It is time to once again celebrate that Authorial Recluse, Mr Zip. Mr Zip is turning 40 this month and that is something worth celebrating. Heck, he's older than my little sister for goodness sake!
This is as far into "The Jungle" as Mr Zip ever wants to explore. Give him concrete and pavement any day! Plus, all the accoutrements of civilization.
Point in case. You will NEVER find a Mr Mac's in the deepest darkest jungles of Africa or the Amazon. Mr Zip has never looked, but he's pretty sure it is the case. He's also never looked on the Moon OR Mars, but he's pretty sure there aren't any Mr Macs there either. Mr Zip is one smart monkey!
Besides, all Mr Zip has to do is traipse the couple of feet over to the oven and voila, there is a Deluxe Hamburger mac-n-cheese. It's almost like magic. And it tastes better than magic too, guaranteed!
Once he's stuffed himself and is about to enter a food coma, Mr Zip likes to go to his favorite haunt and just chill. Bookshelves are the place to be for Mr Zip and it's about all he's actually up for these days anyway. Mr Zip is feeling his age and wants some warm food, a comfortable place to sit and an uninterrupted snooze, preferably 2-3 days at a time.
Mr Zip wasn't always such a sedate, comfortable bachelor. Back in his hey-day, he was tearing up the carpets like you wouldn't believe. He also got hitched. Yes, you read that right, Mr Zip was married.
She was a blonde haired temptress from the Cabbage Patch clan. While both she and Mr Zip were just reaching their majority (they were both a couple of months old by that time), it was obvious that this Romance was Meant To Be. A lavish wedding was thrown by the entire First Grade class at school and unending bliss was just ahead, or so they thought. But forces beyond their control tore them apart and they were destined to never see each other again. After that, Mr Zip swore that his heart was a stone and he would never love another. It is a vow he has kept to this day.
Thankfully, Mr Zip has made friends over the years. Of course, when he first met Jimbo the Desperado, nobody was sure if it was going to be friendship or a bloodbath. It could have easily gone either way.
Thankfully, they bonded over their shared love of the book Grumpy Monkey. Now they're best buds as they occupy their own favorite niches on the bookshelves.
Of course, once Mr Zip wakes up from his 3day long nap, he needs a little pick-me-up. Thankfully, he's as fond of energy drinks as I am. Down the hatch! He hasn't exploded yet from that much caffeine.
Then it is time for some light reading. This decade it is the Complete Works of Shakespeare. Mr Zip ain't no rube from the turnip farm after all!
Mr Zip has enjoyed his time with you all, but now he says "Shove off". You heard the monkey!
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