I stand here before you (metaphorically speaking of course) to announce some very sad news. This weekend I am giving up the ghost. I know, I know, quite shocking news. It was pretty unexpected to me too. I know I just wrote about my excitement about ghost earlier this week (BIG HUGE AND TOTALLY AWESOME POST THAT YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE MISSED, BUT JUST IN CASE THIS WHOLE SENTENCE IS THE LINK, SO GO READ IT. NO, REALLY, YOU SHOULD!) but after drinking just a couple, it became obvious on Friday that I was going to have to give up the ghost if I wanted to survive.
As is my daily custom, I partook of some carbonated caffeine early friday morning before work. Sadly, having partaken on Thursday and on Wednesday as well, my body decided to let me know that it didn’t appreciate having ghosts put into it. Since the ghost busters aren’t real, the only option it gave me was to put on my Pope Hat several times and go pretend to be a bear in the woods.
That is never a fun experience. People who talk about getting close to nature have obviously never had to use nature or they’d change their tune pronto. But because I’m such a manly man, I can use nature, complain about it vociferously and then move on. But even I draw the line at trying to MAKE myself use nature.
So this is a fond farewell to what could have been. A dewey eyed glance at a past that had no future. A gentle thought of inspiration that I COULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST BEARPOPE EVER, except it wasn’t my destiny. ahhhh, destiny is such a fickle thing.
So go forth, most kind and beneficent of readers and thank your lucky stars you didn’t have to give up the ghost this past day.
