Tuesday, February 10, 2026

The Scarlet Citadel (Conan Chronicles #2) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: The Scarlet Citadel
Series: Conan Chronicles #2
Author: Robert Howard
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 44
Words: 16K
Publish: 1933


This takes place after The Sword and the Phoenix, as a character and the attempted coup, are mentioned as having happened in the past. Conan gets betrayed but with some help, comes back stronger than ever.

This is one story where wizardry is both hurtful and helpful. But through it all, Conan doesn’t like it nor does he trust the wizard helping him, as it is obvious the wizard is simply using Conan to get his own revenge on the “bad” wizard. But it is stories like this that set the stage for the idea of Conan fighting any and all wizardry.

It is also quite interesting to see Conan near the apogee of his career. He’s king of a country, but has no offspring (I don’t know if any ever exist in the official Conan timeline or not. He does have kids in some of the pastiches I read) and is as strong but alone as ever. He’s at the top, but now he has to deal with holding onto it instead of just trying to take it like he did earlier in life. He even considers giving up here and starting over, but then his famous temper comes to the fore and he decides no one, especially a wizard, is going to push him around.

There is also a good bit of monster’y stuff. There’s a giant snake and in relation to that several mentions of his time as a river pirate Amra. Conan has to go through an underground tunnel system and encounters several denizens of hell, so the idea of cosmic horror and evil from the great darkness were inherent in Conan’s mythos right from the get-go. There’s no question of that in my mind now. Conan doesn’t just fight usurpers or tigers and animals, but he’s in a world of monsters and he’ll fight them as soon as spit at them.

Reading these original “Chronicles” is giving me a much better grasp on Conan as a character, even though I’ve only read just over 50 pages. Howard imbues Conan with characteristics that have survived to this day, both characteristics of personality and situation. While these stories aren’t ones that I would consider “great”, they are solidly good and I am glad I am taking my time to read them. Not even a shadow of the dreaded “I wasted my time” :-D

★★★☆☆


From Conan.fandom.com

Conan's army is destroyed on the plains of Shamu, having answered a plea for help from his ally Amalrus of Ophir. Amalrus has treacherously joined forces with Strabonus of Koth and the wizard Tsotha-lanti, in an attempt to overwhelm Conan's army and capture him. While Strabonus wants the king dead, Tsotha wants him alive. With a touch of poison, he paralyze Conan and has him bound in chains. While Strabonus orders his general, Arbanus, to invade Aquilonia through Shamar, both he and the wizard bring Conan to Khorshemish, capital of Koth.

Conan stands before Strabonus and Amalrus, while they dictate terms - they want him to turn over control of Aquilonia to Prince Arpello of Pellia. Conan scoffs at the kings and insults them, spitting in Amalrus' eye. The enraged king moves closer to kill Conan for his defiance, but Tsotha blinds him, reminding the king who the real power is as Strabonus pretends he doesn't notice. Tsotha sends Conan to the dungeon, guarded by his eunuch servant, Shukeli, and leaves him in complete darkness before going to assist the siege at Shamar.

Conan tests his restraints and finds them too strong to break. The stories he has heard of Tsotha's dungeons and inhuman experiments actually strikes fear in the barbarian's heart. His fear is amplified when he hears a rustling sound and, in the shadows, sees a tremendous snake, over 80 feet long, slither into the chamber. Conan stands motionless as venom drips from the snake's fangs and burns his thigh. Suddenly, the sound of a door opening from inside the prison chamber forces the snake to flee. A gigantic naked black man, who calls Conan by his pirate name Amra, has come with the keys and asks what he would pay for them. This is merely a ruse, however, as the man wants Conan dead for killing his brother during his travels with BĂȘlit. Fortunately, just as he's about to deal a killing blow towards Conan, the snake rears up behind him and constricts the man in its coils, causing the keys, along with a sword, to fall onto the floor at Conan's feet. He manages to grasp the keys with his feet and free himself, only to find the door barred from the outside. Shukeli appears outside the barred window and shrieks with laughter. However, in a flash, Conan stabs through the bars with his sword and instantly skewers Shukeli in the stomach. Because the barred door can only be opened from the outside, Conan is still trapped and realizes he must go down the same corridor where the snake came in from. Conan creeps down the corridor, ignoring the passages on either side, until he hears a sobbing sound and diverts himself towards an adjacent tunnel. However, he is horrified upon discovering the source of this weeping - a tentacled, amorphous blob-like creature who, when it sees Conan, becomes overjoyed with laughter and starts chasing him. He quickly outpaces it, but trips and drops his torch, thrusting himself into darkness as he scrambles up before continuing his escape. He creeps along the nearest passage and stops before a large pit in the ground. Obviously, he has gone in the wrong direction. However, before he can decide on what to do, Conan senses something unseen rising from the pit and turns back the way he came. He comes across the final embers of his torch, manages to get it fully lit again, and hurries his way back towards the central corridor, again feeling the invisible presence engulfing him. He flees in sheer horror, while hearing the sounds of different monsters and beasts down each tunnel. As Conan is wondering why these beasts won't come out into the central opening, he realizes the giant serpent is already slithering behind him. It seems as though even the monsters are afraid of this serpent. He hurries down a side passage and, through the window of a prison door, witnesses a monstrous plant torture an unconscious captive entwined within its grasp. Conan enters the cell and slices away the plant's stem, as it hisses while waving its tentacles and blossoms at him. Soon, the plant dies upon having its stem chopped away and the man is freed. The man, Pelias, tells Conan how his rival, Tsotha-lanti, has held him captive for almost a decade. His powers are beginning to return and he leads Conan back to the entrance. The snake, identified by Pelias as Satha, emerges and moves in to attack. However, once it sees Pelias, its eyes widen in terror and it flees. When they reach the barred door, Pelias re-animates Shukeli's corpse and has him unlock the door. The two go to Tsotha's private chambers, where Pelias uses the wizard's crystal ball to show Strabonus' army laying siege to Shamar and chaos engulfing Tarantia, as, with word spreading of Conan's alleged death, Prince Arpello of Pellia has moved to take over the kingdom. Conan laments that the capital is almost a week away by fastest steed, and Strabonus's army lie along the path, but Pelias summons a batlike creature to fly him directly towards Tarantia.

In Tarantia, Trocero desperately tried to keep the peace as rioters and looters, mystically encouraged by Tsotha-lanti to believing Conan is dead, rampage through the streets. Prince Arpello made his play for the crown and managed to get the council to surrender, when he won the support of the public. Trocero abandons the city with 1500 soldiers upon realizing he would have to fight the citizens themselves. The chancellor, Publius, had been imprisoned and heavy taxes laid on the merchants of the city, with anyone protesting hanged. Soon, armed men from the Pellian army quickly and violently clamp down on any acts of disloyalty within the city. When word spread that the Kothian army had taken Shamar, the people turned to Arpello for reassurance, but he simply drank some wine and laughed at them. When a small insurgency headed by the student Athemides is quelled, the young man is smuggled out of the city to the camp of Trocero to plead with him to return. It's then, with Arpello loudly proclaiming from the ramparts that he is now king, Conan arrives on the wings of the demon. A shocked Arpello charges Conan, but the true king picks up the Prince and throws him off the castle walls.

The siege of Shamar continues, and although the city is hopelessly outnumbered, its strong walls have prevented it from being entirely overrun. Strabonus grows anxious, as he would like to continue into Aquilonia but doesn't want to leave his flank unprotected. Suddenly, a bugle is heard and a galloping army rides from within the country. When Tsotha sees it is Conan leading the charge he realizes Pelias must have helped, Strabonus frantically sends his men to the attack, but the outnumbered Aquilonians burst through the ranks and Amalrus is trampled to death under the charge. Conan ends up face to face with Strabonus. Strabonus takes one desperate swing at Conan, but is run through immediately. The Kothian army is routed and slaughtered as Conan turns his attention to Tsotha. Although Tsotha hurls magic at Conan, the king lops off the wizard's head, though it still lives and glares at Conan...until a giant eagle swoops down the pick up the head and fly away. The body of Tsotha rises and runs off in the direction of the eagle, who laughs with the voice of Pelias and Conan, though grateful for Pelias's help, hopes never to see him again.



Monday, February 09, 2026

Kismet - MTG 4E

 

I remember this card, mainly because of the tiger. I don't think I used this card because making your opponent's "everything" come into play tapped means they can't use it the turn it comes into play, which slows the game down AND makes your opponent feel like they can't play. Maybe from a competitive side it makes sense, but when you're playing with your friends, there's no sense in alienating them or making the game feel "unfun". Getting back to the tiger. I don't know why I remember it, because it isn't like it is a creature or anything. But somehow, that image stuck in my head and even now, I can shake my head and remember the card :-D


Sunday, February 08, 2026

Thorn (The Dracula Files #4) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Thorn
Series: The Dracula Files #4
Author: Fred Saberhagen
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Fantasy
Pages: 254
Words: 97K
Publish: 1980



This dual storyline is about Dracula before he became Dracula and about him today. It is a loose sequel to Friend of the Family in that a character or two from Friend are tangentially involved, but that is as far as that goes. Basically the early storyline is him chasing down a princess gone wild named Helen and how he marries her and finds a painting done of her by Da Vinci. The second, modern, storyline is about him chasing down the painting and finding out Helen has gone nosferatu (second tier vampire I guess?) and when she dies, he goes crazy and kills people. There’s other stuff going on, but it is just adding flesh to the story and not changing it in any significant way.

If I had been more cognizant of the overall storyline, I might have picked up on the fact that the Helen in the modern story was the Helen from the past. But even with the reveal, there is nothing said about HOW she became what she was. It really felt deus ex machina, so I don’t feel bad about not picking up on it earlier. It also didn’t really add anything to the story except to link the history part with the modern part. Since the history part was half the book, I did expect a stronger link.

Oh well, that is why these Dracula Files books are only getting 3stars. They’re decent reads but nothing great or something I ever plan on re-reading. And we all know how much I like to re-read the Good Books :-D

★★★☆☆


From Fandom.com

Jonathan Thorn, a vampire, tries to recover an unknown painting by Leonardo da Vinci from Ellison Seabright, who is suspected of murdering his half brother to acquire the priceless work

A Love Affair for the Ages. Five hundred years ago their paths first crossed. He possessed her totally, not quite against her will. Until she fled. And was captured. And was punished. And fled. And is fleeing still…

Dracula tells the story of his life and his great love before he became undead. The portrait of his beloved from those precious living days is in the hands of villains. The Prince must pursue and possess this link with his breathing life. The Southerlands, particularly Judy, are ready to assist an old friend of the family.


Friday, February 06, 2026

My Week XXXI with Pictures

 

Sunday saw the dramatic return of Imperator Bookstooge as he swept back into the blogosphere. Spheres of influence were shaken and the status quo destroyed as he vowed to take over Devilreads and make it safe for everyone, not just illiterate dumb dumbs who wouldn't know a good book if it hit them over the head. The Imperator knows he has a long struggle ahead of him and that defeat is most likely, but this has not deterred our intrepid hero. All Hail Imperator Bookstooge!

Monday was one of those days I got home from work and all plans evaporated because of how tired I was. I had visions of doing laundry, vacuuming, sweeping, mopping, etc. 2 weeks ago we got hit by a snow storm that dumped over a foot of snow on us and it is sticking around. I'm trudging around each day through snow that has piled up to my knees in places. I come home exhausted.

Tuesday I was by myself as Short Round went with his wife to an ultrasound to see their newly conceived baby. It was a nice day (above freezing) and while the job sucked (to be fair, all jobs suck this time of year with this much snow), I still had energy at the end of the day. I did laundry. Go me!!!!! I also listened to a lot of Enya's albums as I needed something very easy and soothing to help me settle down from doing all those laundries ;-)

Wednesday was the day I overcame and did even MOOOOR chores. I hadn't vacuumed our place in over a month (don't judge me) and it was time. I broke out ye olde Rainbow Vac and got a ton of stuff off our floors and out of the carpets. Every time I vacuum, I tell myself I need to do it weekly (I do!) but then a month passes and this situation happens, time after time after time. I guess I just don't like vacuuming. But in my defense, Mrs B likes doing vacuuming even less than I do, so you can consider me the clean freak of the pair ;-) Whilst I was vacuuming, I shanghaied Mrs B into sweeping and mopping. I might be the clean freak, but the freaky deaky has to be shared.

Thursday, well Thursday turned into a good day. It was sunny, it was at the freezing mark (amazing how warm freezing feels when you been below it for weeks) AND I got some Mr Macs Deluxe Cheeseburger mac-n-cheese for lunch. Considering it was between 800 to 1000 calories you know it was good. Mrs B had a good day too, so that made for a good evening together as we enjoyed the general goodness of the day.

Friday wasn't as fun as Thursday.  The job wasn't easy and by the time we were done I was hurting. I was setting pins on a property line and the ground was frozen, so I had to use a power drill and then whale on the pin itself to drive it flush. THEN I had to put a wooden tall stake next to it as a witness. Oh, did I mention I had to shovel out a foot of snow at each point, enough so I could kneel down and do all that work? Yeah, it was brutal. Ended up taking 2 extra strength tylenol for my shoulder and elbow when I got home.


Saturday I have plans.  I'm part of our church's men's group that meets twice a month from 8-9:15am. We're currently studying 2nd Peter. On a good Saturday we'll get through 5 verses :-D  Then my brother is coming over and we'll shoot the breeze or maybe play some Munchkin.  Finally, at 2pm I'm heading out to play some Magic with one of the teens from church. We're going to try some of the "new" Precon Commander decks I have from '21 or '22. I am really looking forward to playing some Magic!

And that's a wrap for the week!


Thursday, February 05, 2026

Puzzles of the Black Widowers (The Black Widowers #5) 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Puzzles of the Black Widowers
Series: The Black Widowers #5
Authors: Isaac Asimov
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Mystery
Pages: 144
Words: 68K
Publish: 1990


I felt that I was being generous with giving this 3stars. Most of the stories felt like Henry (the waiter and the guy who always solves the mystery) just pulled a random solution out of a hat. Nothing that he stated was categorically fact like in previous collections. I don’t mind admitting that it might have been me, but I don’t think so. I think Asimov was reaching the end of his rope and it was showing. While the stories were written from 1985 to 1990, the collection wasn’t published until 1990 and Asimov died in ‘92.

There is one more post-humus collection of the Black Widowers. Most of the stories are reprints, but I believe there are a couple of new ones in it. I plan on focusing on those. The fact that I’m spending as much time talking about the next book as I did about this one should tell you how milque-toast this particular collection was.

★★★☆☆


From Wikipedia.org

Introduction

"The Fourth Homonym" (1985)

"Unique Is Where You Find It" (1985)

"The Lucky Piece" (1990)

"Triple Devil" (1985)

"Sunset on the Water" (1986)

"Where Is He?" (1986)

"The Old Purse" (1987)

"The Quiet Place" (1988)

"The Four-Leaf Clover" (1990)

"The Envelope" (1989)

"The Alibi" (1989)

"The Recipe" (1990)



Tuesday, February 03, 2026

Jane Austen: Frederic and Elfrida 3Stars

 

This review is written with a GPL 4.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at WordPress & Blogspot by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission

Title: Jane Austen: Frederic and Elfrida
Series: ----------
Author: Jane Austen
Rating: 3 of 5 Stars
Genre: Satire
Pages: 9
Words: 2K
Publish: 1787


Brona has graciously agreed to continue to host the #ReadingAusten into 2026 as some of us (ie, me) had more Austen to read. The link to her master post with all the various posts by Austen readers can be found at the end after my avatar. So thank you Brona, I appreciate your thoughtfulness.

For whatever reason, unlike some of the previous Juvenilia works where I felt that they never should have been released and was almost embarrassed to read them, Frederic & Elfrida was simply hilarious and a wonderful short story parody. I chortled my way through all 9 pages and laughed my head off at the end where Elfrida gets Frederic to finally marry her by having fainting spells.

It is little stories like this that keep me reading this Juvenilia stuff. I feel like I am a better man for reading the cast off writings of a 12 year old girl from almost 250 years ago. Ain’t life grand!? :-D

★★★☆☆


Synopsis

Elfrida and Frederic are cousins who were born on the same day, grew up together, and were very much alike.  It is not surprising that their parents determine they should be married.  Austen skips around to introduce Elfrida’s friend, Charlotte, who is visiting her aunt when she receives a letter from Elfrida requesting that she purchase Elfrida a bonnet.  Charlotte is a very amiable young woman, so of course, she obliges.

When Charlotte returns home and is welcomed back “with the greatest Joy” by Elfrida and Frederic, they take a walk and spy two girls, Jezalinda and Rebecca, the daughters of Mrs. Fitzroy, and a friendship develops.

After the meeting with the Fitzroys, the last few pages breeze by, with a relationship frowned upon then embraced (frowned upon because Mrs. Fitzroy thought the couple too young for matrimony at 36 and 63) and a melodramatic suicide following one character’s acceptance of two marriage proposals seemingly within a “short time” of one another, meaning more like hours or even minutes.  Meanwhile, a wedding date is never set for Elfrida and Frederic, and when time passes and Frederic seems almost lost to her, Elfrida secures her desired outcome through fainting fits.



Monday, February 02, 2026

Killer Bees - MTG 4E

 

I remember seeing this card and just loving it. Unfortunately, I was never able to make a deck with this card. That didn't really matter to me at the time though, as I was just as likely to put my cards in a binder and look at them as I was to actually use them :-D This is also one of the few "serious" cards by Phil Foglio, instead of his typically silly and nonsensical art, like "Gaseous Form". 


February '26 Roundup & Ramblings

  Raw Data: Novels/Novellas - 9 ↑ Short Stories - 1 ↑ Manga/Graphic Novels - 0 - Comics - 1 ↑ Average Rating - 3...