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Title:
The List Series: Slough House #2.5 Author:
Mick Herron Rating: 3 of 5 Stars Genre:
Thriller Pages: 44 Words:
17K Publish: 2015
This
was a nice little novella about some lazy guy in MI5 getting played.
We know the stakes aren’t big (no 9/11 circumstances like in the
previous book) but this is a good view into the “games” that go
on. Definitely not a work environment I’d ever want to be in. I’d
end up shooting people when I found out I’d been manipulated and
lied to just because my boss thought it would be fun.
There
was enough separation from the character though that I didn’t get
upset at what was going on. It also helps that most of the main
characters in these Slough House stories ARE screwups in one way or
another and I feel they deserve what they get coming to them. John
Bachelor’s job was to go around and make sure these cold war era
spies were being taken care of, even if they were not living the high
life. And he couldn’t even be bothered to do that, which is why
everything happens in this story. He’s a lazy bum and I didn’t
feel bad at all about him reaping the consequences. I do have to say that
the author does a fantastic job of walking that line of describing
characters in such a way that I don’t want to kill them myself but
I also don’t mind if they fail. That’s a real tightrope and so
far, Herron has walked it without a hitch.
★★★☆☆
From
the Publisher & Bookstooge
Dieter
Hess, an aged spy, is dead, and John Bachelor, his MI5 handler, is in
deep, deep trouble. Death has revealed that deceased had been keeping
a secret second bank account—and there’s only ever one reason a
spy has a secret second bank account. The question of whether he was
a double agent must be resolved, and its answer may undo an entire
career’s worth of spy secrets.
The
List refers to a list of people that Hess had on hand. He was
convincing the German spy agency that the people on this list were
potential material and they were paying him to keep tabs on them.
Only, every person on the list but one was in no condition to even be
talking, much less spying. Bachelor tracks down the one viable
candidate and convinces her to be a spy for England while pretending
to be a spy for the Germans. And at the end of the novella we find
out she was originally working for the Germans the entire time. So
Bachelor is now paying a German spy and hired her into the English
Intelligence Agency.
This review is written with
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without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at
WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission
Title: Conan and the Mists of Doom Series:
Conan the Barbarian #34 Author: Roland
Green Rating: 1.5 of 5 Stars Genre:
Fantasy Pages: 184 Words:
71K Publish: 1995
This was one of the worst Conan stories
I’ve read so far, and I’ve read some real stinkers. It was an
accumulated weight of misery that built up over time and I just
couldn’t take it any more. When I finished this book, I swore off
of these pastiches. Not necessarily for good, but at least until I go
and read ALL the original Conan stuff by Howard.
This was a garbage story and the
writing was that of a hack. It felt very much like Green had written
his own “adventure” story and when it wouldn’t sell (because it
was so boring and dumb and stupid), repurposed it into a Conan story.
This wasn’t just “not good”, but it was “bad”. I shouldn’t
feel like I’m reading some highschooler’s “story” when I’m
reading a Conan novel. I need the skill and talent in the writing
that makes me feel that sizzle, that zing as the sword chops through
the monster. Just describing the action isn’t writing the action
and I’m afraid this writer doesn’t have the skill to do that.
Blehhhhhh...
★✬☆☆☆
From Wikipedia
The story is
set in the Kezankian Mountains and the borderlands of Turan. After
Conan's time spent with the Afghulis begins to sour, he leads a band
of tribesmen away from the Afghuli mountains and towards Koth. During
their journey, the tribesmen are intercepted by a force of Turanian
cavalry, led by Khezal, an old acquaintance of Conan's.[2] Khezal
offers Conan and his warriors freedom if they help combat the Mist of
Doom, a life-draining force that is attacking Khezal's territory near
the mountains. Unbeknownst to ether Conan or Khezal, the Mist is
controlled by the Lady of the Mists, who is gathering captives to
feed to the Mist, in hopes of controlling it.
The Afghulis and Turanians meet up with
a third group of desert nomads, the Ekinari, led by Bethina, an
attractive young warrior woman. The three groups combine forces in an
effort to defeat the Mist before it grows out of control. In the
climactic battle, the Lady of the Mist is killed, but not before she
can summon an elemental. The two magical forces collide, destroying
the valley and each other. Conan's chief advisor, Farad, and Bethina
stay in the valley to repopulate it while Conan rides on into Koth.
Red was always about doing damage, even if it meant doing damage to yourself in the process. So any card that was "life gain" (ie, it gave you life) was a big deal. With this being an artifact, it meant that a red deck could run it without any hiccups. When a game comes down to a single lifepoint, having a card like this can keep you from being pushed over the cliff of defeat.
And as we all know, winning is everything. Forget about having fun or hanging out with your friends. You WIN or you lose, that is all there is ;-)
In 1914, aliens known as Mondoshawans meet their contact on Earth, a priest of a secret order, at an ancient Egyptian temple. They take the only weapon capable of defeating a great evil that appears every 5000 years, promising to protect it and return it before the great evil's re-emergence. The weapon consists of the four classical elements, as four engraved stones, plus a sarcophagus containing a "fifth element".
In the 23rd century,[b] the great evil appears in deep space as a giant living fireball. It destroys an armed Earth spaceship as it heads to Earth. The Mondoshawans' current human contact on Earth, priest Vito Cornelius, informs the president of the Federated Territories of the great evil's history and the weapon that can stop it.
On their way to Earth, a Mondoshawan spacecraft carrying the weapon is ambushed and destroyed by a crew of Mangalores, alien mercenaries hired by Earth industrialist Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg, who is working for the great evil. A severed hand in metal armor from the wreckage of the spacecraft is brought to New York City. From this, the government uses biotechnology to recreate the original occupant of the sarcophagus, a humanoid woman named Leeloo, who remembers her previous life. Alarmed by the unfamiliar surroundings and high security, she escapes and jumps off a ledge, crashing into the flying taxicab of Korben Dallas, a former major in Earth's special forces.
Dallas delivers Leeloo to Cornelius and his apprentice, David, who recognizes her as the fifth element. As Leeloo recuperates, she tells Cornelius that the stones were not on board the Mondoshawan ship. Simultaneously, the Mondoshawans inform Earth's government that the stones were entrusted to an alien opera singer, the diva Plavalaguna. Zorg reneges on his deal with the Mangalores for failing to obtain the stones, and kills some of them. Earth's military sends Dallas to meet Plavalaguna; a rigged radio contest provides a cover, awarding Dallas a luxury vacation aboard a flying hotel on planet Fhloston, accompanied by flamboyant talk-show host Ruby Rhod. It includes a concert by Plavalaguna, and learning that Leeloo shares his mission, Dallas lets her accompany him. Cornelius instructs David to prepare the temple, then stows away on the luxury spaceship. The Mangalore crew, pursuing the stones for themselves, also illegally board the ship.
During the concert, the Mangalores attack, and Plavalaguna is killed. Dallas extracts the stones from her body and kills the Mangalore leader, causing the others to surrender. Zorg arrives, shoots Leeloo, and activates a time bomb. He flees with a carrying case he presumes contains the stones, but returns when he discovers it is empty. As Zorg's bomb causes the hotel's evacuation, Dallas finds Leeloo traumatized and escapes with her, Cornelius, Rhod, and the stones in Zorg's private spaceship. Zorg deactivates his bomb, but a dying Mangalore sets off his own, destroying the hotel and killing Zorg.
As the great evil approaches Earth, the four meet David at the temple. They deploy the stones, but Leeloo, having learned of humanity's history of cruelty, has given up on life. Dallas declares his love for her and kisses her. Leeloo combines the power of the stones, emitting divine light onto the great evil and defeating it. Dallas and Leeloo are hailed as heroes, and as dignitaries wait to greet them, the two passionately embrace in a recovery chamber.
This is one of the movies that I have watched over and over again. I hadn't seen it before a coworker recommended it in the mid-2000's to me and when I saw the cover to the dvd and it had a blond Bruce Willis on it. I was hooked.
I hesitate to call this a hokey movie, but it is really bordering on that. I don't mind, but others might not be able to get past that veneer and enjoy this. From the get-go with the aliens and the archeologist and the priest, there was something that was just a bit off about this. I've come to realize that it is this movie not taking itself seriously at all.
I recently bought this in blu ray, hence the cover above and was hoping for some commentary tracks. Sadly, the extras on the blu ray were pretty sparse and limited to showing some interviews with the various actors and giving a little bit of the history of how the movie was made. But no directors commentary or actors commentary. I guess it isn't a big enough hit to pay for that kind of thing. That's too bad, because I think it would have been fascinating to get some thoughts on what was going on.
Chris Tucker plays a side kick and man, the first time I saw this I hated his character. He was a pompadour sporting effeminate macho man who did a girly high scream a lot. It was a bunch of diametrically opposed ideas all coming together into one character. Tucker manages to pull it off too, which is incredible.
Willis is his usual special space forces tough guy. He did an admirable job of it too. Sadly, playing across from Jovovich, well, the chemistry wasn't there. She's supposed to be this super warrior yet lovely and vulnerable woman and while he says all the correct words, the chemistry just wasn't there. Jovovich does a great job too. She speaks a whole new language, kicks butt and falls in love with Willis and because of the power of love, saves the universe from The Bad Thing. She was fantastic as the warrior, and it was a precursor to show what she was capable of in just a few years when she dominated with the Resident Evil movies. But as a "perfect woman", well, I just wasn't feeling it. I wish they had chosen someone else. Considering that the director, Luc Besson, started an affair with Jovovich during the film, well....
The Bad Thing is the destruction of the Universe but it really doesn't play much of a part. It plays just enough to kick our characters along, but never felt like a direct threat. THAT villainous part was played by Gary Oldman, as Zorg, some sort of ultra-rich guy who sold out to The Bad Thing. He's the face of villainy in this movie and my goodness, I loved every second of his over the top silliness. It's hard to take him seriously and then bam, he pushes a button and tons of people just die and I'm like "oh yeah, he's the bad guy". He gets his just desserts and it is glorious :-D
Now that I own this on disc I feel like I'll not watch it again for who knows how long. That seems to happen to me. Once I own something, I lose desire to view it. But if I DO feel like watching it, now I can without having to jump through hoops of finding it on a streaming service :-/
While I thoroughly enjoy this movie, I don't know if I actually recommend it. If you're a big Bruce Willis or Milla Jovovitch fan or a fan of the slightly hokey, then I would recommend it to you. Otherwise, I'm ambivalent.
This
review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained
therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to
copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions.
Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted
Permission
I
enjoyed this anti-hero badguy makes good, well, not so bad anyway.
Nothing particularly stood out good or bad, which is why it is
getting that middle of the road rating of 3stars. It’s good enough
that I plan on reading the rest of the trilogy.
But
unless those two books improve my opinion dramatically, I do not plan
on seeking out any other work by the author. I probably shouldn’t
base any future plans on this book alone. But really, outside of the
main character being big and beating up even worse people than
himself, there’s not much else to discuss. So my brain goes down
these weird little paths, and since I’m an inveterate planner, it
usually goes down a planning path. Even if there isn’t enough data
to do any actual planning on. Therefore, my NEW plan is to finish
this trilogy and reserve judgment.
Hahhaahahahahahahaa,
riiiiiight, ME, reserving judgment. My goodness, sometimes I just
crack myself up.
★★★☆☆
From
the Publisher and Bookstooge
Isaiah
Coleridge is a mob enforcer in Alaska--he's tough, seen a lot, and
dished out more. But when he forcibly ends the moneymaking scheme of
a made man, he gets in the kind of trouble that can lead to a bullet
behind the ear. Saved by the grace of his boss and exiled to upstate
New York, Isaiah begins a new life, a quiet life without gunshots or
explosions. Except a teenage girl disappears, and Isaiah isn't one to
let that slip by. And delving into the underworld to track this
missing girl will get him exactly the kind of notice he was warned to
avoid.
After
beating up lots of people and threatening lots of people and getting
almost killed by crooked cops, Isaiah founds her corpse. Her horse
had thrown her in the woods and she’d died from hitting her head.
No big mystery at all. Isaiah just wasted all that time and energy
for nothing. So much for laying low.
Now, before we begin, we have to set the scene and the mood. So imagine your life is going along quite normally, as it always does. You have pizza on Tuesday, maybe a kale shake on Friday. Then, the invasion begins. Everywhere you go, everywhere you look, everywhere you sniff, there is Pumpkin Spice! Including biscuits, sigh. Mrs B wanted to try these, so she bought them. They are basically cinnamon rolls that you drizzle pumpkin spice "frosting" on after they are cooked.
Now they did taste good, but still, Grands biscuits are supposed to be BISCUITS. So now we are in the proper frame of mind, let us continue the journey of a small town, celebrating harmlessly, or so they think!
First, and always most importantly, is the food. Without the food, the Pumpkin Festival is just a bunch of people walking around looking at stuff. But WITH food, well, that completely changes everything, now doesn't it? Food is like the Force.
“... my ally is the Food, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Hungry beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Food around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere...” ~ Master Chef Yoda
Our first stop is always food alley. We get there around 4:30pm, before things kick off at 5pm. The food trucks are all open but not many people have arrived yet so there are no lines. I got a pepperoni calzone and Mrs B got some sort of breakfast sandwich with avocado. Then because I knew that a calzone wasn't very healthy, I decided to eat my vegetables and have a slice of pumpkin roll. Ahhh, that's the stuff.
Then it was time to visit the Venerable Town Hall. This majestic and gracious building towers over all its denizens, assuring them that the reins of government are in capable hands. Capable enough to run a Pumpkin Festival anyway. But that is all "I" will vouch for.
Next comes the annual perambulation around the Oval. There are many vendors and lots of people and you just never know WHAT you might see. Jack Skellington welcoming one and all. An anorexic cop! And to top things off, a pig on a leash. I kid you not. How can you not love small towns where you can see a pig on a leash in the town oval? *clap *clap *clap
As you make your way around the Oval, not only are there "things" to see, but artwork on windows galore. Motorcycles seem to be a big theme this year. These were done on storefront windows, to give you some size comparison.
Finally, as the sun sets and the dark chill night sets in, when the lights go out and you wonder, "will I die in the next 5 seconds from a homicidal maniac slicing my head off with a razor blade?", THAT is when our Citizen of the Year appears, bringing light and hope to all who see them. They climb the firetruck to the top of the Venerable Town Hall and ceremonially light the giant pumpkin inside, and thus our small town is safe for another year from the hordes of massholes who try to invade us every chance they get.
This event has become a habit for Mrs B and I. We go, we eat, we look and buy, we laugh and we scream and holler to encourage the Citizen of the Year. Then we go home and go to bed, because we're older and tireder than the previous year :-D
This
review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained
therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to
copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions.
Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted
Permission
Title:
Lavondyss / DNF Series: Mythago Wood
#2 Author: Robert Holdstock Rating: 2
of 5 Stars Genre: Fantasy Pages:
200/325 Words: 84K/137K Publish: 1988
I
wasn’t particularly enjoying this read but wasn’t really hating
it either, so I guess I was coasting along, being lazy.
Then
one of the characters says to another something along the lines of
“Now you’re just talking nonsense” and it suddenly hit me, this
entire book is nonsense and the WHOLE idea by Holdstock is nonsense
and so I just stopped reading without further ado.
I
was wasting my time on utter nonsense and when I realized that, I
stopped. Not as good as not starting the nonsense in the first place,
but much better than continuing it to the end and allowing it to
infest my mind, even if negatively. I’m also giving this book the
“garbage” tag because it’s not fun nonsense :-(
The
cover is awesome however. I would have picked this book up based on
it alone. It’s a real shame such garbage is hiding inside.
★★☆☆☆
From
Wikipedia
During
her formative years, Tallis encounters the British composer Ralph
Vaughan Williams (not a mythago, but real flesh and blood).
Tallis sings him a song that she thinks she has made up herself, but
the composer identifies its tune as that of a folk
song he has collected personally in Norfolk.
Slowly Tallis's links with the wood intensify. She makes
ten chthonic wooden
masks, each of which represents one of the ten first legends in
Ryhope wood. Within the context of the story, these masks
are talismans that
help to engage certain parts of her subconscious and so link her with
the characters and landscapes which are forming within the wood. When
properly used (especially later in the book), these masks allow
Tallis to see things that cannot be seen without them, and they can
also be used to create 'Hollowings' — pathways in space and time
which allow her to step into far-off places within the wood which
would otherwise take days, weeks, or even months to travel to on
foot. Tallis makes the masks in the following order:
The
Hollower — made from elm, this female mask is painted red and
white.
Gaberlungi
— made from oak and painted white, this mask is known as "memory
of the land".
Skogen
— made from hazel and painted green, this mask is known as "shadow
of the forest".
Lament
— made from willow bark, this simple mask is painted gray.
Falkenna
— the first of three journey masks is painted like a hawk; this
mask is known as "the flight of a bird into an unknown region".
Silvering
— the second of three journey masks is painted in colored circles;
this mask is known as "the movement of a salmon into the rivers
of an unknown region". The Silvering is also the name
of a short story included in Merlin's
Wood.
Cunhaval
— the third of three journey masks is made from elder wood; this
mask is known as "the running of a hunting dog through the
forest tracks of an unknown region".
Moondream
— made from beechwood, this mask is painted with moon symbols on
its face. This mask plays a prominent role in The
Hollowing.
Sinisalo
— made from wych elm and painted white and azure, this mask is
known as "seeing the child in the land".
Morndun
— this mask appears dead from the front, but alive from behind and
is known as "the first journey of a ghost into an unknown
region".
Before
setting foot in the wood, Tallis has one particular encounter that
has major repercussions through the rest of the story: with the
'help' of one of the mythagos, she 'hollows' (creates a Hollowing)
and observes Scathach, a young warrior, dying on a battlefield
beneath a tree. Tallis' misdirected magic used to help this young
warrior changes both her story and Harry Keeton's story in Ryhope
wood.
Deep
within Ryhope wood Tallis eventually meets up with Edward Wynne-Jones
(human, not mythago) who was only mentioned in Mythago Wood. He
is now living in the wood as a shaman to
a small village of ancient people. Through his understanding of the
wood (which he studied with the scientist George Huxley from the
first book), Tallis herself gains an understanding of her connections
with all that surrounds her; most importantly, she asks him how she
might find her lost brother Harry Keeton
