Ye have heard it said “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” but I bring a new Rule for ye to follow.
If ye would be healthy, wealthy and wise, prepare for thyself a libation. Measure out in equal portions milk, golden eggnog and the ground remains of one fruit of the vanilla met-rx tree. No more, no less lest my wrath fall upon all the congregation and ye suffer a plague for thy willful disobedience.
Blend together at high speed in ye olden blender and thusly pour out the libation into ye olde thyme’y mug. Drink to the health of thyself, thy neighbors and thy nation, that it shall go well with ye and ye shall live long and prosper in the land I have given ye.
But if this seem too hard for ye, then stick ye head in a bucket.
Amen and Amen!
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