Thursday, April 30, 2026

April '26 Circum et Pervagatus

 


Raw Data:

Novels/Novellas - 13 -

Short Stories - 0 -

Manga/Graphic Novels - 0 -

Comics - 1 -

Average Rating - 3.25 ↓

Pages - 2955 ↑

Words - 1088K ↑


The Bad:

Tower of Terror - 2.5stars of snoozefestapalooza!


14 of My Favorites in Suspense - 2.5stars of wallowing in the gutter


The Good:

Hard Magic - 5Stars of really good urban fantasy







Shadows Linger - 4stars of pretty good re-reading







Movie:

Resident Evil: Extinction, the third in the RE film series, really amps up the tension but falls down pretty hard in most other areas. Decent but my least favorite of the series.




Miscellaneous Posts:


Personal:

Paid our taxes. We have the minimum taken out, so we usually owe some at year's end. I began doing that a long time ago when someone told me that "getting a refund" from the Feds was just giving them an interest free loan with MY money. I've never looked at the "refund" the same again. Took me about an hour, as I had all the paperwork necessary on hand. Just glad it's over with for another year.

Spring is here and we're already in drought conditions. I really don't understand that, what with all the snow we got this past winter, but that's what the weather people say. Considering how early it is for that, I foresee a very uncomfortable summer with lots of ticks.

The bot views are back, with a vengeance. March had kind of tapered off and I was hoping maybe I could use April though the end of the year, but nope, after the first week I kept getting hit. 600-1200 views a day is NOT normal for this blog, especially when I see the same posts getting hit day after day 10 times a day. Makes me wonder what Wordpress is doing, besides absolutely nothing I mean.

My Devilreads experiment is going decent but no better. Not doing reviews has kept me out of reach of the wokescolds and other such finger waggers there. The feed is atrocious though. I can't customize what I actually see so I end up with a lot of garbage as people "update" the percentage of the books they are reading. Overall, the site is not conducive to someone as words oriented as I am or who wants one on one interaction.


Cover Love:

The Tower of the Elephant, a Conan novella by Robert Howard. While not quite accurate, it really does portray the situation very well. And it's just plain cool looking :-)


Tuesday, April 28, 2026

A Son of Thunder (Non-Fiction) 3.5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: A Son of Thunder
Series: -----
Author: Henry Mayer
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Biography
Pages: 504
Words: 178K
Publish: 1986



This was a biography of Patrick Henry and came across much more as someone telling a story than a hard facts and dates kind of biography that I kind of expect when I think of that genre. I like that story telling aspect quite a bit. Made the reading sail along smoothly instead of clumping along through boggy swamps. There is very little about his growing up days and most of it centers around his rise to fame through the American Revolution and then his subsequent hand in crafting the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.

I enjoyed reading this, sparse as it was. Henry was apparently a private man and took that to great lengths. Good for him I say. Also, the reason he was so adamant about the Bill of Rights, everything he feared about a centralized government, has come to pass. He would look on us today as the most abject of slaves, and he was a slave owner himself, so he would know. It’s not that he was prescient, he simply knew, as did most men of his time, how Power worked and how it affected mankind.

From the few interactions with George Washington that he had, I think I’d like to investigate Washington at some time and read a couple of biographies about him. But that’ll have to wait as I’ve got about 15 other non-fiction books in the queue.

★★★✬☆


From the Publisher:

Patrick Henry was a charismatic orator whose devotion to the pursuit of liberty fueled the fire of the American Revolution and laid the groundwork for the United States. As a lawyer and a member of the Virginia House of Burgess, Henry championed the inalienable rights with which all men are born. His philosophy inspired the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, and, most significantly, the Bill of Rights.   Famous for the line “Give me liberty or give me death!” Patrick Henry was a man who stirred souls and whose dedication to individual liberty became the voice for thousands. In A Son of Thunder, Henry Mayer offers “a biography as [Patrick] Henry himself would have wanted it written


Monday, April 27, 2026

Living Artifact - MTG 4E

 

Another disgusting organic looking "thing". I never understood why artists would do that. Eh, whatever.

Life gain is definitely a "green" thing, but it is like a slow drip coffee maker. You only get 1 extra life each turn, which is fine if your opponent is playing a slow deck, but if they are playing a more aggressive deck, you'd want some other cards in your deck to deal with that instead of this. Once again, it would take a very creative mind to find a good use for this card. I probably wouldn't play it anyway, just because it looks gross :-)


Sunday, April 26, 2026

The Dirge of Porky Chunkins

 

Now gather round children
and I'll spin you a tale
the tale of the Dirge of Porky Chunkins
Porky Chunkins was a mighty fine man
A manly man's man
A man who liked what he knew and knew what he liked
and Young Chunkins he did Anime like
with cool Jap words
and cool Jap pix
so much so that a tshirt he did buy
a tshirt to his fandom
Young Chunkins wore it loud
Young Chunkins wore it proud
'cause Anime was cool you know
The Years rolled by
and Young Chunkins wore that shirt
not so proud, not so loud and not so young
The Years rolled by
and Porky Chunkins loved that tshirt still
Til one fateful night
Chunkins' wife did say
Porky, I know thou art a man of God
holy, righteous and sublime
but must thy shirt be so holey too?
Chunkins sighed and bowed his head
he asked for strength to do the deed
This tshirt had served him well
nigh on a score of years
with a heavy heart
but calm of mien
eyes dry
and soul determined
Porky Chunkins did the deed
but in his heart the tshirt lives
and Chunkins sings his song
On cold and desolate nights
when the winds do blow
and clouds the moon do cover
if you listen loud
if you listen proud
You can hear
The Dirge of Porky Chunkins...

This poem has been brought to you by Middle Age Inc.


Friday, April 24, 2026

Hard Magic (Grimnoir Chronicles #1) 5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: Hard Magic
Series: Grimnoir Chronicles #1
Author: Larry Correia
Rating: 5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Urban Fantasy
Pages: 379
Words: 145K
Publish: 2011



Ahhhh, a re-read that lives up to my memories of it.

I read this while still (originally) on Devilreads (where I used my real name and picture, ohhhh the naivete of a misspent social youth!) and a friend there had recommended it to me. His account is still on Devilreads, but he did make the jump to Booklikes and then he’s sputtered out all over the place, so I don’t know if he’s even online any more. That’s how online friendships (come and) go I guess. I loved this book back then, even more so than Correia’s Monster Hunter International series but once I finished the trilogy in 2013, I hesitated for 13 years before taking this plunge and re-reading it.

But I have re-read this and it is just as good if not better than when I read it back in ‘13. Correia gets the vibe just correct for an Alternate History Urban Fantasy. Normally, I’d hate that subslice of genre bastardization, but Correia makes me like it, a lot.

The story is literally punchy, as Jake Sullivan, one of two main characters, is a “heavy”, someone who can manipulate gravity around himself. But he’s smart and he’s figuring stuff out about how to use his powers that no one else has even thought of. I LIKE that in a main character. Don’t make him stupid because you’re a stupid writer. Correia has never gone down that path and I respect him for that. The other main character is Faye, a teen girl who can teleport. She seems to have unlimited power though and it hints at the greater conflict that is coming, a conflict of cosmic horror’esque proportions. I had not read any cosmic horror before this back then, nor did I even know what it was. Given how I’ve gravitated to that genre over the years, I can understand why I was so attracted to this series without quite knowing why. Correia does cosmic horror in his MHI series too, but it’s not quite as in your face as here. But it isn’t the grim, hopeless, void of despair that Cthulhu type cosmic horror is supposed to be, but a more hopeful, humanity can survive if we just try hard enough (think of the optimism from the original Star Trek show). I like that threat of reality being destroyed but it is skillfully balanced by the hope, which I also like.

In my usual reading rotation, I have 6-8 weeks before cycling back to a series. That gives me time to sample a wide variety of other styles so that one series or author doesn’t overwhelm and I get burnt out on them. I’m going to be making an exception for this trilogy. I’ll be reading and reviewing the rest of the trilogy over the next two weeks. Each Friday  I’ll be putting up the next review. Spellbound will go up May 1st and Warbound will go up May 8th. That is very high praise in my estimation.

Also, Wikipedia has NO individual pages for ANY of Correia’s books so there is no indepth synopsis. With how popular Correia is with his fanbase, I cannot fathom why this is the case. I have my suspicions, but no concrete proof, nor do I care enough to try to do one of the books myself just to see it deleted by the damn commies who run wikipedia. There, that rant is out of my system so it shouldn’t show up again in the reviews for the next two books :-D

★★★★★


From Fandom.com

The year is 1930. Opening the story is a chance meeting by a Portuguese cow farmer Active Joe Vierra and a traveling family with a teenage Active named Sally Faye. The farmer realizes she has the same Power as him (Travel) and adopts her. A covert meeting from wealthy blimp business mogul Cornelius Stuyvesant with the Pale Horse, Jonathan Harkness, begins a plot to murder another man through the Power of Plague. As payment for his work, the Pale Horse requests a future favor from Stuyvesant who reluctantly agrees.

Three years later, Jake Sullivan, a former soldier and now ex-convict Active with the Power to manipulate gravity (colloquially called a 'Heavy') is serving off the last of his sentence under the federal government to bring in criminal Actives. Sullivan is a slow-talking, brutish looking man, but is ferociously intelligent and a master at using his seemingly simple Power in clever and creative ways after years of intense practice while in prison at Rockfell. His last job with the feds is to bring in an old friend (and flame) from his criminal days: Delilah Jones, an Active with the 'Brute' ability to imbue her muscles with extraordinary strength. On the run for mass murder, Delilah gives the Feds trouble and is almost captured by Jake when a group of vigilantes appear and assist Delilah's escape on a blimp. Sullivan is left with more questions than the government will answer, and so goes to begin an investigation into Delilah and the group who involved themselves to whisk her away.

The young Sally Faye has grown into her power, able to Travel with ease and beginning to ask Joe questions about the limits of the power and possible ways of using it. Their lives are interrupted when a group of men arrive at the farm looking for something Joe had been tasked to guard years prior. Refusing to give up the item, a firefight erupts. Joe is able to evade the enemy for just long enough to give the device to Sally before being killed by a big man with a terribly scarred face and a white eye called 'Mr Madi'. Telling Sally to flee, Joe gives her instructions to find the Grimnoir.

Turning up a few leads from an old mafia acquaintance unfortunately puts Jake on the radar for the Red Imperium: a foreign Japanese shadow organization that seeks to obtain world dominance. The Red Imperium sends members of the elite Iron Guard to kill Sullivan, but are stopped by the very same party that assisted Delilah: The Grimnoir. Another secret organization, their purpose is to uphold justice and protect the world with their Grimnoir Knights.

Dark forces are at work to gather components of a deadly Tesla device, and it becomes a race to recover the missing pieces before the enemy can put the device back together.



Thursday, April 23, 2026

Chakaal, Again! (Groo the Wanderer #50) 3.5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot, by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Chakaal, Again!
Series: Groo the Wanderer #50
Author: Sergio Aragones
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Comics
Pages: 44
Words: 4K
Publish: 1989



Ahhh, a 50th issue. It’s a big milestone for any comic, especially back in the late 80’s. At the end of issue 49, Groo was in a land where nobody knew him and was trying to force a village to hire him to protect them and came across a female warrior who seemed to know him.

Well, in this double issue we find out all about Chakaal and how Groo “helps” her at every turn with rather usual Groo results, hahahaaha.

Groo had proposed marriage to Chakaal long ago and wouldn’t take no for an answer. So Chakaal sailed to the farthest land she could find and started protecting a village from a bunch of amazons. Chakaal has a Master Plan to discover the amazon’s hidden fortress but Groo obviously messes that up. Then when Chakaal gets captured and Groo goes to “rescue” her, he messes up her Master Plan B, predictable as the sun rising. Finally, when he gives up trying to rescue her, he accidentally blows up the island and reveals its location to the kings navy and they invade and set all the captives free. Chakaal still tells Groo “no” and this time he finally gets it.

Even though this was a double issue, it did not feel any longer than usual. It helped that there was a concurrent side story running about Rufferto (Groo’s mongrel dog) being super jealous of Chakaal. Rufferto isn’t much smarter than Groo and doesn’t realize that Chakaal just won’t have Groo, period. So he’s worried and jealous the whole comic and it is funny :-D


★★★✬☆



Wednesday, April 22, 2026

The Sum of Its Parts (Warhammer 40K: Astra Militarum) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: The Sum of Its Parts
Series: Warhammer 40K: Astra Militarum
Author: Rhuairidh James
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 33
Words: 8K
Publish: 2023



These little snippets of stories from the Warhammer 40K universe are working out for me perfectly. Just enough to keep my appetite whetted without actually filling me up. The perfect appetizer.

That’s what these are and I’m ok with that. Doesn’t make for great reviews but hey, not everything can make that cut, you know?

★★★☆☆


From the Publisher:

Follow the history of one of the Guard’s finest weapons.

THE STORY
Through a series of vignettes, we learn the history of the Leman Russ tank Sebastian's Lance over hundreds of years of Imperial warfare.



Tuesday, April 21, 2026

Way-farer (Kensho #1) 2.5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Way-farer
Series: Kensho #1
Author: Dennis Schmidt
Rating: 2.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: SFF
Pages: 170
Words: 67K
Publish: 1978



This is one of those books I read as a teen, then a 20something, then a 30something now as a 40something. I loved this book, I loved it a lot. This time, not so much. This is a much younger man’s book and it is time for me to acknowledge that fact.

I desperately wanted to give this 5stars, like all my previous times but I’m honest enough with myself to know I can’t. This is a vanity project by the author about Zen Buddhism wrapped inside a science fiction story that is actually a swords and sorcery story.

Ahhhh, another youthful book that I’ve finally outgrown. That’s not a good or bad thing, it just is. While that makes a part of me sad, another part acknowledges that is just how it is, like aching joints and reduced energy levels. Well, if I managed to push off growing up for 48 years, I’d say that was a good run.

Ok cranky old man stage, here I come!!!

★★✬☆☆


From the Publisher

According to every reading it was a paradise planet—a warm and fecund world far more desirable than the teeming, polluted warrens of the planet-city that Earth had become. Yet when the last of the one-way transports had landed its cargo of Pilgrims, the men of Earth were to learn of a danger that no machine could detect, and against which no machine could defend them—the Mushin, mental entities that stimulate and amplify the dark streak of violence that lies near the core of every human being.Seven generations would pass before a descendant of the scattered remnant of the original colonists would be ready to face the power of the Mushin. But first he would have to learn to wield the weapon that is no weapon—and that only where there is no Will, is there a Way…His name is Jerome. This is his story. He is the WAY-FARER.



Monday, April 20, 2026

Lightning Bolt - MTG 4E

 

While Sol Ring might be the face card of Magic the Gathering to me, to the community at large, Lightning Bolt IS the card that embodies every aspect of Magic the Gathering in one distinct picture. Part of that is the card itself. Doing three damage for one red pip is about the best you can hope for. But the image as well just sits in your mind. Everyone has seen lightning at one point or another in their lifetime and they can relate to this image in some way. Some of us love lightning, some of us hate lightning, but none of us simply shrug lightning aside. That is why I think this became the face card of Magic for the general community.

If you disagree with me, well, I play Lightning Bolt and kill your argument, which is only a 2/2 creature, ha! ;-)


Sunday, April 19, 2026

14 of My Favorites in Suspense 2.5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: 14 of My Favorites in Suspense
Series: ----------
Editor: Alfred Hitchcock
Rating: 2.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Crime Fiction
Pages: 181
Words: 71K
Publish: 1959


I’ve noted this on multiple other Alfred Hitchcock Presents collections, but sometimes they just rub me the wrong way. It’s like the writers are almost gleeful in how they are writing about about madness and murder and mayhem. I do not like that. The problem is that I can’t tell if it is actually the authors or just because of a mood that I’m in and not truly aware of.

I didn’t dislike this collection but I was glad to see the end of it. In the table of contents there are little blurbs for each story with spoilers galore. I’m not particularly worried as I doubt a single one of you will read this book, but just in case, do be aware. The other thing that might happen is that I win a big lottery, become super rich and famous and so some lowlife sues me because I spoiled this book for him. So I’m heading that problem off at the pass! (besides the obvious one, you know, of not buying a lottery ticket in the first place) (except on blogger, so total spoilers here)

★★✬☆☆


Blurb & Table of Contents & Synopses:

Sardonic Shockers

Selected by

Alfred Hitchcock. . .

The not so gentle man who knows all the angles (especially the sharp ones) and all the ropes (the hanging kind). From his deep-freeze of ingenious chillers incredible only to the unimaginative and horrifyingly real to the shrewd and daring—the following fourteen tales of intrigue were cunningly chosen to startle as well as satisfy, while above all holding you in the clammy grasp of. . .

SUSPENSE


 "The Birds" by Daphne du Maurier, the source material for the film Hitchcock would do sometime later.

"Man with a Problem" by Donald Honig is a story about a man about to jump off a building and the beat cop trying to talk him down. The twist is that the cop was having an affair with the jumper’s wife and jumper takes them both over the edge at the end.

"They Bite" by Anthony Boucher is a straight up horror story, in which a foreign agent spying on an American desert installation learns of the ancient, bloodthirsty evil dwelling in the old abandoned adobes and dies.

In "The Enemy" by Charlotte Armstrong, a young man tries to help some kids find out who killed their dog and stumbles across a bold murder attempt.

H.G. Wells' "The Inexperience Ghost" starst with some well-bred gentlemen in their exclusive club telling tales to each other.

In "Sentence of Death" by Thomas Walsh, a cop tries to nab a killer with the help of the only reliable witness, and begins developing feelings for her.

"Spring Fever" by Dorthothy Salisbury Davis: a lonely housewife is tempted, then repelled, by a lecherous neighbor pursuing her, ending with violence.

Matthew Gant's "The Crate at Outpost One" has two soldiers guarding an important box with a secret weapon they have to withhold from the enemy. Turns out to be books.

Guy Cullingford's "My Unfair Lady" is about a man worried that he'll be accused of murdering the woman he found dead in the woods. He tries to find the little girl who initially witnessed the crime, only to discover the little girl has an agenda of her own, blackmailing the handsome murderer for free icecream and candy.

In Carter Dickson's "New Murders for Old", a man trying to recover from a nervous breakdown has either been targeted for murder or is losing his mind.

"Terrified" by C.B. Gifford has a man dying slowly after being run off the road, tormented by the young couple who did it. He dies but the cop easily figures it out at the end.

Joan Vatsik's "The Duel" a disturbed woman becomes convinced that a lothario ghost is in love with her, leading to tragic consequences for her husband who dies while she goes insane.

"Four O'Clock" by Price Day is about a man with the power to show the evil in men’s hearts. He decides to make everyone who is evil half the size of a regular man, at 4pm. With himself getting shrunk too as the twist.

Paul Eiden's "Too Many Coincidences" ends the collection. An insurance man ignores his gut feelings about potential danger to his wife because it goes against “the science of math” and she dies. Serves him right for being such a jackass.




Friday, April 17, 2026

[Art] Seasonal Trees

 

Pooja, over at Life's Fine Whine, recently did an Art Therapy post. One of the pictures was this picture of seasonal trees. I'm a huge sucker for Seasonal Anythings, (hence my Maidens of the Year series) so I immediately asked her if I could get a scanned copy for my blog. She was gracious enough to send over a nice version and here we are :-) After the winter we have had, I am SO happy to see pictures of bare ground.

So thank you Pooja. I'm always happy to get new pieces of art for the blog! And the rest of you, have a great day too.


Thursday, April 16, 2026

Debt of Deceit (Empire Rising #17) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: Debt of Deceit
Series: Empire Rising #17
Author: David Holmes
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: SF
Pages: 478
Words: 183K
Publish: 2023



The Void War – 440 pages August 2015

A King’s Ship – 490 pages August 2016

Return to Haven – 495 pages December 2016

The Price of Liberty – 566 pages May 2017

Firestorm – 456 pages April 2018

Siege of Earth – 720 pages June 2019

Mutineer – 530 pages November 2019

Empire’s Doom – 544 pages April 2020

Empire’s Birth – 487 pages August 2020

Imperial Command – 487 pages December 2020

Counterstrike – 525 pages April 2021

Last Stand – 522 pages September 2021

Empire’s Gambit – 746 January 2022

Burden of Command – 557 pages May 2022

Into the Breach – 579 pages September 2022

Shadow Strike – 693 pages February 2023

Debt of Deceit – 718 pages June 2023

Call of Honor – 626 pages October 2023

Battle of the Wilds – 726 pages March 2024

Empire’s End – 609 August 2024

Inheritance of War – 560 pages January 2025

Empire Divided – 696 pages May 2025


*new series

The Voyage Home – 572 pages November 2017

Voyage into Darkness – 531 pages November 2018


That is 24 books in 10 years. That is just under 14,000 pages in 10 years. To put that in perspective, Steven Erikson’s Malazan Book of the Fallen was 10 books long, was approximately 11,000 pages long and took 12 years to complete. The complexity and pure pigheadedness shown by the obvious obfuscation of characters and events in Malazan could only have been done by a human. I am still not convinced that DJ Holmes wrote this Empire Rising series on his own, without the help of AI to do all the heavy pushing.

Whether AI was utilized to write this series or not doesn’t affect my decision to finish it. However, it does influence whether I will continue to read anything else by Holmes (that’ll be a big ol’ “NO” in case you were wondering).

This is not bad writing, but neither has it changed in the 10 years that “DJ Holmes” has been writing it. The characters are exactly the same, just with different damaged parts and being “older”, mainly shown by phsyical things. There is no character growth, which means Holmes hasn’t improved as an author either. This will be the first book I’m giving the tag “AI Written”. I am concerned it will not be the last :-(

★★★☆☆



Wednesday, April 15, 2026

Jane Austen: Jack and Alice 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission


Title: Jane Austen: Jack and Alice
Series: ----------
Author: Jane Austen
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Satire
Pages: 33
Words: 6K
Publish: 1787


Oh, another delightful read. Jack and Alice are brother and sister and Jack is only mentioned because he dies of being so drunk. Alice is wanting the local godbod boy but doesn’t get him.

This was just so over the top. Drunkards, drama, steel traps, insta-healing. Austen really laid it on thick and it just hit my funny bone. This was caricature in the humorous vein, laid on very thick.

My only issue was with being so short, there were a great many people and I did lose track of who was who for several parts. In fact, I had to read this twice to figure out who the “Jack” in the title is because he is such a non-character in the story :-D

What I enjoyed most about this, humor aside, what that I could see the barest flashes of just who Austen was turning into as an author. The eggs were unbroken, sitting on the counter, and I could tell that one day they would turn into lovely and delicious scrambled eggs. There was a pig out in the yard that would one day turn into bacon to go along with those scrambled eggs. Finally, I could see the wheat out in the fields, just about ready for harvest, which would then be turned into bread and then into toast upon which I would heap my eggs and bacon. The pre-ingredients were here and it was fun to spot them.

Finally, that cover. It is a 100% disgrace. It looks like some young adult romance trash instead of the comedic send up that this story is. While I would never read a book based on this cover, if I were the kind of reader who did and I read this, I would cry foul and I would cry it loudly. I might even get up and start some sort of petition! Oh, you all were barely saved from an “online petition”.
*insert eye roll

★★★☆☆


From Coursehero.com

Jane Austen dedicates "Jack and Alice" to Francis William Austen (1774–1865). Francis William Austen was Jane Austen's brother who at the time served as a midshipman on board the H.M.S. Perseverance which was a British Royal Navy warship. The story is divided into nine chapters. The first chapter begins with Mr. Johnson deciding to throw a masquerade party for his 55th birthday. He invites his short list of friends and acquaintances which includes Lady Williams, Mr. Jones and Mrs. Jones, Charles Adams, and Sukey Simpson and her two sisters. Mr. Johnson and his guests all live in a neighborhood called Pammydiddle. The most admired guest at the party is Charles Adams who is "so dazzling a Beauty that none but Eagles could look him in the Face." Everyone at the party is particularly amazed by a male guest who appears to wear a mask that represents the sun. The sunbeams that come from the eyes are so bright that no one can look directly at the mysterious masked man. The man half closes his eyes and is revealed to be Charles Adams who is not wearing a mask at all. He is simply too overwhelmingly attractive that no one is able to look directly at his face. The guests enjoy a night of "elegant & well managed Entertainment" after which they all head home "Dead Drunk."

The people of Pammydiddle continue to talk about the masquerade party for three months afterward. The presence of Charles Adams at the party is the most popular topic of conversation. Almost all the ladies and Alice Johnson in particular desire him. Alice has had a bit too much wine and decides to distract herself from her thoughts of Charles by visiting her friend Lady Williams. Lady Williams has experienced too much misery at the hands of her first love and thus avoids engaging in any more romance. She proceeds to tell Alice a story which abruptly ends after the two women repeatedly disagree over whether a woman can have "too much colour." However, their disagreement is short-lived because Lady Williams views Alice's conduct as a result of the young lady's inebriation and Alice simply has too much respect for Lady Williams to stay angry for long. The two women go for a walk a few days later that leads to Charles Adams's horse pond and notice a young woman "lying apparently in great pain" under a citron tree. The young woman named Lucy shares with Lady Williams and Alice the unfortunate story of how she ended up in her current predicament. Lucy is an extremely accomplished young woman from North Wales. She has lived for the past eight years with her mother's sister who provided her with renowned instructors. Under their instruction Lucy learned "Dancing, Music, Drawing & various Languages." Lucy says that she led a happy life until the last few months. Charles Adams visited his estate in her neighborhood in Wales and Lucy was so enchanted by the handsome young man that she wrote him a letter offering him her hand in marriage. Charles responded with "an angry & peremptory refusal." Lucy says that she assumed that Charles's refusal might be due to his modesty and thus continued to write to him but she received no response. Charles soon left the country so Lucy followed him which is how she ended up in her present situation. Her leg got stuck in a steel trap when she entered Charles's grounds. His servants heard her screams and released her from the trap but not before her leg was completely broken. Alice and Lady Williams are moved to tears and sympathy upon hearing Lucy's story and Lady Williams immediately proceeds to set Lucy's leg "with great skill" despite the fact that she had never performed such an operation. Alice is quite taken with the beautiful and elegant Lucy. Lady Williams informs Lucy to be wary of Alice because Alice drinks too much but insists that Alice is a charming and sweet woman whom she deeply adores.

The narrator of "Jack and Alice" says that at this point she must mention Alice's brother Jack who is "the Hero of this Novel." She says she has had little opportunity to speak of Jack due to his constant state of inebriation which eventually led to his death. The narrator returns then to Alice who is still desperate for a union with Charles and asks her father to go to Charles with a proposal. Charles gives a lengthy response in which he rejects the offer because he is "a perfect beauty." He claims, "I expect nothing more in my wife than my wife will find in me—Perfection." Alice is disappointed at Charles's refusal but soon drinks away her troubles. Meanwhile Lucy is "conquering every heart at Bath" and has forgotten Charles "with tolerable Ease." She writes to Lady Williams about a marriage proposal she has received from an elderly gentleman "of noble fortune." Lady Williams returns her correspondence with a confusing note in which she simultaneously urges Lucy to marry the gentleman and to reject his proposal and come live with her even though she cannot afford it. Lucy never receives her friend's advice because she dies before the letter arrives. Sukey Simpson whom Lucy lives with feels "Envy & Malice" toward Lucy and has poisoned her. Meanwhile in Pammydiddle everyone is surprised to find that Charles Adams intends to marry. They are shocked when Charles marries Lady Williams.



Tuesday, April 14, 2026

Dominion (The Dracula Files #5) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Dominion
Series: The Dracula Files #5
Author: Fred Saberhagen
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 242
Words: 91K
Publish: 1982



The more I read of this “series” the more I am convinced that Saberhagen wrote a whole bunch of standalone fantasy stories and then when he couldn’t sell them because they stunk so bad that no good editor would touch them, reworked them into a Dracula Files series by bookending each story with Dracula and tying it into that mythos. Editors love series, no matter how iffy they might be.

This time around Dracula, going by the name Talisman, is involved in Arthurian Legend and the Sword in the Stone. He has to stop a super bad evil badguy magician from stepping into our current time from the past, where the super bad evil badguy magician was about to be defeated by Arthur, Merlin and his forces.

Dracula only appears near the beginning and the end and plays almost no part. That is reserved for a Merlin who is a drunkard and willfully forgetting the past and some stage magician who is related to the events of the summoning of the super bad evil badguy magician. Stage Magician is just a dupe who we follow to see the events unfolding. I can’t even remember if he survives or not, that’s how much charisma and “presence” he had in the story.

These books are not a “super bad evil badbook magically delicious” way to spend your time, but they aren’t a very good way either. You’d be better served doing your laundry or going to work and earning money to pay off your mortgage. Or even just eating a bowl of Lucky Charms.



★★★☆☆


From the Publisher

A Chicago police detective investigates a series of bizarre murders and becomes involved with vampires, sorcerers and the deadly fight to gain control of a magical sword


Monday, April 13, 2026

Lifetap - MTG 4E

 

Oh noez! An evil vampire leprechaun is hurting da treez! Won't somebody doooooo something?

*announcer voice*

As Adventurer [insert your name], it will be your job to stop Lucky, the Evil Wizard Leprechaun, from stealing all the Lucky Charms from the Tree People. And remember kids, knowing is 713/1425th's of the battle!

This Magic Card brought to you by Hasbro, the money whore of the world.

Sunday, April 12, 2026

Lords and Ladies (Discworld #14) 3.5Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Lords and Ladies
Series: Discworld #14
Author: Terry Pratchett
Rating: 3.5 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 260
Words: 89K
Publish: 1992



My goodness, Pratchett just can’t keep himself from spouting off and preaching at his readers. This could easily have been a 4star read, or higher, as the story is wonderful and I thoroughly enjoyed it. But yeah, I’m not reading a fantasy series to get preached at by some wacko who only gives lip service to such things as logic and theology.

Sigh...

★★★✬☆


From Wikipedia.org

Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, and Magrat Garlick return to Lancre after their recent adventure in Genua. Magrat is stunned when King Verence proclaims their imminent marriage, having already made all the arrangements in her absence. The sudden appearance of crop circles reveals to Nanny and Granny that it is now "circle time", a convergence of parallel universes when the Discworld is susceptible to incursions from the "parasite universe" of the Elves. Elves are capricious and amoral creatures that enter the minds of animals and sentient beings in a more destructive way than witches do, using "glamour" to alter human's perceptions of them. They are normally kept away by a circle of magnetized iron standing stones known as the Dancers. When Nanny and Granny refuse to explain the situation to Magrat, she leaves the coven, disavows witchcraft, and moves into an apartment in Lancre Castle. She soon becomes bored with the courtly lifestyle and unsure of her place.

Mustrum Ridcully, Archchancellor of Unseen University, leads a small group of faculty to attend the wedding. Along the way, they are joined by the Dwarfish lothario Casanunda.

Granny and Nanny discover that a group of local girls, led by Diamanda Tockley and including Agnes Nitt, have formed a new coven whose activities include dancing naked at the Dancers. The two elderly witches try to convince them to stop, with Granny ultimately besting Diamanda in a public witchcraft contest and discrediting the new coven. But a defiant Diamanda later runs through the Dancers into the land of the Elves, where she is knocked unconscious by a poisoned Elven arrow before being rescued by Granny. Nanny subdues an Elf that pursues them back into Lancre, using an iron fireplace poker; Elves and their powers are severely weakened by iron. The witches bring Diamanda and the Elf to Lancre Castle, where Magrat treats Diamanda and Verence agrees to imprison the Elf (though Magrat inadvertently frees it later). Meanwhile, Granny has begun to experience memories of other paths her life has taken in parallel worlds, as well as a growing sense of her own impending death.

Jason Ogg and the other Lancre Morris Men plan a play to be performed for the wedding guests. When they rehearse near the Dancers, the Elves influence them to include Elvish elements in the play. As a result, when the play is performed at the Dancers, it causes sufficient belief—a powerful force on the Discworld—that the Elves are able to make the guests dismantle the stone circle. The Elves arrive, and the Elf Queen plans to legitimize her rule of Lancre by marrying Verence. None of the members of the Lancre coven are present at this time: Magrat has locked herself in her room due to perceived insults in a letter she has discovered, written by Granny to Verence, advising him to plan the wedding; Nanny is being romanced by Casanunda; and Granny has been magically whisked away by Ridcully, who hopes to resume a romantic connection they had when much younger. The women only become aware of what has happened once the Elves begin to wreak havoc in Lancre. Aided only by general dogsbody Shawn Ogg, Magrat fights her way through the infiltrated castle. She discovers a portrait of Queen Ynci, one of the kingdom's legendary founders. Suddenly inspired by the idea of becoming a warrior queen, Magrat finds and dons Ynci's armour. Feeling influenced by Ynci's spirit (and unaware that Ynci is a fiction, the armour constructed from cookware only a few generations previously), she rescues a captured Shawn and sets out for the Dancers. While Granny and Ridcully make their way through the woods, resulting in Granny's capture by the Elves, Nanny and Casanunda travel through a gateway to the abode of the Elf King, who opposes the Elf Queen despite being her spouse.

At the Dancers, Magrat arrives to confront the Elf Queen at the same time as the people of Lancre, rallied by Shawn and Nanny. But the Elf Queen quickly subdues Magrat with glamour. The captive Granny mentally combats the Elf Queen and releases Magrat from the glamour before succumbing to the Elf Queen's attack, her prone body being covered by the bees from her hive, which have swarmed at the Dancers. When the Elf Queen turns her powers on Magrat, attempting to stop her resistance by dismantling her identity, she exposes the unexpectedly valorous core of Magrat's being – something which Granny had deliberately been stoking, aggravating and provoking all along for just this very outcome. Magrat attacks and subdues the Elf Queen just in time for a projection of the Elf King to arrive and send the Elves back to their world.

Granny appears to be dead, but then Nanny and Magrat learn that she has actually borrowed her bees' hive mind, a feat thought impossible. They break open a window in the castle, where Ridcully has reverently laid Granny's body, enabling the bees to get close enough for her to regain consciousness. Nanny points out to Magrat that Granny's letter to Verence has had a great positive impact on Magrat's life, as well as giving her the strength to fight the Elf Queen. Magrat and Verence are married by Ridcully. Later, Granny and Ridcully make peace with their past and their place in the universe. The growing sense of impending death she had been feeling had been due to the impending deaths of some of her parallel-selves.




Saturday, April 11, 2026

Imperatoris Chronicorum II

 

Well, this week then, right?

Sunday started off with Resurrection Sunday, known to the heathens and nominals as Easter. Our church was pretty full and we had a couple of guys in safety vests outside directing people to where they could park. It wasn't quite elbow to elbow room, but for about 9/10ths of the seating, it was. The music team really banged on the drums during the songs and it made me especially glad that I bought some Loop Earplugs. I plan on doing a post in May on the earplugs since by then I'll have a lot more usage out of them. They worked a treat and I didn't feel like my eardrums were being rattled around. Pastor Mike's sermon was on point and I thought he did a great job of preaching to a mixed crowd that included people who had been Christians their whole lives to the people just doing Easter Sunday as their once or twice a year visit. That's a tough line to walk and he did it well. With so many people in attendance, I never know how I'm going to feel afterwards, so we hadn't made any plans.

Thankfully, I was feeling good so we went out for lunch at the one food place open in town(I jest, but thankfully, most places were shut down and I was glad of it). We both got the vegetable omelet and I had the chai latte to drink while Mrs B had a mango smoothie. We went home full but not gluttonized (behold I, Imperator Bookstooge, have created a new word!) The rest of the day was a combination of chores, Munchkins and lazing around while it rained outside. So it was a good day.

Monday was a great way to ease into the work week. Two very easy jobs that we didn't have to rush to finish. It was also sunny! Bonus points for sunshine!

Tuesday morning we woke up to snow covering our cars! Not much, but enough to cover them. And it kept on snowing during the day!! It was ridiculous!!! You can tell because of all the exclamation points I use in this very short paragraph!!!!!

Wednesday, WELL, Wednesday was the king of the week. In preparation for the weekend (When Mrs B is going away to a Ladies Retreat at my old church), I placed an order at Mr Macs. Nothing says being a bachelor for the weekend like an order of Philly Cheese Steak mac and Deluxe Cheeseburger mac :-D Of course, I had to try it out to make sure it wasn't poison. Thank goodness I survived. I was really worried ;-)

Because Wednesday went so well, the balance of the universe had to be restored. Thursday we ended up doing a job in Taxachusetts in a hellhole of a piece of property covered in vines and just crawling with ticks. We were setting missing lot corners and had to set eight 1inch iron pins that were 30inches long. We cut through the vines, trees, whatever, picked the ticks off of us before they imbedded themselves into our flesh and then hammered those blasted pins into the ground until they were flush. Then we repeated that seven more times. I took an ibuprofen at lunch and even with that, my elbow, shoulder and back were killing me by day's end. The only good part of the day was going home and finishing off the philly cheese steak mac and cheese :-D

Friday was sunny and 70F. A bit warm for early April, but I'll take it over snow, any day. My parental pod had flown up to go to the aforementioned Ladies Retreat with Mrs B and so my brother and sister-n-law brought her over and we all met up for dinner at a local restaurant and then she and Mrs B vamoosed. I went home, full of good food, knowing I had even more good food for the rest of the weekend. I watched the sun set through our french door slider and welcomed in the Sabbath. I was out like a light by 9pm.

Today, the plan is to hang out with the inFamous WC Bombfunk (aka my brother). Mrs B made me promise to get out of the house so I don't end up moping the whole weekend. Man, it's like she knows me or something, hahahaha. So he and I are going to do stuff, manly, macho, new england'y things, like wrastle grizzly bears or eat granite chunks or even throw tomahawks at each other, you know, the usual things guys in New England do. If we're feeling particularly cantankerous, we might have a beard growing contest to see who can grow the bushiest beard that afternoon. Of course, being The Imperator, I will win. I win at everything after all.

And that's a wrap for this week with Imperator Bookstooge. 


Imperatoris Chronicorum III

  Here we go, another thrilling post where Imperator Bookstooge wows you with thrills and chills and amazes you with his Indiana Jones ...