people, serve the rulers, then serve your self. This is a further safeguard against rebellion. The superintelligent godspoken are considered the most devout and holy of all citizens, and any disloyal thoughts in a godspoken’s mind are immediately suppressed by overwhelming obsessive-compulsive behavior, believed to be a sign from the gods the thoughts are wrong. The most respected godspoken on Path is Han Fei-Tzu, for devising a treaty to prevent the rebellion of several colony worlds after the articles published by Demosthenes. Great things are expected of his daughter and potential successor Han Qing-jao, “Gloriously Bright”. While doubting the existence of the gods himself, Han Fei-Tzu promised his dying wife he would raise Qing-jao with an unwavering belief in the godspoken. The two of them are tasked by Starways Congress with deciphering the disappearance of the Lusitania Fleet. Han Qing-jao’s secret maid, Si Wang-mu, aids her in this task, her intelligence (partially) unfettered by the rigid caste system.

The young and naive Qing-jao eventually traces the identity of Demosthenes. Discovering that Demosthenes is Valentine Wiggin, Ender’s sister – but that Valentine has been on a starship en route to Lusitania for the last thirty years – Qing-Jao concludes that the only possible explanation is advanced computer software closely tied to the communication network. This software must be hiding Demosthenes and publishing her work, while also causing the disappearance of the Fleet. All but discovered, Jane reveals herself to Han Fei-tzu, Han Qing-jao and Si Wang-mu, telling them about their genetic slavery and begging forbearance on their report to Starways Congress.

Already harboring suspicions about the godspoken’s condition, Han Fei-tzu accepts the news of Congress’s atrocity, as does Si Wang-mu, but his daughter Han Qing-jao clings to her belief that Demosthenes and Jane are enemies of the gods. Feeling betrayed by her father, who is violently incapacitated by OCD from the disloyal thoughts, Qing-jao argues with Jane. Jane threatens shutting off all communications from Path, but Si Wang-mu realizes this would eventually lead to the planet’s destruction by Starways Congress. Understanding Jane to be truly alive and compassionate, through tears Si Wang-mu states Jane will not block the report. However, Qing-jao compares Jane to the servants in Path’s caste system, merely a computer program designed to serve humans, containing neither autonomy nor awareness.

Knowing she has exhausted her last possibilities of stopping Qing-jao, Jane sacrifices her future and life, unwilling to bring harm to Qing-jao or the people of Path. A triumphant Qing-jao reports the knowledge of Demosthenes, Jane, and the fate of the Fleet to Starways Congress. Qing-jao recommends a coordinated date set several months from the present, to prepare the massive undertaking of setting up clean computers across the interplanetary network, after which the transition to a new system will kill Jane and allow Congress full control again. Allowing the message to be sent, Jane restores communication with the Fleet, and Congress re-issues the order for the Fleet to obliterate Lusitania.

Han Fei-tzu recovers from the incapacitation of his OCD, despairing over his daughter’s actions, and his unwitting aid in deeply brainwashing her to serve Congress. He and Si Wang-mu assist Jane and those on Lusitania in finding solutions to their impending catastrophes. Planter, a Pequenino on Lusitania, offers his life for an experiment to determine whether the Descolada gives Pequeninos sentience, or if they have the ability innately. Eventually, Elanora Ribeira is able to come up with a possible model for a “recolada”: a refit of the Descolada that allows the native life to survive and retain self-awareness, but doesn’t seek to kill all other life forms. With the available equipment, however, the recolada is impossible to make, and they are running out of time against the soon-to-arrive Fleet.

Outside

While this research takes place, tragedies occur on Lusitania. Father Estevão Ribeira, the priest attempting to sway a distant warmongering sect of the Pequeninos from their goal of attacking humanity, is killed by the Fathertree Warmaker, who took Quim hostage and denied him the food with the anti-descolada chemicals, so the descolada infected and killed him on the 7th day of being hostage. Grego Ribeira spurs a riot of humans to burn down the warmaker’s forest, but the violent mob gets out of his control, and rampages through the neighboring Pequenino forest instead, massacring many of its inhabitants – the original friends and allies of humanity. Under the terms of the treaty with Pequeninos, the Hive Queen is brought in to hold the peace, setting a perimeter guard of hive drones around the human colony and preventing further escalation of violence between the two groups. Grego is locked in jail, despite eventually stepping between the surviving Pequeninos and his own riot. The town realizes their horrific rage, and constructs a chapel surrounding the fallen priest’s grave, trying to find penance for their actions.

Finally, a breakthrough is made. Knowing the Ansible communication network allows instantaneous transfer of information, and through knowledge of how the Hive Queen gives sentience to child queens, Jane, Grego, and Olhado discover the “Outside”. The Outside is a spacetime plane where aiúas initially exist. (Aiúa is the term given to the pattern defining any specific structure of the universe, whether a particular atom, a star, or a sentient consciousness.) Formic hive queens are called from Outside after birth, giving awareness to the new body. Jane is able to contain within her vast computing power the pattern defining the billions of atoms and overall structure comprising a simple “starship” (little more than a room), with passengers included, and take them Outside. By bringing them Outside, where relative location is nonexistent, then back “Inside” at a different spot in the physical universe, instantaneous travel has been achieved, finally matching the instantaneous communication of the Ansibles and Formics. They quickly arrange to take Ender, Ela, and Miro to Outside. While Ela is Outside, she is able to create the recolada virus, which is a safe replacement of the descolada, and a cure to the godspoken genetic defect. Miro envisions his body as it was before he was crippled by paralysis, and upon arrival in the Outside, his consciousness is contained within a new, restored body. Ender discovers, however, the surreal unwitting creation of a new “Valentine” and new “Peter Wiggin” from his subconscious, who embody idealized forms of his altruistic and power-hungry sides.

The recolada begins its spread across Lusitania, converting the formerly lethal virus into a harmless aid to native life. The cure to the people of Path’s genetic-controlling defect is distributed, yet Han Fei-tzu is tragically unable to convince his daughter Qing-jao this was the true course of action. Confronted with the possibility of being lied to all her life and dooming many sentient species to destruction, or an alternative of believing all she ever loved and trusted has betrayed her – Demosthenes, her father, her friend, her world – Qing-jao instead continues her godspoken rite of woodgrain tracing until her death and is honored by those on Path who still believe in the gods as the last true godspoken. She is elevated to god status after her death. Si Wang-mu sets off with Peter to take control over Starways Congress to stop the Fleet closing in on Lusitania. The new Valentine-persona journeys to find a planet to which the population of Lusitania can evacuate. The stage is set for the final book of the four-part series, Children of the Mind.

Thursday, July 20, 2023

Groo and the Siege (Groo the Wanderer #19) 3.5Stars

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot, by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Groo and the Siege
Series: Groo the Wanderer #19
Author: Sergio Aragones
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 24
Words: 2K


Hahahahahahaa! Grooella is trying to get her castle back and of course Groo tries to help. With predictable results. Of course, even when Grooella tries to kill Groo by having him shot by arrows, he manages to escape. What a scamp! 😉

And the funny thing is, the castle still isn’t recovered by the end and so Grooella makes sure to tell us that this IS STILL NOT THE END.

This reminds me of the Alcatraz vs the Evil Librarians series by Brandon Sanderson. Each of the Smedry’s had a power that was utterly ridiculous, but they all found ways to make use of it. Everyone in this comic keeps trying to use Groo as a conventional weapon when what they need to do is some very unconventional thinking. Of course, then things wouldn’t be nearly as funny 😀

★★★✬☆


From Bookstooge.blog

Grooella is besieging her own castle to take it back from the cominos. Groo attempts to help with creating a catapult and destroys it. He attempts to dig some tunnels under the castle walls and ends up digging under Grooella’s army, nearly destroying them.

There are also some flashback scenes of Groo and Grooella as kids where Groo is attempting to play with Grooella and her friends. Every attempt ends in disaster.

Wednesday, July 19, 2023

The King of the Swords (Eternal Champion: Corum #3) 4Stars

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: The King of the Swords
Series: Eternal Champion: Corum #3
Author: Michael Moorcock
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 127
Words: 45K

While I still enjoyed this, I did not find the story as engaging as the previous two. Part of that was just how weak the gods of Law are. They control 10 of the 15 planes of existence and yet the single god of Chaos is more powerful alone then all of the gods of Law combined. They came across as weak and effete. So when I found out at the end that Kwll and his brother Rhynn had killed ALL the gods, both of Chaos and Law, I didn’t shed a tear. It did make me wonder what that meant for the Cosmic Balance, as Kwll seemed to go out of his way to emphasize how he and Rhynn didn’t believe in the Cosmic Balance and thus weren’t under control by the rules of it.

That kind of philosophizing permeated this book much more than in the previous two. Corum gets to meet Elric and Erekose (other incarnations of the Eternal Champion. Erekose is the only one who remembers every incarnation though and maaaaan, is he a whiny pants cry baby) and Moorcock waxes on (yes Mr Miyagi!) about the nature of reality, blah, blah, blah. I think the ideas here are great for teens and young adults to be exposed to, because thinking about the nature of reality is important. People are ignoring biological facts today, which is reality, and are reaping the consequences by going insane.

We do get to see Corum go whizzing around in one of the flying boats and boy howdy, does he go all over the place. He travels his own world, he travels to other planes of existence and has adventures. He even goes to Limbo. I would say this ends happily with him and Rhalina being at peace, but knowing there is another trilogy to come means Corum is going to get boned somehow. Eternal Champions are Eternally Unhappy.

Why Moorcock chose that line of reasoning is still a mystery to me. Maybe it was pure marketing? When you’re writing for the teen and YA crowd, tortured anguished heros usually sell better. I’d like to believe that he had better reasons than that but I don’t care enough to find out. I don’t even know if there are any biographies on the man. He is just a name on the cover to me and I suspect it will be better for me and everyone, if he stays that way.

★★★★☆


From Wikipedia.com

A spell – determined to have been cast by the forces of Chaos – forces the inhabitants of Corum’s plane to war with each other (including the City in the Pyramid). Desperate to stop the slaughter, Corum, Rhalina and Jhary-a-Conel travel to the last five planes, ruled by Mabelode, the King of the Swords. Rhalina is taken hostage by the forces of Chaos and Corum has several encounters with the forces of Chaos, including Earl Glandyth-a-Krae.

Corum also meets two other aspects of the Eternal Champion: Elric and Erekosë, with all three seeking the mystical city of Tanelorn for their own purposes. After a brief adventure in the “Vanishing Tower”, the other heroes depart and Corum and Jhary arrive at their version of Tanelorn. Corum discovers one of the “Lost Gods”, the being Kwll, who is imprisoned and cannot be freed until whole. Corum offers Kwll his hand, on the condition that he aid them against Mabelode. Kwll accepts the terms, but reneges on the bargain until persuaded to assist. Corum is also stripped of his artificial eye, which belongs to Rhynn – actually the mysterious giant Corum had previously encountered. Kwll transports Corum and Jhary to the court of Mabelode, with the pair fleeing with Rhalina when Kwll directly challenges the Chaos God.

In a final battle Corum avenged his family by killing Glandyth-a-Krae and decimating the last of Chaos’ mortal forces. Kwll later located Corum and revealed that all the gods – of both Chaos and Law – have been slain in order to free humanity and allow it to shape its own destiny.

Tuesday, July 18, 2023

The New Verboten Word

I came home today after work and jumped online to check the blogosphere. I always check my spam comments folder because people get caught in there and I don’t want them to be stuck for days 🙂

Well, I had over 100 flipping spam comments all saying something along the lines of “This was a great movie, everyone should watch it” along with a link. I’ve had this going on for a couple of weeks, but never this bad.

When the russian spammers hit me, in cyrillic, I simply copy/pasted one of their letters and put that in my “goes straight to trash” rules for comments. However spammers work, once the programs realized the comments were going straight to trash without even the spam folder to check things, they dramatically decreased. To the point where I get 1 or 2 per week, instead of 10-20 every day. 2 years ago I did the same thing for the spanish spam bots. Just put in an upside down question mark and voila, they went straight to trash. And I haven’t been bothered by them for over a year now. So making spam comments go straight to the trash definitely stops them from mobbing my site.

Therefore, I am going to take some seriously drastic action, for about 2 months. I am going to make the word “movie” verboten in the comments here on Bookstooge.blog. Any comment with that word in it will go straight to the trash without me ever checking it. I realize this will cause chaos and confusion on my ever popular “movie review of the month” post, but I suspect you all have the intestinal fortitude to weather such vicissitudes. I also realize this will hit some bloggers much more than others and for that I apologize in advance. I just can’t think of any other way to deal with these forsaken movie link spammers.

I will re-examine things in September and make a decision about continuing this ban on the “M”-word then. I really hope that this drastic action will take care of things however.

Cheers!

Sunday, July 16, 2023

X-Men (2000 Movie)

X-Men, directed by Brian Singer, was one of the first really well done Super Hero movies. The first Spiderman movie hadn’t come out yet, but neither had such flops like Ghostrider, Elektra or the Fantastic Four duology. A brand new cinematic world was opening up to us.

And it was glorious!

I was rather hesitant to re-watch this, as I had such good memories and did NOT want to sully them; Marvel has done that well enough on its own. But my goodness, I had so much FUN watching this.

It definitely helped that much of the storyline was familiar to me from the 90’s X-Men comics. But it was a comic book and it just reveled in it. I mean, Magneto has a massive mutant making machine already installed in the torch of the Statue of Liberty? Come on, that’s ridiculous. And it worked perfectly because it is exactly how badguys always operate in the comics. This was not a Zack Snyder grimfest or deconstructionist dystopia. Singer has a love of the goodguys kicking butt, overcoming great odds and looking good doing it 🙂 It also wasn’t 3hrs long. Ain’t nobody got time for that!

While I have enjoyed the Infinity War story arc that the MCU took us on, by the end I was ready for it to be done. I was ready for standalone movies with standalone stories. Kind of like this movie in fact. Which might explain just why I enjoyed it so much. While there are 2 sequels, this could easily be watched as a standalone. That really appeals to me.

So if you are a comic book fan and you want to watch a superhero film that is just plain fun and gives you a good time, watch X-Men.

Saturday, July 15, 2023

Blogshido: I Know Post-fu!

While Blogshido is as varied as the people who practice this ancient art, the core of the discipline has always been the same. You can remove the Monthly Kata and still practice Blogshido. You can even ignore the venerable, honorable and most inspiring Taekommentdo and still practice Blogshido. But if you do not practice Post-fu, then you are not practicing Blogshido.

Some Masters of Blogshido, when practicing Post-fu, will pour out their very life essence into it, an artistic outpouring. You can almost feel the blood, the sweat, the tears, the absolute agony that went into the creation of their mastepiece of Post-fu. You know you are watching something special, something never to be repeated even while longing to perform it so well yourself. The downfall of this kind of practice in Post-fu is that the artist themselves know they will never reach such artistic heights again. It can easily turn into a self-defeating spiral of doom instead of a celebration of something wonderful.

Other Masters of Post-fu take a much more workmanlike attitude towards it. They make posts like they make a bologna sandwich. Bread, mayo, bologna, cheese, bam, put it all together, wham, done. Eat and enjoy. And they can do this day after day, week after week, month after month and even sometimes, year after year. The audience isn’t wowed, they are not moved to tears, nor are their hearts shattered. But they get a nutritious and filling bologna sandwich every day (well, as nutritious as a bologna sandwich can be anyway!)

A grounded Master of Blogshido will know which style suits them best for writing. But they will also know the proper balance in the choices they make of which blogs to follow. If I follow 100 Workmanlike Masters of Post-fu, while my Taekommentdo might become second to none through practice, when will I have time to practice my own Post-fu? And if I follow 100 Artistic Masters, who only post once a year, that sets an impossibly high bar for myself when I do go to practice Post-fu.

Personally, I only follow people who practice Post-fu at least once a month. Now there are always special circumstances and that is fine, but if someone isn’t practicing once a month on a consistent basis, I don’t consider them a follower of Blogshido anymore. How can I call you a Sandwich Maker if you never make sandwiches? And don’t even try to pull that “There is no sandwich” crap on me, Neo tried it with the spoon and look what happened to him, he got Matrix Resurrections. I trust that is warning enough for you all.

Friday, July 14, 2023

Kill for Me (Victor the Assassin #8) 4Stars

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Kill for Me
Series: Victor the Assassin #8
Authors: Tom Wood
Rating: 4 of 5 Stars
Genre: Action/Adventure
Pages: 364
Words: 114K

Victor gets involved in a Guatemalan drug cartel war between two sisters. And dates a DEA (drug enforcement agency) agent. I was sure she was going to die, but color me surprised, she not only survives but gets a big score, thanks (all unknowingly of course) to Victor.

This felt like a very different Victor book. Thinking about it though, each book has never been a clone of the previous ones. Here, Victor has shed his chains to both the US and the UK intelligence agencies and is trying to live his life anonymously again. I’m not sure that’s possible, but the very fact that the token romance girl actually survived this time throws my every calculation off now. And that’s a good thing. Being a predictable author is as bad as being a predictable assassin.

I saw the one double cross, mainly because it was so obvious that even I couldn’t miss it. The other two, I kind of suspected but wasn’t sure so it was a nice little surprise to see how they all worked out.

Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed this. I am not sure why I enjoyed it as much as I did, but I think the lack of world politics and intelligence agencies played a big part. Give me the Pure Assassin of Death, not some chained lackey of da’ Man….

★★★★☆


From the Publisher

Lethal assassin Victor lands in the middle of a Guatemalan cartel war in the latest nonstop thriller from the international bestselling author of The Final Hour.

Victor is the killer who always delivers…for the right price. And Heloise Espinosa, patron of Guatemala’s largest cartel, is ready and willing to pay him just that to eliminate the competition–her sister. Heloise has been battling Maria for control of the cartel in an endless and bloody war. Now Victor decides who survives. An easy job if it weren’t for the sudden target on his back.

Victor’s not the only one on the hunt. Someone else has Maria in their crosshairs and will do anything to get the kill. In the middle of cartel territory with enemies closing in from all sides, Victor must decide where to put the bullet before one is placed in his head. His only chance at survival is to team up with the one person who may be as deadly as he is…

Thursday, July 13, 2023

The Dragon Slayer (Bone #20-27) 3Stars

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: The Dragon Slayer
Series: Bone #20-27
Author: Jeff Smith
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Graphic Novel
Pages: 176
Words: 8K

What a world of difference. I read this omnibus and instead of feeling angry and pissed off at Smith for being a jerk whose face I wanted to punch in, I actually enjoyed this.

Unfortunately, Smith’s proclivity for stretching things out is still quite prominent, but reading a much bigger chunk of the story all at once helps negate the feeling that he’s shafting you as a customer.

I’m definitely going to stick to reading the omnibus versions instead of the standalones. But it still makes me wonder just how readers stood it back in the day. I was ready to commit murder and I know that there were times the issues were delayed, so people would have had to wait 2 months instead of just 1 month for a measly little no-nothing don’t advance storyline.

I really thought about upping this to 3.5stars, but wasn’t sure if my enjoyment was because I actually enjoyed the story itself or just the pure blessed relief of actually getting some forward momentum for the story because of the omnibus format. I decided to play it safe and we’ll see how things go next month.

I’m also going to be tagging these with the graphic novel tag instead of the comic tag. For me, the labels are more about the format than the actual content. Sure, this was still a comic. But anything over 75pages just seems more like a novel to me while a comic denotes anything from 20-70 pages, like the Asterix books for example.

★★★☆☆



From Boneville.fandom.com

Stick Eater

Ever since Phoney Bone claimed he was a dragon slayer, he was the town’s people’s favorite and he was on his way for winning the bet. A hooded figure rests in the Barrelhaven tavern who the villagers call a Stick-Eater. When Smiley comes to get receive payment from the stranger, Lucius advises him not to and gives the pilgrim his share on his behalf. Wendell didn’t believe it was wise to provide the stick-eater a meal claiming they were in cahoots with the dragons, when Lucius asked if he had any problem with it, Wendell answered no, but he would receive his beers from Smiley from now on.

Business

Fone Bone, Thorn, and Gran’ma Ben continue their trek to Barrelhaven. Upon reaching an overlook of the village, Fone Bone remarks that the Barrelhaven looks peaceful, to which Gran’ma Ben warns that “looks can be decieving.”

At the tavern, dragons are on the villagers’ minds. When approached by Lucius with an offer of another round, Wendell and Euclid refuse, but immediately accept an offer from Smiley, as do other patrons. Lucius becomes infuriated at the town’s obsession, and Phoney and Smiley muse over their plans, with Phoney admitting he has no plans to slay a dragon, as they aren’t really dangerous. When Jonathan Oaks orders from their end of the bar, Lucius confronts Phoney in the pantry. To Phoney’s protests, he plans to call off the bet, as he doesn’t find it worth riling up a mob, and because Phoney is disrespecting the Dragons’ wishes to remain hidden. Phoney challenges Lucius to tell the villagers the truth, but leaves him fuming when he makes no action to do so.

In the woods, Gran’ma suffers an attack of the Gitchy Feeling. The trio is ambushed by one of the Two Stupid Rat creatures.

Earth and Sky

The Two Stupid Rat Creatures bicker over whether to bake Fone Bone, Thorn, and Gran’ma Ben in a quiche, or make stew from their bones. They are interrupted by Gran’ma Ben, attacking them with her sword. They retreat, and Gran’ma gives Thorn her sword, which agitates the rat creatures. Gran’ma suggests that Thorn may be close to The Turning. She interrogates one of the Two Stupid Rat Creatures, who confesses that they have been ordered to evacuate the valley, but is interrupted by Kingdok, who knocks out Thorn and Fone Bone, and attacks Gran’ma Ben. Fone Bone comes to, and calls for the Dragon’s help.

Smiley hears Fone Bone’s faint calling, but Phoney has another problem – the customers are nursing their beers. The pair suggest various possibilities, and Smiley mentions the Midsummer’s Day Picnic, which Lucius kept secret from Phoney. Smiley and Wendell both hear Fone Bone calling, and a search party goes out to find them in the woods. Wendell and Euclid find blood all over the ground and trees.

Kingdok continues to throw Gran’ma Ben through the woods, hitting her against a tree and discussing how much he hates the Flat-Landers. As he is about to kill her, Thorn ambushes Kingdok and slices off his arm with Gran’ma’s sword. He suffers an attack of the Gitchy Feeling, and hallucinates Gran’ma and thorn as queen and princess respectively. He cries out, and the Two Stupid Rat Creatures escort him off into the night. Fone Bone finds Gran’ma Ben and Thorn, and dress Gran’ma’s wounds as she warns Thorn that the Lord of the Locusts is seeking her.

Council in the Dark

In the woods, Kingdok has collapsed and the Two Stupid Rat Creatures are in a panic. they try to stop the bleeding and one blames the other for attacking the trio. They realize what the Hooded One will do to them if Kingdok dies, but soon realize that he is the only one who knows they disobeyed the evacuation order, and if he dies the Hooded One will blame Thorn and Gran’ma Ben. They agree to flee and go into hiding, and they abandon Kingdok in the forest.

Thorn bandages Gran’ma Ben, who explains that Thorn is a Veni-Yan-Cari who can walk between the Realms of the Awaken and Dreaming. Fone Bone volunteers to defend Thorn, and Gran’ma Ben suggests that the Hooded One may be a rogue Disciple of Venu – an ancient religion that studies the dreams. She is afraid that the Hooded One will sacrifice either Thorn or Phoney to free the Lord of the Locusts, and decides to take Thorn to Atheia. Thorn refuses and lashes out at Gran’ma. Despite Gran’ma’s protests, Thorn storms off into the woods. Gran’ma gives Fone Bone her sword, and an amulet, and tells him to find Thorn and warn Lucius about the Lord of the Locusts. Fone Bone races after Thorn, and Gran’ma Ben runs into the forest.

Fone Bone gives Thorn the sword, and they reach Barrelhaven – which has been walled off. Jonathan Oaks explains that Lucius never came back from his search. Jon refuses to let Fone Bone and Thorn in, under orders from the new boss – Phoney Bone.

The Straggler

Once again, The Hooded One comes before the Locust. She reports that the men of Pawa have allied themselves with the Locust and the Rat creatures, that Thorn, the Red Dragon, the Bones, and Gran’ma Ben are all in Barrelhaven, and that Kingdok was badly wounded, which may mean Thorn is turning. The Hooded One questions the Locust’s plans, but the Locust assures her that it is her above all else who the Locust loves. If she frees him, she will never lose him again.

Fone Bone, Smiley Bone, and Thorn’s search party find no trace of Gran’ma Ben or Lucius, and Phoney invites Fone Bone to dinner. Thorn goes to sleep in the tower room, watched by the Hooded One. Fone Bone finds the big room of the bar converted to an extravagant dining hall. Phoney and Smiley admit their scheme to get out of their debt and back to Boneville in style, which Fone Bone refuses. He tries to explain to Phoney the issue with Thorn, but all his attempts are dismissed. He storms out, leaving Phoney and Smiley to revise their plan. Fone Bone encounters a baby rat creature, who leans on him, pinnign him against a tree.

Thorn dreams she is on a cliff with her grandmother, who enters a sinister cave. A hooded figure in the image of a young Gran’ma Ben beckons to her, and attempts to take her hand. She is interrupted by Fone Bone, who wakes Thorn up. He presents the cub to Thorn, who threatens to kill it if he doesn’t kick it out.

Deliver us these Laws

Jon sees Lucius approach the gate, and rouses Phoney and Smiley. The villagers clear the logs, and ask for word on Gran’ma Ben. Lucius admits he couldn’t find her. Fone Bone pulls Smiley away from the crowd, and takes him to the stables. Phoney greets Lucius, who is enraged at the new “security measures.” He realizes, however, that the village supports Phoney, and decides to sleep in the barn instead of Phoney’s offer of the kitchen.

Fone Bone shows Smiley the cub, whom he takes to immediately, feeding it a sandwich. Lucius enters the barn and Fone Bone gives him the amulet. Lucius realizes it’s the Nights of Lightning all over again, and Fone Bone explains why he was yelling the other night. Smiley wonders if Thorn will allow him to wear the crown.

Wendell notes that there never was a dragon in Barrelhaven, and that they shouldn’t be the ones trapped behind walls. The villagers agree that it’s time for Phoney to earn his keep.

Lucius, Fone Bone, and Smiley visit thorn, who breaks down in Lucius’s arms.

The Lord of the Locusts speaks through The Hooded one to the Rat Creatures and Pawans, and rallies them to take up arms against the Flat-Landers.

The Midsummer’s Day Plan

Phoney accuses Wendell of holding out on him, and travels the town taking taxes from the villagers.

Fone Bone argues that rat cub must go to the mountains, to be with the other rat creatures. Smiley suggest that they do it themselves. Thorn comes in to apologize for her behavior, and announces that she is returning to the farmhouse. Despite Fone Bone’s protests, she leaves the sword behind and leaves the barn. Fone Bone and Smiley follow her, but Smiley is distracted by Phoney making a speech about the morals of the village, and orders the townspeople to bring their valuables to him. Lucius admits that dragons exist, and Phoney accuses him of allying himself with them. Phoney announces that all the valuables will be used as bait to catch and kill a dragon. Lucius explains to Smiley that the only way to discover dragons for oneself is to be taught that they are make-believe. Fone Bone returns from the tavern without Thorn, and wonders to the whereabouts of Gran’ma Ben.

The Lord of the Locusts sends the Pawans and rat creatures to destroy their respective enemies, and sends Kingdok to capture Thorn and the Bones.

The Turning

Thorn leaves a letter for Fone Bone on her dresser and wanders off in search of the farmhouse. Fone Bone and Smiley jump the wall, and Smiley runs off with the cub, pursued by Fone Bone. Phoney orders Jon to get the wagons ready to go to the Dragon’s Stair and to search for Fone Bone and Smiley. He is confronted by Ted, who he tells about his plan to scam the village. Ted warns Phoney that his thieving days will catch up to him. He finds the barn empty, with nothing but Gran’ma’s sword. When he leaves, a mysterious hand takes the sword.

Thorn falls asleep in the forest, and four hooded figures place the sword in front of her and trigger a dream in which she is approached by the Great Red Dragon. She looks into a light and sees rat creatures. Then her grandmother, and then Fone Bone, but will not say if they are alright. Fed up, Thorn decides to go to her friends, to which the Dragon notes that she is already awake. She wakes up, and races back to the village.

Phoney prepares the cows to move out all the treasure, to the cheers of the villagers.

On the Dragon’s Stair

The group reaches the Dragon’s Stair, and Phoney orders the terrified villagers to set up a crude snare while he makes a trail with the treasure. He is confronted by Ted once more, who admits he wants Phone out of the valley as much as anybody. The snare triggers, and Phoney approaches the Great Red Dragon, caught in the trap. The Dragon admits to seeing the trap, thinking Phoney needed a dragon to fool the townspeople. The villagers tie the Dragon’s head down, and force a knife into Phoney’s hand, threatening to kill him if he doesn’t kill the Dragon. He is interrupted by Thorn, who demands to know what is happening. She orders Wendell to free the dragon and get the villagers ready to face the rat creatures. As they are arguing, one spots fire coming from their town, and mistakes it for the dragons. A group of rat creatures approach the crowd and Thorn faces them, accompanied by the four hooded figures who returned her sword. They push the rat creatures back, and Phoney frees the dragon who chases them off. Thorn orders the villagers to get their supplies, and takes off with Phoney to find Lucius back in the burning village. The shocked villagers prepare for war.

Wednesday, July 12, 2023

The Detective (Joe Leland #1) 2Stars

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Title: The Detective
Series: Joe Leland #1
Author: Roderick Thorp
Rating: 2 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fiction
Pages: 487
Words: 220K

Inner monologueing that, psycho-sexualization this, belly button lint beyond belief. I mean, some of the characters went on for pages and pages blabbing and blabbing and then they’d blab some more. The author would make very odd conversation connections that weren’t obvious to me as a reader and I really struggled to follow the thought processes. At the beginning Joe gets very upset that his wife left him a note asking some questions that they’d gone over the night before. It made zero sense to me why he was upset about it and it’s not explained, that I could see, why he was upset about it. Everything was referred to obliquely instead of head on. This book typifies everything I hate about books from the 60’s and 70’s. Bunch of pretentious, self-absorberd author replacement wankery.

The ONLY reason I read this is because the sequel is the novel on which Die Hard was based and I want to read that book. So when I learned it was the second book about Joe Leland, of course I had to read the first book. What kind of sicko only reads the second book in a duology, amirite? Those people might exist, but I am not one of them. After reading this, I almost wish I was though!

After I read the next book, I’ll never read another thing by Thorp if I can help it. I haven’t even looked up his body of work just so I can avoid it. I don’t care that much about him.

The final nail in the coffin was the ending. They figure out why the husband is dead and it’s a big fat reason and the book ends with the investigation just starting. Feth that! You don’t drag me through almost 500 pages and then just stop. That’s total bull caca in my opinion. So I’m giving this the “trash” tag.

★★☆☆☆


From Wikipedia.com

Joe Leland, a private detective, begins investigating a case for the recently widowed Norma MacIver. Norma requests that Leland find out everything he can about her deceased husband. Norma requests Leland personally because her husband had mentioned knowing him in the past.

It turns out that Leland and Colin MacIver served in the same military unit during World War II, but at different times. Leland interviews Colin’s first wife, Colin’s mother, and the security guards at the track where Colin supposedly killed himself.

Norma introduces Leland to her neighbor and former therapist, Dr. Wendell Roberts. During their conversation, Wendell reveals that he knew Leland’s wife Karen. It is revealed that Wendell was friends with the man with whom Karen Leland had had an affair.

As Leland’s investigation deepens he uncovers evidence of corruption and murder. Eventually, Leland discovers that Colin was connected to a homicide during Leland’s earlier life with the police department as a detective. During the investigation of Teddy Leikman’s death, a confession was obtained from Felix Tesla, Leikman’s roommate. Tesla was subsequently executed by electric chair. It turned out that Colin MacIver was the true murderer. Joe’s partner, Mike Petrakis, managed to decipher Colin’s coded notes and reveal a paper trail of corruption.